I panicked not knowing what to do. I decided to tell Cloud, despite his mood.
"Uhh... Cloud?" I asked him.
"Yes, Jess?" he answered not bothering to look up from his phone as we still sat at another red light. Jess.... he said Jess. He usually calls me Jessizzie because she likes "funky" names.
I decided to ask him if he was alright before taking my needs first, "Are you alright?"
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"You called me 'Jess'," I said eyeing him curiously.
"Is that not your name?" he said coldly. His response hit me like daggers. I couldn't believe he said that. First I lose my diary then my only friend gives me the cold shoulder. I just had to run. I zipped up my backpack and zoomed out his back door.
"Jess!" I heard him yell. He got out his car then started running after me. Yes, he did catch up to me. One of the perks of being the captain of the football team.
"What has gotten into you?" He held me by my shoulders, I couldn't move. He was so
"I'm leaving the world. I will take my body and let it die some where," I said a tear forming in my eye.
"Now why would you want to do that?" he asks. His grip loosened as I stopped trying to escape. He put his hand on my face, wiping the tear away with his thumb.
"No one likes me, not even you," I said looking at the ground, sniffling now.
"Jess," he began to say,"I'm sorry, I was just upset about Janet and I's break up."
When he does say my name its meant to be serious, not to just flat out say it. Then I thought about the last part of his response, "I was just upset about Janet and I's break up". He finally broke up with her after 4 months of me being tortured just because I was his friend. Well, I would have rather him stayed with her this time. I was the reason they broke up. So, I was ready for that torture to be on a daily basis.
He was now hugging me, proving that he was truly sorry. Then we began to walk back to his car that has two open doors with cars honking and going around his vehicle. His arm was around my shoulder and I was smiling. Of course he was taller than me, so I had to look up to his to see his face, and face wasn't smiling like mine. I then felt cloudy again. I pulled my backpack back into the backseat of his car.
"I lost my diary," I said as he began to drive again.
"Jess, why didn't tell me sooner?" he looked in the rear view mirror.
I know why he used my real name. I tell him about my diary all the time. I tell him why I guard it with my life, I tell him why I write in it, I just don't tell him what I write in it. He never asked, he always did let me keep my personal space even though I am usually on his heels all the time. Hey, he's my only friend, what else could I do?
"Do you know where you could have lost it?" He asked turning a corner slower than a turtle. Did he just really ask that question? He picked me up, I had it. I know he noticed that I had it because he got my backpack off my shoulders by pulling it out of my arm then sliding it back in. I have been ever since we left about 10 minutes ago. I decided to shake off his question and just answer as if the question really needed to be asked.
"In school," I said nonchalantly, "I had it right before I accidentally ran into Janet." I noticed Cloud wince at her name. *Note to self* Never mention Janet. I don't even know why he so upset about her. All she did was kiss him in school, I was with him most of the time, and she never came with.
"We'll go back, I know how much that diary means to you, Jess," He made a U-turn and were on our way.