Chapter Eighteen p.1
“You Ready?!” Harry calls from downstairs. I roll my eyes and zip up my overnight bag making sure that I’ve got all my necessities. So today is the day. Harry and I are on our way to go pick up Louis, El and Lux. Lux stayed with Eleanor last night so that Harry could have time to ‘get ready’ for today. Personally I think it was just an excuse to not have to look after the child for the night. I sigh and grab my phone walking out of the door. I close my bedroom door behind me and make my way down the stairs, bag over my shoulder.
“Hurry up, God damnit London.” Harry groans and I huff aloud. He’s been cranky and uptight since Louis left his place last night around 10. After he was gone Harry just brought me home and left. Luckily for me my father was out on a stakeout last night and my mother had double night shifts at the hospital so I was alone with my thoughts for the evening. Only to be woken up at 6 in the morning by a arsehole of a Harry.
“Sorry.” I mutter and walk past him out the door, waiting for him to pull it close behind him. I hear his feet shuffling behind me as I walk silently to his car and pull open my door, not bothering to wait for him to do it for me. He yanks his door open and roughly slams it shut. I jolt with the loud sound and place my bag down by my feet, waiting for Harry to start the engine and take us to El’s.
-4 HOURS LATER-
“Harry?” I groan and turn around to face London. She’s standing about three or four feet away from me in a floral dress and soft sweater over it, her feet covered in white knee high socks and she looks like an innocent school girl and I’d be lying if I said that it doesn’t make me fucking hot for her.
“What?” I growl trying to refrain myself from lashing out at her. It’s not my fault I’m being a dick to her though, but I just can’t stop playing out different scenarios of how tonight could possibly go and they all end the same. I watch as London takes a step back from me now leaning against the wall and she bites her lips as if to nervous that if she said something wrong, I might just explode on her.
“Why are you being like this?” She asks barely audible that I nearly ask her to repeat herself, but decide against it and run my hands through my hair, sighing as I do this. I’m about to reply to the brown haired girl, but she beats me to it and continues “Did I do something wrong? I’m sorry if I did I ju-“ She starts rambling and I step forward, grabbing her face between my two hands and I make her look into my eyes. She takes a deep breath and I lean down to place my forehead against hers.
“You did nothing wrong, love. I’m just… Stressed.” I tell her softly. Her eyes are closed as I speak words of adoration to her and telling her that she’s not the one to blame, but that I am. A small nod from her tells me that she’s okay and I let go of her. I start to make my way out of the room and to the living room area of the cabin, but her soft voice stops me dead in my tracks.
“Do you not- do you not like me anymore?” She asks me just above a whisper and my eyes widen at the idea that she could even let this pass her thoughts “Is that it? If it is then just tell me please, because I-“
“London.” I breath and she stops speaking. Without turning around to face her I let the next words leave my lips. “Just shut the fuck up already.” I spin around and I push her against the wall which she’s leaning on. I take a sharp intake of air and kiss her lips forcefully, trying to put as much passion into the kiss as possible to rid her head of these torturing thoughts.
All too soon we’re interrupted by the clearing of a throat. I pull my lips away from London’s, but keep our bodies flat against each others, showing her I’m still here. I look to see Louis standing in the door of the single bed bedroom we’re in and just by the look he gives me I know what’s coming.
“Zayn just texted. It’s time to go.”
I sit across from Eleanor at the hardwood table and blow on my hot tea. It’s been nearly five hours since the boys left and by now I have this tainted feeling that something bad has happened to them. Although Eleanor has been reassuring me that they’ll be fine, I just can’t help but feel as if my mind would finally be put to ease once I see Harry walking into the front without a scrape on his beautiful body.
“London!” I snap out of my thoughts and look at Eleanor, frowning.
“What?” I ask her. She shakes her head smiles at me.
“They’re here.” I jump out of the stool faster than I can think and I’m rushing towards the door in seconds, pulling the wood open and immediately I’m crushed in a hug, my body nearly tumbling backwards as Harry’s arms engulf me in a hug. I know it’s my curly haired bad boy by the scent of body spray filling my nostrils and I can’t help but pull him closer to me, whispering in his ear.
“I’m so glad you’re okay.”
Harry and I walk into my house and I set my overnight bag down on the ground beside the front door. I wait for Harry to follow me into the kitchen, but he stays put by the door. I frown and look at him with a puzzled expression.
“There’s something I have to tell you.” He says and my stomach drops. Oh no, things like this never end well on the movies. I move slightly more towards him and he takes a slow breath, exhaling heavily. “It’s over.” He lets out.” At first I don’t quite know what he’s saying, but as soon as the reality of his words set in, I slide backwards on the carpet.
“Wh-what do you mean? What’s over?” I ask him, hoping that he’ll deny my suspicions, but when he doesn’t reply me, I know that I was right and that my thoughts had been confirmed. “Get out.” I mutter and grit my teeth, not sure if I’m trying to keep my anger under control or try and keep my tears inside.
“Look London you have to understand that I’m doing this f-“
“Get out!” I stop him from finishing his sentence and I push at his chest to try and get him out of my house, but he clutches my arms in his hands and makes me look at him.
“I’m doing this for you.” He whispers. I shake my head and rip my arms from his grasp. Once again I push at his shoulders and he stumbles back with my force, but not enough to push him out of the door. “Just listen to me, this is for the best and-“
“How is this for the best?! How is hurting me for the best?!” The first tear escapes my eye and from then there’s no stopping. “Just get out Harry!” I scream and he opens his mouth to speak, but closes it just as fast and nods slowly, turning on his heels to walk out of my house, taking my heart with him. As soon as he’s out, I slam the door shut behind him and fall down in a heap against it. I bring my knees up to my chest and I cry. I don’t know for how long I cry, but I do.
For a moment I question why I was crying this bad over a boy who’s just broken me when I realize that I didn’t just like him.
I don’t just care about him.
I love him.
I am in love with Harry Styles and he’s just left me with nothing. He ripped through my chest and clawed my heart into pieces, leaving me to place them back together when only he can.