When I Go

When I go
I will stay long gone.


5. Say Uncle

I just need a few things then I can be on my way. I might be able to leave right from there now I think about it. My thoughts are buzzing around like happy bumble bees in a flower field. So much is going on and it is so exciting. 


I didn't even think about to stop by the Shack before I go. That would have been awful if I left the two without telling them goodbye. What if I die out there? Then I would really be sad. I feel a drop on my hand and I look up at the sky. 


"Bleh, again?" I give the dark clouds a look of discust and keep walking. I love the rain ,but man, I have a long trip ahead of me and I would prefer to be dry.  I get closer to the Shack as the sky gets darker. Poor Marcello must be having a heart attack right now.


Before I even get close to the door, it pops open and out launches a Marcello. Woah, speak of the devil. 


"Maple! My god woman! I thought you actually were going to do it!" He yells as he runs towards me and makes a commotion. "Don't do it!" He hugs me.


"Marcello what are you doing? What is wrong? What?" 


He then leads me inside the house talking in fast blather. We approach the house just for a peppered-haired Terho to pop out. 


"Maple are you insane!" 


Oh my god these people. 


"Now what did I do?" I say sarcastically. 


Marcello sits me down at my usual stool and sits in the one next to me. Terho walks around the counter to be across from me.


"Maple, I know that you want to just run off, but you got to think of this logically." Terho is looking directly at me. I crumble under pressure and get angry. How dare they tell me what I can and can not do.   


"Is that what this is about?" I huff and cross my arms. "Why do you two care so much?" 


It was Marcello's turn to try and talk into me, "Now Maple, I know this is what you want to do with all your heart, but I don't think now is the time." He has such a loving voice, yet, I still feel betrayed. He continues, "Do you even know where exactly this uncle of yours is?" 


"Well, no- not really, but I do know the general vicinity!" 


Terho asked, "Do you think this is going to just be a day trip? Two hour walk and your there? Maple, that is not just not how this world works. You doing this now, it's just not wise."  


"How is staying here wise? What do you two know?" I stop to look at their hurt faces. That was cold on my part, yet I was compelled to continue. "I mean, have either of you two been out of the village-" 


Terho cuts me off with a slam of a fist on the table. "Maple that is enough!" He pauses and looks at Marcello in helplessness. He softens his voice. "You know none of us can leave. That is just the rule." 


"Rule? There is no rule. You are all just a bunch of cowards. Too afraid to leave, there is no rule to keep you in here." 


I speak the truth but I know it hurt them. Sometimes ignorance really is bliss.  


"Look I- I am sorry, I swear I didn't mean to." I say quietly. 


"You can show that you are sorry by not going anywhere, and staying here for the night." 


"Hold on what?" In truth, I am very shocked at this answer. 


My whole plan was just to reassure them I wasn't going to do anything, go home, then leave. 

I bet they can read minds. 


"Maple we know what you are thinking and this whole idea is just not safe." 


Oh my good golly gosh they can.


"I am very sorry I put this idea in your head, that was rude of me, but please here me now, don't do this." 


"Y-you make it sound like I am trying to kill myself." 


"You are!" Marcello jumped up on his feet, "Going outside of this village is suicide!"


I look down at my hands, I dare not face Marcello. 


"We just don't want to see you get hurt." Adds Terho. 


I am an idiot. These two are the best thing I have regarding family, and here I am just talking to them like they are the trash I feed Velvet. 


Oh no! Velvet! 


I shoot up and hug Terho, then Marcello. 

"Thank you both so much but right now I gotta go!" 


Terho makes a slight noise as I run for the door. I shout on my way out. 


"I forgot to feed Velvet! I promise I wont do anything okay?" 

"Hold on missy! Velvet can wait!" 


Terho is leaning over the counter to yell at me.


"No she can't! She will eat the house if I don't feed her!" 


"Hey be back here soon!" Marcello shouts but I slam the door on his words. 


I burst through my house door panting.  If I had a clear head I would ask myself why I always need to bust through the door, and not just calmly open it. But I guess now is just not the time.


"Oh Velvet dear I am so sorry!" I am shouting to her like she can hear me through the solid wood door. 


Going to the kitchen I grab her bucket and start for the door, but I was halted by a meek voice. 


"I already did that." 


"Mom what the hell!" She made me jump a good six inches off the ground, and then again when she scolded me for my fowl language. "What is with you two coming home so early. Like really now, this never happens." 


Her soft voice was back again as she stated three simple words, "I was fired." She then covered up her mouth as if to not let anything else out, and sunk to the floor. The room is an erie silent, and I can hear velvet snorting 


"Oh my gosh, Mother are you all right?" I crouch down to her level and stick out a hand. "Do you know why you were fired?" 


She squeezed her eyes shut and tears rolled down her face. She didn't respond. 

"So no you don't or-" 


"I am pregnant, and they know that it is not your fathers." She sniffled then let out a wail. 


"Hold on, you what now? You are pregnant?" I stood up, my cheeks heating up. "It's not even my own father's child?" 

She is still weeping, but not denying or agreeing. 


I run my hands through my hair, just to get them tangled and rip them out. All I feel is hatred. I feel twisted inside and out. My mother is useless.


"You know what mom? You deserve every bit of this. I am not going to help you." 


Her head shoots up and she looks at me through teary eyes. "Maple you ungrateful child." She is scolding me but I brush it off. 


"No I don't care, I am going to live with Uncle Dennis. You figure this shit out on your own." 


"Maple. Eleanor. Rouge. How dare you speak this way. And don't you ever talk about your uncle in this house." 


I turn and walk to the door, "Well it is a good thing I am not in this house anymore." I grab the handle to the door, but mom grabs my travel sac and pulls me back. 


"You disgusting child," Her lips curling at every word, she probably even spit on me, "Don't you even dare think about it." 


"Let go of me you monster!" I push away her arm and run out the door with tears in my eyes. 

I kept running, no stopping, no looking back. I am running in a straight line from my house to the woods. I hear a pitiful scream from behind me, it only made me weep more. 



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