The thing about my mum wasn’t that she wanted to know what was going on, it was the way she sat me down on my bed or in the living room with a cup of tea or coffee or for that matter something else to drink and then we would sit there uncomfortably waiting for each other to say something but it usually took an hour or two before someone said something and then it would end in the biggest discussion ever.
We had been sitting for about an hour when my mum took a deep breath and looked at me.
“You’ve got to speak with me at some point.”
“Why is that? Why is it so important to you that you know every single thing that’s going on in my life?”
“What were you doing in London this time?”
“I haven’t done anything wrong okay.”
“I never said you did something wrong dear, I just wanna know what’s going on.”
“Nothing’s going on. People are just nosy.”
“But about what? That was a journalist Elena! Who have you been with this time?”
“Don’t make it sound like its wrong. You were like me once! You wanted to meet everyone and wanted to get to know people. You were keeping up with stuff, stuff that wasn’t yours to keep up with so why are you suddenly so up in my business?”
“I’m trying to protect you. That journalist wanted to know about the whole One Direction thing that we have had over and over with them before. Why are you denying them this time? What happened over there?”
“Nothing happened! I was just hanging out with my friends. Met the band. The usual stuff.”
My mum rolled her eyes and took another deep breath. I didn’t make this easy for her and I didn’t intent to make it easy for her because I really didn’t want her to know about all of this. It really wasn’t her business.
“Elena I can’t help you or protect you if you won’t let me help you. You clearly need help when different magazines want to speak with you about that band. You’ve met them before I know that.”
“Don’t you want my help?”
“No I don’t want your help. I don’t need help. I know what’s going on and the rest of the world doesn’t need to know about what’s going on. Harry is a friend of mine like we’ve talked about before even though you still think of it as surreal. He’s a friend of mine, I’m a friend of his and we care about each other. He’s a person and that’s what all of these journalists and magazines don’t get. I don’t care about the fame when it comes to my friend. When it comes to Harry Styles my idol I care a lot about his fame but that’s not the same. Those are for me two very different people in the same person. Is that so hard for you to understand?”
My mum looked at me a little hurt I guess she didn’t understand. She would never really understand when it came to this, because this was so far from everything she could ever imagine and it was so far from who she really was and maybe even far from who I was. It wasn’t normal in Denmark to do these things and I guess that’s why she was reacting the way she was.
“I really don’t need help. It’s not a problem. Some things just happen and I’m just confused okay? I’m confused about the things going on mum. Its normal isn’t it? My biggest idol and one of my closest friends is the same person. Wouldn’t that be confusing for anyone?”
“Of course it would sweetheart. I’m just trying to protect you.”
“I don’t need protection. They are good lads mum and I’m taking good care of myself. I promise.”
This was unusual for our talks to end like this. My dad would usually come around and make sure neither of us hurt the other one and I guess he was getting kinda tired of that. Especially with two adults!
My parents had been calling me an adult since I was 15 years old but honestly even though that was 5 years ago I still felt like a child most of the time and I guess that was the biggest problem because I had never really felt like an adult but had been treated like one for a very long time.