~~A/N- I am fully aware that Katie isn’t in Seamus’ year, but in this fic, she is. Deal with it.
“Bell, Katie,” Professor McGonagall called, her voice echoing throughout the near-silent Great Hall. Katie sucked in her breath, nudging her way through the throng of first year students. Shakily, she sat down on the stool, and the Sorting Hat was placed on her head.
“Good mind, I see, yes, yes,” the Hat muttered, and Katie closed her eyes. Never before had she felt so stressed. She wanted to be a good witch, and she wanted to be in the house that would help her get there.
“Strong, brave, good friend at heart…..” The Sorting Hat’s soft voice trickled off, only before exploding seconds later.
“Gryffindor!” It yelled, this time for the whole Hall to hear. Katie grinned as she heard the farthest left table explode in cheers. She raced off of the stool, down from the platform, and into the nearest unoccupied seat with the rest of the Gryffindor’s. She was glad she had made it into the lion’s house, but she couldn’t help but feel relieved that she hadn’t been a Slytherin. That would have been awful.
“Hello!” A happy Irish voice chirped from beside her. Katie whipped around to come face-to-face with a cute, sweet looking boy with a wide grin and sparkling eyes.
“Hi, I’m Katie,” she replied, sticking out a tanned hand. The boy quickly shook it, chuckling slightly.
“I’m Seamus. I think we’re going to be friends.”
You can’t like him!
He’s your best friend!
Stupid, filthy, undeserving liar…..
Tell him how you really feel, coward!
You don’t deserve him.
You can’t like him. You're friends. That’s all you ever will be.
Katie opened her eyes, her face drenched in an icy sweat. Her breathing was ragged, her heart pounding in her chest. Another nightmare. She had been having them for the past three years now, ever since she had been at Hogwarts.
She sat up, rubbing her eyes and running her hands through her hair before lying back down.
Katie knew that it was pointless, trying to fall back asleep. She never did; not after waking up.
Not after thinking about Seamus.
“Hiya, Katie,” Seamus said the next morning, a broad smile on his face. Katie laughed, although her heart felt heavy. He was perfect, truly. Everything she looked for in a guy. Smart, sweet, funny, cute, always caring…..no. He was her friend, and only her friend, and her most recent nightmare had been sure to remind her of that.
“Hey, Seamus. I’m so tired,” she replied with a yawn, and the other Gryffindor pouted.
“Yeah, I was up all night worrying about that essay due in Potions. God, I really hate Snape,” he mumbled, picking at the slightly burnt toast that lay on his plate.
“Mhmmm,” she agreed, although she didn’t. Not really. Well, she did hate Snape, and she had worried about the essay, but what had kept her up was something she was really not in the mood to talk about. Not with him, at least.
Tell him the truth, liar! Keeping secrets from your best friend!
“I have to go,” Katie whispered, gathering her things and hurrying off before Seamus could ask her where she was going.
You’re nothing but a liar! It’s no wonder he doesn’t love you!
You can’t like him, you’re his best friend.
He’ll never like you back, anyway.
You’re a piece of dirt, liar, filthy liar…….
Katie sat on one of the couches in the Common Room, staring at the wall opposite of her. She felt dead, at least on the inside. She couldn’t take it. All the stress, both of schoolwork and of Seamus, was weighing down on her. The more she tried to convince herself that she didn’t like him, the more she did. It was pathetic.
“Katie?” Seamus asked quietly, plopping down next to her and resting his warm hand on her skinny shoulder. She turned away, barely able to look at his face.
She loved him.
“Yeah?” She replied slowly, still not daring to look at him in the eye.
“Something’s wrong, I know it is. Please talk to me,” he asserted, using one of his index finger to tilt her chin up so her eyes met his. She tried to look away, but his steady gaze was too strong.
“Something is and I want to know what.”
“Fine. You want to know what’s wrong? I’ll tell you. I’ve liked you for years, Seamus, and when I say that I don’t, I know I’m only lying to myself. I have nightmares every night, centered mostly around me and what a dirty, filthy person I am. I know you won’t like me. I know I’ve ruined our friendship. We’re supposed to be best friends, and that’s it. I bet you hate me! I’m sorry! I’m sorry-“she stopped talking. Seamus had placed a finger on her lips, cutting her off.
“You know none of that’s true. You’re not dirty, and you’re not filthy. You should have come to me about the nightmares, I’d have been glad to listen. Don’t be sorry. I don’t hate you, not at all. And I do like you,” he whispered, tucking a stray piece of jet black hair behind her ear. Katie’s breathing hitched.
“What?” She mumbled, not quiet believing her ears.
“I like you, Katie, for a long time now. Believe me.” She couldn’t quite believe her ears. He…..Liked her?
“Oh,” she mumbled, smiling slightly.
“Yeah, ‘oh’” he replied, his eyes twinkling with apparent happiness. Katie giggled and leaned against him, allowing Seamus to slip her hand into his.
They sat like this for some time, not really keeping track of the clock. Katie felt comfortable, happy, and warm. Seamus’ hand squeezed hers every once in a while, letting her know that he was there. She listened to his breathing, memorized the profile of his beautiful face.
“Goodnight, Katie Bell,” he muttered after everyone else had already gone to bed. Katie grinned up at him, smile strong and wide.
Seamus placed a light kiss on her forehead before running up to his dormitory.
For the first time in years, Katie knew that she wouldn’t be plagued by nightmares.
For the first time in years, she would happily dream.