Everything I Didnt Say

5sos made a vow that girlfriends are off limits. But when Ashton falls in love with the girl next door, how will he keep it a secret. With bitter words spoken, everything's broken. It's too late to bring it back to life. With time ticking away, will it all be okay? Or will they fade regretting everything they didn't say.

Self harming,
Drug use,
Suicidal scenes,
Hospital scenarios,
Near death experiences,
Brutal Arguments

You could say it has everything but to a certain extent. Don't freak out if you feel uncomfortable about any of those things.
The story makes for a good read and you will not get bored. Give it a go!

Please Fan me and if this Fab fic isn't your cup of tea then I have 2 other fan fics that might float your boat.



22. How?.

Ashton's POV

I sat in hospital alone, Luke checked out earlier today. No one has visited me since the fights. I guess I am unloved now. Not like I feel like seeing any of them. Even though I could check out. I have no where to go. I mean I've tried leaving this world so may times but have failed. I really don't lie when I say no one wants me here, on planet earth. There isn't a single soul that loves me.

"I do" belarna cooed. I must've said the whole thing out loud. "Belarna?! Why Are you here?" I asked shocked to see her. "Ashton, I should've told you and now there's no holding back. I DIDNT CHEAT ON MICHAEL... Iwasraped" she murmured the last part. "What?" I questioned. "I was...raped Ashton!" She started to cry as she let out "and. Michael saved me okay?"

"Belarna, why didn't you tell me when it first happened instead of coming and breaking it to me 2 weeks later?" Ashton asked. "Ashton, it's because Sean... It was him. I wasn't going to tell you but I'm sick of the secrecy." Belarna wailed. "WHAT, as in my BROTHER! That's it I'm checking out!" I yelled. "Ashton dont do anything, I can call the police or something?" Belarna tried to stop me. "No. This. This is personal" i sneered. "What are you going to do Ashton?" She asked. I walked away.

I walked into Sean's house. The house that had once belonged to mum and dad. They had promised it to Sean on their will before they passed. Sean got everything. Anything i owned he would own the 'next gen' of it. He always had better things then me, a better life then me. I heard him make his way up the hall. As he turned the corner and saw me I punched his gut. He hit the floor. I got out my pocket knife. I flicked it revealing a sharpened blade that I carried always.

I push the blade stabbing his stomach. "This is for always leaving me in the shadows" "this is for always being better then me" "this is for all the times you've put me down" "this is for the way you treated me" "Sean I HATE YOU" the knife penetrated him several times.

I was out of control. I stood back. I closed my eyes and opened them. Multiple stab wounds. Realisation struck. This was my brother. What have I done?

"Sean! Sean! I just, IM SORRY" i yell shaking his body. He could kill all my friends but in the end he is my brother. I know I think I hate him but, at least he didn't kill me. He is lifeless... I look around his house and discover a few handy items that I take and leave.

*later that day*

"I'm a murder" i say staring at the mirror infront of me as I wash my face in belarnas bathroom. I havent told her what I did. This afternoon i became something I should never have recieved the title of. A murderer. I can't change the past. Sean was my only family member left.

"Ashton where have you been these past 4 hours?" Belarna asked.

"Belarna- i-"

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