•Every night I'm losing you in a thousand faces•
•Long way home.5sos.
•The only reason.5sos.
- It was a nice Sunday after noon...I had recently exited the church.My parents were one of those religious preachers,that controlled everything I did.That mean't no drugs,no parties,and no boyfriends...well not exactly.My parents said I could have a boyfriend as long as there was no sexual activity involved.Since we're Christian,they make me wear this stupid 'promise ring'.
It's impossible to keep that promise...of not having sex till you're married...when you're eighteen years old.It sucks being a virgin though...temptation seems to take over a person so quick...when you're at parties.I figured of losing my virginity at this age...but I was wrong.Fear is what blocks temptation taking over me.
I guess the reason for them turning into Jesus freaks...would have to be the death of my older brother Stephen four years ago.Stephen had Dysthymia,which is a form of the bipolar disorder.
They don't really like talking about the day...Stephen's dysthymia took over his consience. It seemed to be a big deal to a lot of people,considering he was only nineteen years old.
- I feel pretty guilty,despite the fact that they think Im one of those perfect church girls,with a bright future ahead of me.If they found out what their daughter really does behind their backs...you'd feel bad enough to call the cops on them.
Mom and Dad are at a camp in Nevada...supposively helping troubled kids around my age,find there "christian faith".They claimed it would take the whole entire summer...but hey, now I dont have to lie to them about studying at Luanne's house.Luanne was the daughter of another pair of parents...who were Jesus freaks as well.If my parents ever asked Luanne about studying , she'd always cover for me.I made my parents trust me so much,that it wouldn't be nessecary.College is the hardest,and worst thing that can ever happen to you.
My car was a mess...of crumbled up candy wrappers,empty packs of cigarettes,and clothes.Of course I would have to clean that up,before my parents arrive from Church Camp.As I turned on the ignition,I straighted out the rear view...I was extemly responsible when it came to driving.
There were loads of people,blocking a couple cars trying to pass through...I was one of those cars.I really wanted to get home and get ready. My friend Calum invited me to one those crazy parties he goes to during the summer. I've been friends with Calum ever since freshman year,we've been unseparable since then.This party might just be the night when all of my fears of messing up ,go away.
As soon as the drive way cleared up,I quickly drove home.We lived in a small town,only two hours away from Los Angeles.I hungrily looked for a pack of cigarettes,which I stuffed under my mattress.The first time, I started smoking,would probably be during sophomore year.At first I absolutely despised them...even though I had never put one between my lips,until Calum convinced me into trying one.
Once it lit up,smoke quickly escaped from lips,putting it between them.I sat on the front steps,of the house,looking at pictures of cats on my phone.Looking up cats on google,while a smoke,enticed my compulsive addiction even more...for some reason.But once mom,and dad are back I'll just stick to chewing bubble gum.
Giving hickies to guys is as close I can get to having sex...I always end up leaving right at the point.I suddenly start to feel my heart throbbing rapidly,and run out breath.It's quite embarassing.
I took the last drag,before stubbing it out on the sidewalk.Living in Scaramento really sucked...from my opinion.My parents profusely said Los Angeles was the city of sin every God damn time, i'd ask them if we could visit. Sometimes I think about, running away with Calum...and never looking back mercilessly leaviing my parents.Then again I think about the numerous times they've suffered and struggled,due to Stephen's passing.
My phone started to vibrate against my lap,as I walked towards the entrace of my house,the caller ID read Calum.I had forgotten to call Calum for the past two weeks...I had a bad habit of forgetting about certain things.
-" Hey..." I said opening the door of my refrigerator,to get the half finished box of vanilla ice cream.
"Jane! Its been ages...what have you been doing? Have you swipped your Vcard yet?" Calum chuckled...I kind of told him about my little secret...you know of being a God damn VIRGIN,but he's the only one that knows...it's a long story.
"I've been praising the Lord...nothing really" I chuckled,fixing my dark hair into a ponytail.To be honest...I planned on swipping my "V card" this time.
"Yeah...im sure finding your christian faith if thats what you've been doing." He sarcastically said knowing those were Mom and Dad's signature words."You're going right?" He added .
"Where am I going?" I purposely said annoying him.
"Remember,two weeks ago...on graduation,I invited you to one of those parties?" He said with a hint of annoyance in his deep voice.
"Yeah...you're right." I said eating the last scoop of the ice cream box."By any chance is this party,out of town...?" I asked.
"Maybe...Jane just be ready before six." He said slightly laughing with a girl in the backround of the phone call.
"Yeah okay..." I exasperated hanging up,before Calum spoke,I hated when he would do that...screwing with a girl,while having a personal conversation...but then again I couldn't stay mad at him.
- I quickly slipped into one of my gray sweats, and drove to the nearest Walmart...to get my necessites.It was about 4:30 which means,there was barely any living souls at walmart.No one really shops at walmart around these hours,well at least in this town.
I patiently looked for aisle 9,where they stocked...Trojan condums. I was never the one to store condums,it was usually the guy that I was going to have sex with...but then again there would be none,because I would strangely get those minor panic attacks.
Sometimes I laugh at the memories of every guy,getting freaked out...by this crazy chic,which clearly has erotophobia(fear for sex). I guess learning about Aids,Herpes,STDs,etc...caused this phobia that I have.
You know my grandfather always used to say,'no matter how afraid you are of it,confront it'...when Stephen and I where young enough to catch fireflies,tell eachother scary stories,and build forts together in the backyard.Sometimes I miss those times,and wish he'd still be here to have those friday movie nights with me.
As I walked through the perplexity of the store,trying to find that God damn aisle, I bumped into one of walmarts employees.He had bleach blonde hair,that stuck out in different directions,capturing pale green eyes,and one of the most tallest guys I've seen,other than Calum.Also it seemed like he preferred the indoors,considering he was very pale.
"Oh my God! Im so sorry." I said noticing,I had bumped into him so hard,that the box he was carrying, had fallen to the floor.I immediately got on my knees,to help pick up the scattered bags of chips.
"It's fine..." He said picking them up as well,pursing his pink lips."...need any help?" He added now carrying the box.
"Well...actually...I'm having trouble finding aisle 9." I stammered on my sentence,distracted by his pale green eyes,which I found odd,and at the same time captivating.
His pink lips soon curved into a smirk,"the condums are straight down that way" he persuaded pointing to the left."then turn to your right" He added letting out a sigh furrowing his brow,causing his piercing to shine.
"I'm not lo--" I said getting cut off,by the boy who was being fresh.
"Yes you are...for your information,that aisle contains nothing but condums...and other sexual products." He said chuckling,his smile revealing his white teeth.
"It's none of you're business, you're just an employee." I bluntly said crossing my arms over my chest.
"Who is more than happy to help customers!" He said in a sarcastic manner,but seemed to be serious.
"You're so immature...Just mind your own goddamn business." I said rolling my eyes,now turning my heel to the direction,where aisle 9 was.
"You're welcome" He said chuckling once again,when I turned around to see if he was still there ....he was gone.
Once I found my way to aisle 9,I quickly grabbed a small pack of three Trojan condums,before the boy would soon show up,and catch me with the condums in hand.I wasted about 20 minutes instead of 5 minutes,which was aproximately the time I had planned in spending.Just looking at the label and drug facts of the pack,made me anxious.
There seemed to be no one attending any of the registers,I started to get nervous because,that boy I was talking to earlier,could show up any minute.Suddenly a boy,with blonde hair waved me over from a register,near the exit.As I started walking over,I noticed he was even taller than that other guy with the weird hair,he also had a fascinatinating pair of blue eyes.
"Hi...I didn't notice you were there." I said giving him a smile,his eyes were breathtaking...mine were just a splat of boring brown.
"Yeah me niether...I was too busy playing flappy bird on my phone." He said,his cheeks creasing dimples on each side when he smiled.He didn't seem to criticize the product I was purchasing,like that other guy.
"Anything else?" He said tightly smiling,reavealing a lip piercing on the left side of his lip.Which made him look more atracctive,than he already was.I noticed there was a whole shelf stocked with different brands of cigarette packs behind him.
"Can you please give me those two packs of Marlboro cigarettes?" I said pointing at the shelf.
"Which one?" He said now crossing his arms over his chest.
"Two packs of lights...thanks" I said noticing disapointment in his facial expression.
As he put both products into a bag, I heard foot steps walk towards the register.It was the guy with the weird hair,wearing only half a smile,once I turned around.He completely ignored the blank expression on my face,and slipped into the register,where the blonde haired boy stood.
"I'm working...you can save whatever you need to say later.Thanks..." The blonde quickly said not bothering to look at the boy,who was about to speak.
"Fine...then I'll just stare at you,untill you're done." The weird boy said blankly staring at him.
"Exactly..." The blonde said chuckling."That will be $19.50..." He said patiently eyeing me as I reached for the twenty dollar bill,stuffed inside my black jeans.
"Smoking is bad for you..." The weird boy said eyeing the pack of cigarettes I had in my hand.
"I know..." I Chuckled before exiting Walmart,through the automatic doors.
||I made this fanfiction because I fucking love Michael Clifford! Whose hyped for 5SOS DERPCON!!!! I AM. Good luck || <: >>>>>>> Vote because Mikey has great legs and teeth ! :)