Silence » a.i.

Ashton had all the answers to every question Bridgette had, but he had to stay silent for her own good. copyright © 2014 kwrites&luketivity

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32. Bad Dreams

I kept drifting in and out of sleep. I kept having dreams of Ashton. Most of them were of him covered in blood with his family or Jeremy or Michael laying at his feet - those were terrible. The other ones were of him smiling and laughing with me in my room, and he'd kiss me and tell me he loved me - those were even worse.

I slept in Jeremy's room while him and Michael stayed up watching TV together. They kept the volume low, but I liked hearing the noise of the TV. That would drift into my dreams and keep Ashton out of them.

"I'm sorry we told Bridgette." Michael said during one of the commercials. I had just woken up from yet another dream of Ashton and me. I was half awake but I tried hard to pay attention to what they were saying.

"I'm actually glad you did," Jeremy admitted. "I didn't know how to. And I knew how much she liked Ashton."

"And now look at her," Michael sighed. "Poor kid's torn apart because she left him."

"She's too stubborn to go back," Jeremy said. "That's the sad part."

Why was that sad? Was he implying he wanted me to go crawling back to the psycho that got him to kill himself? He wanted me to continue to be in love with a boy who killed over five people, including his family?

"Is it weird that I feel bad for freaking out at Ashton like that?" Michael wondered. It was odd hearing him use first names, but I knew it was just because he was talking to my brother - and actually being nice about it.

"I don't know," Jeremy said. "I mean, I understand that Ashton can get scary when he loses control of himself - he usually came around when he was like that. But on the other hand, it's still him that's doing it."

"I just can't help but feel bad for the kid."

"Do you think those other two are going to leave him too?"

"Ashton and Calum - he's the dark-haired kid with tan skin and looks like he's Asian - have been best friends for a while. Ashton was even engaged to his sister. I don't think he'd leave him. And Luke doesn't have much of a choice. Ashton's old house is gone so he has to stay there. He used to stay with me at my place after his memory was gone, but he knows he's not welcome there anymore."

"So, what if Calum and Luke do end up bailing?" Jeremy asked slowly.

"I don't know." he sighed.

There was a long pause before Jeremy spoke again. "Do you think Bridgette will be okay?"

"I hope so. She's probably heartbroken, but I think girls eventually get over it," he said. Bitterly, he added, "My girlfriend sure fucking did."

"But it was like things were different with Ashton," Jeremy told him. "Back at our old school, Bridge hardly ever showed interest in any boys. Then she comes back from her first day wandering Westfield Drive and she's already got heart eyes."

Did I really? I didn't think that I had fallen for Ashton already. Sure, I thought he was cute, but he didn't even say anything to me. He just stood there and stared.

"I have to admit, Cooper and Irwin had a connection even I'd never seen before," Michael agreed. "She could know what he was saying without a problem. And he was constantly with her. When he lost his memory, both of them were affected."

"So, do you thin she won't move on?" Jeremy quizzed.

Michael hummed to himself a little before answering. "I don't know if she wants to."



~*~



"Bridgette!" Michael and Jeremy were both shouting.

I jolted up, my breathing heavy as sweat dripped down my forehead. "W-what happened?"

"You were screaming." Michael told me, rubbing my back.

"Did you have a nightmare or something?" Jeremy questioned.

I thought back. I was back in the living room at Luke's - well, also my place now - and I had just told Ashton that I couldn't be with him anymore. Michael called to me as I began walking away, and I turned to face him. Instead of asking if he could come with me, though, he stared at me blankly and said, "You don't want to move on. You won't move on." Next thing I knew, I was trapped back in Luke's room. Instead of the lights flashing up to see Luke and Michael, I saw Lauren and Harry, shot straight in the face. Mrs Irwin laid by them, two bloody holes in her chest. Jeremy was sprawled out on the ground, blood and vomit pooling around him from his mouth. Michael was crumpled up on the floor like he was before, but this time, Ashton stood above him with his perfect smile on his face. I shuttered, burying my face in Jeremy's shirt.

"I don't want to talk about it." I groaned.

"C'mon, Bridgette. It'll make you feel better." Jeremy insisted.

"I'll never get over him." I mumbled into him.

"Way to go." I heard Jeremy try to discretely say to Mikey.

"It's not Michael that made me think it," I said, pushing away from him. "Okay, kind of. But I felt it. It hasn't even been a day and I can't take it. I'm having so many nightmares about him where he kills everyone, but I still can't not love him and I hate him and I hate myself."

"Cooper," Michael said softly. "You can't keep this up. It's only been a night and you're already a wreck. You can't sleep and this whole thing is just eating at you. Look, I'll take you over to Hemmo's and see if Irwin's around."

"No," I almost shouted. "I don't want to see him."

"Yes you do." Michael stated, crossing his arms because he knew he was right.

I just didn't want to get sucked back in. I knew I would once I saw him again, so I just had to avoid him for, well, the rest of my life. But I couldn't take these dreams already.

I ran my hands through my hair, staring down at my lap. "Alright, fine."

Michael grunted as he stood up, holding a hand out for me. I took it, telling Jeremy I'd be right back. Then I left with Michael, walking in silence like we had on the way over. Instead of going right in, Michael knocked on the door. Luke answered it, a lost look on his face.

"Why are you two here?" he wondered innocently.

"We need to see Irwin." Michael stated.

Luke stepped out of the way, letting Michael and I in. We went into the living room and sat down as Michael called for Ashton. He appeared on the other side of the room, sunglasses in place. Despite his glasses, it was obvious he had been crying.

"You want to talk to me?" Ashton asked, sounding surprised. His voice was hoars.

"Well, I wanted to apologize for freaking out the way I did," Michael said. "I understand that you didn't know what you were doing. Cooper, on the other hand..." he trailed off, waiting for me to say what I had to. But I didn't know what to say.

"Has she always been this terrible with words?" Luke wondered from his spot in the recliner, trying to lighten the mood.

Michael sighed. "Cooper's been having nightmares and basically can't seem to function without you. Given, it's only been less than twenty-four hours."

Ashton slid off his sunglasses, studying me. "Is that true?"

I shrugged. "I guess."

Ashton bit his lip. "I really am sorry, Bridgette. I was just lonely and I dind't want people to leave me. I didn't know what I was-"

"I know," I nodded. "And...I get it."

He smiled the smile I fell in love with. "Really?"

"Really." I nodded.

He appeared right in front of me, on both of his knees so he was just about level with my face. "So, you won't leave me?"

I cracked a smile, shaking my head. "No, I won't."

"Good," he said, his smile seeming to look off. I felt a sudden sharp pain in my stomach. I couldn't scream out or make any noise. I looked down to see Ashton had stabbed me. "Because you never can."



~*~



"Cooper, wake up!" Michael yelled, shaking me harshly.

I was already sitting up when my eyes flashed open. I could feel the sweat on my body and my heart beating a hundred miles an hour. I was sitting up between Michael's legs on Jeremy's bed. I looked around the room, making sure I was actually in Jeremy's room. Then I looked down at where my hands held my stomach. No blood; no knife.

"What happened?" he asked, sounding worried.

I groaned, laying my head back against his shoulder. I didn't even know what to say, so I just moved so I just pulled Mikey down into a laying position and tried to fall asleep again, knowing I'd probably just end up getting startled awake because of another nightmare about Ashton.









okay so basically the entire middle part was a dream. and just to clear things up bridgette isn't dead. basically, it's just her and calum that are alive. well, and her parents and calum's family, but as far as main characters go, it's just them.

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