“What have you been up to?” Frankie asked me through the computer screen.
“Nothing.” He looked confused for a minute.
“What are you doing home? The boys are on tour. I thought you went with them?” He asked and I just looked down. “Violet? What is going on? Do I need to fly out there?” He asked panicked and I could see he was typing away on his laptop.
“Daniel…” I trailed off.
“No he didn’t.” He said looking up from the keyboard.
“He broke up with me.” I answered and he just looked at me.
“Why?” He asked and I shrugged.
“He said I was too messed up to be with.”
“What type of bullcrap is that?” He asked and I shrugged.
“Not sure but I’m falling apart.” I answered. I wasn’t even sure as to how I was still alive but here I am. “I’ve just been…. Trying to find things to keep my mind off of it.”
“If he can’t deal with you when you’re having a hard time he doesn’t deserve you.” He said and I smiled at him.
“But I think I deserve him.” I said. I really did believe that I should be with him. He meant the world to me and I found it so unfair that he didn’t want to be with me.After all the shit I had been through he was there for me to fall back on but what do I do when the only person who was keeping you sane, left?
I watch as Daniel had been bringing different girls back to the hotel room every night. I knew no matter what Violet wasn’t going to like that but I wasn’t going to be the one to tell her.
“What is with him and hooking up with a ton of different people?” Jai asked me and I shrugged.
“Did he break up with Violet? Is that why she left us?” Luke asked.
“I was thinking the same thing.” I said looking at him as we were sitting on the beach and some girl was sitting on his lap and had her tongue down his throat. “And that’s why she was crying every night last week.”
“She was crying and we didn’t know?” Jai asked.
“I knew. I just didn’t think anything of it.” Just then Frankie began calling me. “What up?” I asked him.
“You need to send someone over to your house right now! Something’s wrong with Violet! I was just talking to her but she hung up on me and I’m afraid of what is going on! I just booked a plane ticket to head over there tomorrow morning but someone needs to go there now!” He said panicked.
“Okay okay okay! Thank you!” I said before hanging up. Jai and Luke sat there worried about what was going on. “Auntie Jen!” I shouted into the phone. “Please go check on Violet!” I shouted into the phone before she rushed an answer and hung up. After trying to text and call Violet many times and her not answering I became very worried. “Daniel! I’m going to kick your ass!” I said while ripping the girl off of his lap. “If my sister kills herself because you broke her heart, you’re out.” I said getting close to his face.
“What the hell are you talking about?” He asked me looking at me. “I didn’t do anything.”
“Oh there isn’t? She didn’t cry every single day last week before her body finally shut down and she was able to forget who you were but then she woke up to your face every single morning and she had no way of getting away from it. This is your fault and if she hurts herself, I will torture you.” I said. “You better hope to god she doesn’t hurt herself.”
I woke up in the hospital with Frankie and my aunt with me. I blinked but it wasn’t like in the movies where my eyes would open super easy and everyone would be quiet when I did so and wait for me to say something. It wasn’t like that at all. My eyelids felt like bricks and my throat was dry.
“How long have I been out?” I asked.
“Three days.” Frankie answered. “Are you hungry?” He asked holding my hand sitting in the chair next to my bed.
“No. What did I do?” I asked him.
“You uh, cut yourself and took one too many pills.” He answered.
“How many?” I asked.
“Fifteen.” He answered. “Of the highest dose you could find in the house.”
“You’re not going to make me stay here are you?” I asked him.
“It’s not up to me.” He answered as Beau came walking into the room.
“Daniel isn’t here is he?” I asked. “I don’t want to see him.”
“He is but I won’t make you seem him if you don’t want to.” He answered. “Do you want anything?” He asked.
“Are you going to make me stay here?” I asked him and he didn’t answer me. “Beau! Are you going to make me stay here?”
“Yes Violet. They have a bunch of different area’s here for teens like you. Ones with cancer, eating disorders, depression. Anything. I think this would be good for you.” He answered.
“No what would be good for me is if Daniel didn’t break my heart.” He just looked down.
“No don’t. It’s his fault I’m in here! I wouldn’t have to be here if he wasn’t such an asshole and what’s this?!” I asked pulling my phone off the bedside table and opening the photo’s that were all over twitter of him with different girls. “These are all over the place! Was he doing this while he was with me?!” I asked.
“He better not have.”
“I gave him everything.” I whispered as I looked over the pictures and tears formed in my eyes. “He took away everything from me.” I whispered further. “How do I get that back?” I asked.
“You don’t, Honey.” Frankie said. “But we can help you get over it.”
“How am I going to get over that? He was the first person to kiss me, to date me, to have sex with me, to take me on a real date. How do you possibly get over that? And on top of that you’re going to make me stay in this place? With four white walls and to leave me with my thoughts? You really think that is going to work?”
“There is nothing here to hurt you.” Beau said.
“My thoughts won’t hurt me?”
“Violet just please.” Beau said and I sat back crossing my arms as I cried more. “Why did he do that to me?” I asked before Beau wrapped his arms around me.
“I don’t know, Vi.” He answered and I could barely hear him over my sobs. He went to pull back but I uncrossed my arms and held him tighter.
“Don’t go.” I said moving over so he could sit on the bed with me as I laid my head on his chest.
“I would never leave you.” He said rubbing my hair while he turned on the T.V. “Would you like to see Jai? He’s worried.” Beau said I nodded my head.
“I guess so.” I answered before Frankie went to the waiting room and came back with Jai.
“Hey kid.” He said kissing the top of my head. “How you feeling?” He asked and I just shrugged.
“However people feel after a breakup.” I answered.
“Hungry?” He asked and I shook my head no.
“Are you?” I asked and they laughed.
“Yes. Thank you for asking.” He said smiling and I smiled a little too and I could see the lights sparkle in his eyes as I smiled. “Luke is worried about you.” He said as he sat down on the couch.
“He should be. This is partly his fault too.” I said.
“Who’s fault is it most?” He asked and I sighed.
“Who do you think?” I asked looking at the door. “Why do I even have to answer that?” I asked and he just shrugged. “They are worried? Worried about what? They weren’t worried when they were breaking my heart.”
“Violet, we got a call that you were in the hospital with taking too many pills and cuts lining your wrists. Of course they are worried.” Jai answered and I could see where he was coming from but I wasn’t going to accept an apology from either of them. They fucked me over and I was done with both of them.
“They can come and see me but I am not accepting an apology.” I answered laying down and cuddling further into Beau’s side. I was so tired but I knew they boys all needed to see me. “So you’re really going to make me stay here?” I asked.
“Yes. Just until we are off tour and then I’m taking you home with me.”
“Will I get my own room?”
“You might have to share. Depending on what other people are going through.” He answered and I nodded my head.
“When will I be moved there?” I asked.
“Whenever you feel better.” I nodded my head before Luke and Daniel walked through the door. Each of them taking a seat on the couch but not saying anything to me. I just looked at them. Seeing Daniel made my eyes water and I buried my face into Beau’s side and sobbed.
“I’m sorry.” I heard Daniel whisper and I just shook my head. I felt many hands all over me and I didn’t even bother shaking them off. There wasn’t a point anymore.
“We are here to help you. I won’t let anything hurt you.” Beau said was he wrapped me in his arms.
“This is all my fault.” Daniel said and I looked up to see him sitting in the chair next to the bed with his head in his hands. At least he knew it was all his fault.
But watching her sleeping on the bed made it seem like she was dead. I knew this was all my fault, if I just talked with her and tried to deal and help her with whatever was going on she wouldn’t be here right now. But I can’t take back anything I said and I know she is never going to want to hear an apology from me. Like she would even accept it anyway.
“What are you thinking about?” Luke asked as we sat in the hospital room at nearly midnight while Violet slept in Beau’s arms and the rest of us looked on wanting to sleep too. Being on tour you found any place to sleep so James and Jai were nearly on top of each other on the floor.
“Her. Me.” I answered. “I messed it up so bad and now I’m never going to get it back.” I said. “Why would she ever take me back?” I asked and he shrugged.
“I think I messed it up too. I yelled and went off about so much stuff.” He said and I just looked at him.
“Think she will ever forgive us?” He just shrugged. The odds didn’t look good.
I had to literally drag Beau away from the hospital as we needed to head back to tour because we already set back some concerts because we needed to come home. I knew Violet was mad at some of us but we were still her family and we still needed to be there for her in her time of need.
“She is in good hands.” Yesterday we had moved her to her own room. We were told we could decorate it so we spend the day hanging up her posters, pictures and anything else we took from her room.
“I really hope so.” Beau said as I finally got him seated on the plane.
“Me too.” I whispered before sitting down and laying my head back. If that girl didn’t make it, neither would I. Maybe right now just wasn’t the time for us to be together and I knew I needed to give her space because she might not want to be with me. “Do you think she likes her room?” I asked him as we were finally in the air and he nodded his head.
“She was so happy when we carried her things in. I haven’t seen her that happy in a while.” He said and I smiled.
“Do you think she still wants to be with me?”
“Yes. But I do not think it is the right time right now. Give her some time to get over it and then make it up to her. She needs you, Daniel. She really does.” I knew he was serious because he called me Daniel. He never called me Daniel.