That's it, the man thought, I have an idea! A wicked smile overcame his features and he let out a chuckle, rubbing his palms together in a villain-like manner.
“Uh, old man?” the giant nudged Harold with the tip of his shoe.
“Old man?” Harold shrieked, immediately standing up and placing his hands on his hips in attempt to appear intimidating.
“Yes, old man,” he huffed.
“Very old,” the giant concluded.
“I’m thirty-three!” Harold grumbled, pushing his glasses up with his right hand repetitively to cover up his current expression.
“More like one hundred and thirty-three,” the giant rolled his eyes, quickly adding, “no offence,” to the end of his sentence.
Harold pulled out his phone and angrily texted his wife, Carpet.
Harold: Get me some tomatoes!
Carpet: uh, y??? sum wird expermint i suppose lol x
Harold: Of course, you shouldn't expect nothing less from me.
Carpet: kk beb, tha is a fridge full @ home x (ू◠ᴗ◠✻ू)
Harold: What is that?
Carpet: o it's a emoticon ! ha ha ha :)
Harold: Don't ever use it again.
Carpet: but u used it,??!
Harold: Good bye.
“What's wrong?” the giant asked, ruffling the old man’s hair.
“Ah, I feel your feel, bro. What happened?”
“She used an emoticon,” Harold shuddered.
“That's terrible,” the man gasped, “if I was you I'd want a divorce right away!”
“She helps with my experiments, though.”
“Well, she did start her life off as a piece of fabric..”