My ears snap to attention, listening eagerly to the footsteps which belong to my sister and to another. Her steps are light meaning that she's excited. I roll my eyes and glare at the screen in front of me. What jock is it this time? Studying is the excuse right? When isn't it.
"Alex, look who it is." I can hear the excitement and happiness in her voice which makes me want to throw up. Maybe not a jock considering she would head straight to her room and do the nasty.
I make an inaudible noise in my throat and then my whole body stiffens as I hear his voice. The voice that taunted me. It was different to his intrigued voice from earlier in class. He was ready to tease me again, just like when we were in primary school.
"Come on Chubby Ally. Take a look and consume your self in my good looks." I wanted to puke yet I felt self conscious, I haven't been called that in years and it reminded me how good it didn't feel. Tara doubled over in laughter, she must have missed the ratchet days of Colton Mayes.
I began to spin 'round in my chair unwillingly but I haven't gone a day without bad manners, my fists were clenched at my thighs. I felt another presence, I almost forgot Luke was there but his hands were mimiking mine, also clenched but there was something different about him, there was much more fury in his eyes.
I scowled at Colton who wasn't laughing anymore, his eyes sort of widened and he looked taken aback. Then he composed himself by slouched in his own skin and he did what he did best 'acted cool.'
"Not so chubby anymore Ally." He teased, eyeing me all over. I felt sick, violated and vulnerable. I had no where to hide. I hated this feeling. He had recognition in his eyes from class, he licked his lips towards me. My eyes jerked to the direction and sound of knuckles cracking. Brooks.
"Wow Ally, when did you get so sexy?" He asked, he seemed serious and I felt like I was going to be sick there and then. Colton, Colton Mayes called me sexy, all ever wanted to here, maybe something more endearing when I was little but either way, a compliment from the man himself. I wish that I didn't waste helpless years falling at this stupid boys presence. Tara looked disgusted and slammed her arm into his ribs.
"Tara, didn't you always tell me to be honest and not to lie?" He said, looking at his best friend and partner in crime. He rubbed the area which she smacked. Did that mean he was utterly star struck and thinks that I'm sexy. I couldn't feel more dirty.
I listened attentively to the sound of teeth grinding, I looked up at Brooks whose jaw was clenched. His jaw line was more defined when he did that and let me tell you, it is a sight to see. Now let me tell you, when Brooks is angry his whole body shows it. He was so tense that his body muscles were flexing. Luckily I was sitting. He seemed mad for some unknown reason. It couldn't be because of Colton's sly comments, Luke doesn't care for me like that.
"What do you want Colt?" I spat at him. He was the only one who called me Ally and I hated him for that. I was the only one who called him Colt, I hated myself for that.
"Some manners would be nice considering I haven't seen you for a year-" He paused, averting his gaze to the other figure in the room that everyone looked past momentarily.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't Mr Big Shot. Luke, how is life treating you?" His voice was bitter, that was when I knew those boys had a history together. How did they know eachother? School, yes but their lives are too conflicting, they have no common interests.
"Go back to the WA, no one wants you here." Luke bit back, his fists in the same position as before. He was mocking the same bitter voice Colt used.
"Now Luke, don't be like that. I'm pretty sure that Ally here is excited to see me." He smirked at me, rolling his tongue from within his mouth.
He licked his lips. "Tara, did we interrupt something here?" He was obviously directing the question towards Luke and I.
Yes you did interrupt.
"Are you two..." He trailed off motioning his hands between Luke and I. I found myself blushing instead of objecting.
Alex, what are you doing? He is a jerk. Say no!
Luke wasn't replying either, in fact he stayed silent, his hands still clenched by his side but he was letting off a vibe that I was trying to depict. Protection?
"Nothing?" Colt checked between us for clarification.
"Good." He smirked and there was an obvious look of determination in his eyes. Was that directed towards me?
"Colton," Tara said, finally speaking up. She stood with such discomfort. It seemed like forever until his eyes left my body and finally looked at the girl desperate for his attention.
"Let's leave them now." She said awkwardly and he nodded.
"See you soon, Luke." He said sourly in Luke's direction then he smiled at me, a smile that girls swoon for, that used to be me.
"And you Ally, I'll see you very soon." With a skilled wink he left. I was left with an extremely enraged Luke.
"I hate that guy." He muttered to himself.
"Why?" I questioned, studying his profile. I felt so unclean but I decided to focus my attention on Brooks who was now sitting on my bed trying to calm down.
"Never mind." He tried to brush it off. I know that he wasn't in the mood to talk about it and decided to leave it alone because when I'm in that mood I hate people who keep pestering me for an answer.
Something was wrong though, I wanted him to tell me or at least one day. I should not be feeling that.
I returned back to my chemistry assignment which my head was just not in. After reading my previous sentence over and over again in my head a new voice spoke, this voice grabbed my attention. It was calm and sincere.
"Thank you." He said, I looked over at him, he was staring at his hands which seemed so interesting.
"For what?" I asked, my mind was definitely not there at all.
"For not pushing it." He said as if it meant more than the actual gesture. I found myself smiling like a fool.
Were we having a moment?
"It's okay," I spoke. "I know how you feel, I hate him too." I said, fiddling with the stack paper beside me which I organised into alphabetical order yesterday. And no, I don't have OCD, it's just I was extremely bored.
"Why?" His head jerked up, he was interested. Luke Brooks was interested in what I had to say.
Wait, can I just pause at the fact that there is a boy in my room, a very attractive boy, a very attractive experienced boy. I killed it.
"Um.." I didn't want to share that I was chubby, it's embarrassing and I didn't want him to judge. For all I know once or if I tell him, it will be broad casted across the entire school.
Then he did something that surprised me, he patted the spot on my bed beside him, motioning for me to join him. He looked serious, a face I haven't seen on Mr. Brooks. My mind zoomed across every happy emotion, insecure thought and even random things like chopsticks, I was freaking out. He wanted me to sit near him?
After seconds of contemplating, I did it for my 15 year old self, I got up off the chair and sat next to the boy who had my undivided attention and funnily enough, I had his.
"Did he do something to you?" I didn't like Brooks' face full of concern. It was so out of his character. I stared at the most interesting thing at the moment, my hands.
"How long have you known him for?" He asked, that was easy and not too personal.
"Since kindergarten." I whispered, fidgeting my my hands. Intertwining my fingers, interlocking them, twisting them around.
"How did he hurt you?" He asked, afraid of my reaction and also my answer. Did Luke actually care for my response?
"He teased me and played tricks on me." I winced waiting for Luke to laugh and to say. "You probably deserved it."
I looked over at him and he looked like he was actually feeling my pain. "What did he say?" he asked with sympathy and empathy. Something that I was quite frankly scared to see in Luke's eyes.
"You'll laugh." I blurted out pathetically. Why was I having this conversation with Luke? I mean of all people Luke? The boy who states corny yet extremely blush worthy sexual lines. The boy who won't touch a nappy. The boy who has every other girls attention in the school was here, on my bed, listening to my problems.
"I would never laugh at you." He said, his eyes were full of honesty. Luke let off this vibe as if I could trust him, trust him with my deepest, darkest secret. The crazy thing was that I believed him.
"Well, I was a bit chubby in primary school. He would tease me calling me 'Chubby Ally.'" I winced, recalling in my mind all the sixth graders pointing at me and laughing, they chanted 'Chubby Ally' and you dont even need to guess who the ringleaders were.
"He would push me into mud, pull my hair." I continued. "He was the cause of my arm being broken, not once but twice. He put a frog in my bed. He told everyone I had cooties."
"I know it's stupid but those things effected me." I whispered. I couldn't actually believe that I was sitting on my bed and sharing my deep secrets with Luke, of all people.
A warm hand found its way in my own. Suddenly my heart began to flutter and thump loudly from within my chest. There goes the butterflies, the nerves circling my stomach. I met his eyes and he gave me a reassuring smile.
"He is such a dick." He said so sourly, I knew I was dealing with Luke so what was I expecting? My Romeo saying 'I wish I was there to save you' or 'I will get him back for you'. What can I say? Yes, I am a helpless romantic.
I think this is a moment. In fact, I'm certain that this is a moment.
Of course, all was to be ruined by a very inconvenient Annabelle, crying. Luke's head dropped in disappointment and I looked at him, he was clearly annoyed. But why? It's just me that he was interrupted from.
I glanced at my watch. "She's probably hungry." I said hesitantly. Reluctantly, Luke's hand left mine. All magic lost. Thanks Annabelle- Hint my sarcasm.
"I'll just go get her some food." I mumbled as I walked out of the room, I was practically running out though, way too much emotion in that room.
I've watched enough television. Observing the two characters and all the chemistry between them. I can depict an endearing moment just by one glance on their faces. That face was mirrored on Luke and it made me slightly overwhelmed. Was he feeling some thing too?
Keep it together Alex. No boys, you don't have time for them anyway. You are too busy.
I shook my head in attempt to rid it off all thoughts as I descended down the stairs. I could hear movement from within the kitchen, it's too early for my parents to be home from work. I mustered up the courage to catch the hungry criminal in my kitchen. Although burglar wasn't the word to fit him, he was still a criminal in my eyes.
Leaned up against the bench, he took a bite of his sandwich. Eyes perked up at the sight of me. Oh no. Just the person who I didn't want to be in a room alone with.
"Hey Ally." He said in a sing song voice. I clenched my jaw, placing pressure on my teeth.
"What are you still doing here Colt." I emphasized 'still' because I wanted to make him aware that he was not welcome or wanted.
"Come on Ally, your talking as if you hate me." He said that a little laugh as if it were impossible. I used the straightest face I could pull just showing how possible it was to hate Colt.
It was like a hit a spot right to the tee, my hate for him affected him. "Ally, you don't hate me, do you?" He was genuinely concerned and worried, waiting impatiently for the answer.
"Pretty darn close to it." I shot back which caught him unprepared.
"Ally," he said softly. "Why?" He asked and I scoffed, scoffed so hard my throat hurt.
"There would be a shorter list, in fact no list if you were to ask me 'Why do you like me'." I replied, reaching for the baby food in the upper hand cupboard. I felt like such a bitch but I was doing it for my 11 year old self.
"What are you doing hanging around Luke Brooks anyway, he's dead weight." Colt was still a bit hurt, an emotion I never wanted to see on him because this then left me to feel guilty.
"He's got a bigger reputation here since you left Colt." I said coldly, grasping a plastic teaspoon in my hand.
"Yeah, I heard. Tara told me all about the man whore you have in your room. Has he screwed you yet?" He asked, he seemed serious and it could have been sincere if he used better language.
"No, not that it's any of your business." I replied, getting a napkin. While I'm here I might as well get something for Luke and I to eat. Even thinking about food and looking at Colt's sandwich made my tummy grumble in hunger.
"You want a bite?" He offered, gesturing his sandwich closer to me after noticing my mouth watering at the look of food. Wait. Our roles were reversed. Colt was being kind and I was being the ass hole.
He deserves it.
"I can make you one?" He offered, I had to hold back the laugh. Colt being nice. Colt and nice don't fit in the same sentence.
"No thank you, Colton, don't think I'm not ready for your pranks. I'm literally setting myself up for pain, allowing you to make me a sandwich." I was much more aware now and smarter to out smart the prankster.
"Are you talking about primary-" This was a topic I was not wanting to discuss with Colt. I quickly said goodbye and I ran out of the room. He called after to me but I ignored him.
"It sounds like you ran a mile." Luke laughed as I entered my room, huffing and puffing. I closed the door behind me just so I wouldn't have another encounter with Colt.
"Woah." Luke said loudly, grasping my attention.
"If you wanted to take it to the next level you could have just said so." Luke said with a smirk, eyeing the closed door.
"Shut up Brooks and eat." I said and I threw him a packet of smiths original thins chips. With his superb reflexes he caught the packet, ripping them open, seductively he began to munch on the greasy goodness which I imitated, just without the sexual looks and noises.
I took longer to eat my chips and Luke ate them considerably fast. He took it upon himself to feed Annabelle and I smiled, it was so cute to see him feeding her. I should just shut up.
"Soon, she's going to be grown up, we'll be dragging her out of night clubs, forcing the alcohol out of her hands." He said, smiling down at the baby.
"She gets that from you, the bad ass side." I blamed with a slight chuckle.
"You think I'm a bad ass?" He asked, with an eye brow raised and the smirk on his lips.
"That would define the constant detentions, the 'I don't give a shit' attitude, the constant breaking of rules. I could continue but no one really has the time." I told him and he smiled at my words.
"Rules were meant to be broken." He simply stated.
"Not in my books." I replied, scrunching up the now empty packet of chips.
"Right sorry, I forgot that we were dealing with the Good Girl here. I wouldn't be surprised if you haven't been to a high school party." He used as an example and I stayed silent.
He stood frozen in disbelief. "I know I'm contradicting myself but really, not one party?" His eyes were wide open. I liked the fact that I could surprise him...and make him laugh.
"Actually, I have been to one, my Nonna's 70th birthday party. That was the bomb." I said, trying not to sound too much like a loser but he just laughed with me.
"You make me laugh Teddy." That nickname had kept me up at night. Teddy had nothing to do with my name. How did he get it?
"But you aren't getting away with it that easily, just your luck, there is a high school open house party tonight. And guess what? I'm taking you." He said.
Suddenly I didn't feel so safe. I felt worried. I've heard stories, not good stories at all about what happens at these parties. Drugs, sex and loud music is not my scene. It was not my environment at all, yet it suited him so perfectly.
"Did someone say party?" It was a common entrance made by Bec but this time I wished she didn't say it. I know Bec, she is wild. She has been hassling me to come with her to one of these parties, now that she knows, I'm doomed. She blushed slightly in embarrassment when she saw Luke, reflecting on her entrance. I had almost forgotten that she was coming over and I hated myself for that because I was too busy focusing on Brooks.
He's easy to focus on.
"Hi." She said fairly quietly which caused both Luke and I to laugh. Man, I love his laugh.
WAIT! Did I just associate the L-word with Brooks? Never again. Never to describe a particular aspect about him. Never.
"Al here is going to her first high school party." Luke announced to Bec who almost fell weakly to her knees, I could hear her hyperventilating because Brooks spoke to her.
And before I knew it, I was being rushed to the bathroom to have a shower. I was informed that there will be an outfit laid out for me, with the combined help of Brooks and Bec. As the warm water soaked my skin, the nerves killed me. What if's were destroying my mind. As I skipped to my room in only a towel, with only the water on my back I had to of course meet eye with Brooks.
He smirked at me and looked at me as though he could see straight through the towel. He licked his lips before saluting me and following Bec's footsteps downstairs. I locked the door to my room to prevent any pervs, not that anyone wanted to see my body. Just as instructed, there was a killer outfit on my bed, one that I wouldn't be able to piece together myself. Lace up ankle boots caught my attention first, liquid black tights soon followed and then the main attraction. It was an indie dress, it wasn't fitted, in fact it had no shape to it but it was beyond gorgeous.
I know that it didn't belong to my collection so I'm pretty sure it belonged to Bec. There was a sticky note attached to the dress which I read with a smile. I recognised the handwriting at once 'The one thing to complete this outfit would be my leather jacket. Too bad that you aren't my girlfriend - Brooks'
He even used the name I called him. That's his last name stupid, nothing special. There was obviously a message he was trying to get across but I subsided it because it was probably just Brooks being his usual cocky, arrogant and smart ass, self. It felt good to dress up, being invisible I don't really get invited to parties. Correction; I never get invited.
Bec came in soon after and she curled my hair, I noticed she changed too, something tells me that she was going to try and get me to this party in the first place, Luke was just a bonus. He always is. She put a light amount of make up on because Luke told her that he likes girls with little or no make up. I told her to cake me up in return but she just laughed.
I looked in the mirror and I looked transformed. Maybe just a little. It wasn't a massive difference. I just ditched the old shirts in return for a smashing dress, I ditched the books for make up but it felt good. One night out. Turns out Colton and Tara were going to this party too. Tara glared at me as we all locked up the house and left. Colton's eyes never left my body and I did not like it.
"Al". Luke said almost breathlessly which made my breath hitch.
"You look......" A part of me wanted him to say beautiful but that's crazy.
"......Extremely sexy." And there is Luke Brooks for you. In turn, it was better than I expected. I smiled like an idiot and I was blushing too.
"Ready to go?" He said, gesturing towards my car, which of course he had the keys of.
"Yes." I replied weakly. Luke Brooks called me, Alex Binks, sexy.
"Are you all right?" He asked, looking at my faint face.
"Couldn't be any better." I replied. Pathetic Alex. Now you are smiling like a moron as well. Nice effort.
Bec blabbered on the whole car ride about her dreams finally coming true, Luke gave us tips and warnings which was kind of cute. We were both pretty hyped considering our first times at a party. There was a little voice in the back of my head that told me it's a bad idea. Reminding me about all the articles I read about these house parties.
"You won't leave me will you?" I asked aloud, I covered my mouth as soon as the words left my lips. I sounded so desperate and needy. He doesn't need to feel obligated to look after me. I feel so stupid.
He looked at me and gave the most reassuring smile, as if my need for him meant a lot to him. "I'll be right by your side." He said and once again I believed him. The nerves began to settle and I released the breath that I wasn't aware that I was holding. Upon arriving, I could hear the music blaring from the other side of the street. I stood at the front door and my heart was racing in excitement.
I could smell sweat, I could see bodies getting hot and heavy against the walls, I heard chants and music, the energy was crazy, I could feel it all through my body. The adrenaline was thriving as we weaved through the crowds of people I had never seen before. Brooks told me to be careful as he got us drinks. The first thing he told me was to not accept a drive from strangers, so when Tara offered me a drink, I accepted, she wasn't a stranger.
It didn't taste like cordial, I had to have another one because I couldn't depict what the flavour or what it was and it was beginning to agitate me. But it made me feel warm and it settled my nerves as I swished the drink around my mouth. "Where did you get this?" Luke asked, snatching the plastic cup out of my hands.
"Tara," I said slowly. Luke groaned loudly and he chucked my drink on the floor, causing it to splatter everywhere. People's shoes became soaked but no one took notice as they were all busy chattering away.
"Heyyy!" I slurred out. Oh no! I've read about these symptoms. That's a funny word. Symptoms.
"Luke, getting her wasted before hand, clever." I heard a booming husky voice said but Luke just shoved him out of the way. Luke gently but not loosely grabbed hold of my wrist. Electricity flew through my body and I couldn't contain my excitement.
The cold air was a wake up call, it made me aware of the fact that I was outside. It nibbled on my skin causing goosebumps to arise from the surface of my skin. Tara was also outside and I waved to her and she had an evil grin on her face.
"I want to go back inside." I told Luke, turning on my heel.
"How much of that did you drink?" he asked me, concern radiating off his face.
"This much." I said, making a circle with my thumb and index finger. I brought the circle to my eye and looked through it and laughed. It was funny.
"That much." Luke sighed inwardly. I observed as he took his jacket off and wrapped in around my shoulders. I nuzzled my head into the warmth. It smelt like him.
"Now my out fit is complete." I laughed, referring to his note. He laughed too.
"Let's get you home." Brooks said, wrapping his arm around me and walking me to the car.
"No." I pouted. "This is my first party I'm not leaving now." I complained.
"You are leaving because you drunk." his words registered like a bullet in my forehead.
Everything I vowed against I broke in 5 minutes. I was drunk. Drunk, as in intoxicated. As in underage. I should just go to the police station now and have them cuff me. Drunk. My first party. The first law I broke. I say that as though there are going to be more laws that I'm going to break. It's Tara's fault. All of it.
Luke drove me home, the car gave me a head ache, it moved too much. I climbed to stairs to my room as though it were a mountain. He ended up carrying me. He slipped off my shoes, he lifted my blankets over my shoulder before closing the light.
"Wait!" I exclaimed as though it were a matter of life and death.
"What is it?" He asked, a worried tone in his voice.
"Stay, please." I begged. I knew he wouldn't. Then again, the Bad Boy seemed to be constantly surprising me. He must have heard the desperateness in my voice. He slipped into my sheets and I curled up next to him. At first he laid still, but then he molded into my form. He smelt nice. His arms made me feel safe and protected.
I liked the warm feeling in my stomach and I think it was time to admit that Luke was the cause of this feeling because deep down, as much as he gets on my nerves, I think I've developed a crush. A crush on Mr. Player.