I been talking to Lou, She told me that they are done in the USA. They are coming back to London soon. I’m worry they will find me, I can’t face them. It’s been a year since; I left the boys, since my mom’s death. I miss all the boys even the girls. We were all family. I got up and got ready to walk around London its sunny out to day. (haven_looks/ ) I put that on, got my key to my small flat and left. I walked down to the café, to eat some food before walking around. I got to the café, josh was working. He is a cool dude, he flirts with me but I’m not going to flirt back. He reminds me of harry. Josh has brown wavy hair and dark blue eyes. I smile walking up to him “Hey josh how are you doing?”I ask “hey cutie I’m good do you want your normal?” he asked. “Yes thanks “I say as I walk away to a table. I sit down and look around the café. I come here every other day. After 10mins josh come over to give me my hot coca, toast &eggs. “So cutie do you want out tonight?” josh asked like every time I come. I roll my eyes “no josh I got plans.” I reply. He laughs “come on what plans do you have?” he question me. “I’m hanging with Lou& lux tonight.” I lied “oh okay then I’ll see you cutie.” He say as he walks away to help a new person. I laugh shaking my head at how he believes that lie, oh well. I ate my food, my mind would wonder to the green eyed boy, I left a year ago I wonder if they think or at least harry.
We are on a flight back to London from USA. I still think about that blue eyed girl. I wonder if she’s seen the pictures over the year. Since she been gone something change in me, I may have had a few or a lot of one night stands. I do get wasted a bit. I miss her. I know she had a reason to leave, but I don’t get why. Why couldn’t she just say goodbye at least. I ask that question everyday for the pass year. “Harry we are about to land.” Liam says as he pokes the back of my head. I smile and turn to see Dani asleep on Niall’s shoulder. I look over at Liam and raise my eyebrow. “I had to lay her on Niall so I could poke you.” He said. I looked back at Dani. Her and Liam’s relationship is so pure and strong. I want that, I want that with Haven! Liam broke me out of my thoughts “We will find her harry I mean we are back in London for a while before the tour starts.” I just nodded. You see haven left right as the take me home was almost done recorded. I smiled sadly at my mate. I hope we see her again the plane landed… we got off and it was noon-ish. So we went to our flats, we were going to walk around London. I hope this is going to be fun!
I was walking around shops that the boys took me to. I walked in to the guitar store that Niall took me to one time. It was really funny since we stay there for awhile play the guitars and sing the guy that owns the store doesn’t mine.
Me and the boys &girls walked around some shops we took Haven to before… I think we are trying to move on but I know for a fact we can’t! We all love her to much to do that. i saw the guitar store and I smiled. “Hey guys I’m going to the guitar store” I told them as I walked to it. “Okay” they said all together. I walked in and looked at some guitars. I saw a girl with blonde hair playing a guitar. I knew what she was playing it was torn, she sounded just like Haven…
I thought I saw a girl brought to life She was warm, she came around, she was dignified Showed me what it was to cry You couldn't be that girl I adored You don't seem to know or seem to care what your heart is for But I don't know her anymore
There's nothing left, I used to cry My conversation has run dry That's what's going on Nothing's fine I'm torn
I'm all out of is how I feel I’m cold and I am shamed Lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed Into something real I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn You're a little late I'm already torn There's nothing left I used to cry Inspiration has run dry That's what's going on Nothing's fine I'm torn Nothing's fine I'm torn
I'm all out of faith This is how I feel I'm cold and i am shamed Lying broken on the floor
Illusion never changed Into something real I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn You're a little late I'm already torn Torn Oh torn
The girl wiped her face, she had been crying. She got up and put the guitar away. She turned her head this away I swear it was haven but haven had dark brown hair last time I saw her. But this girl like so much alike to her. I was she looked at me a blinked a few times. I had a snap back and sunglasses on. I wanna to cry, she looked like her. I shake my head and walk over to the music books. She walks by me to leave, I wanna stop and ask her who she is but I know it not her. I think my mind is going crazy now I know how harry felt the 1st few months of having haven missing… I just shake my head to get the thought of her out.
When I was singing it felt good. I played Torn the 1st song Niall showed me on guitar. When I stopped playing there was a guy he looked to be my age or a bit older. I missed those guys so much but especially harry. I missed his curly hair, his smile, but mainly I missed his presence right next to me, a presence that should always be with me. But they would never forgive me, for living if only I would have explained told them the reason why I left so drastically. It would be ironic if I were to see the guys, but nah that wouldn’t happen...... WAIT! Is that Niall?? He had the same snap back as him, but it couldn’t be him could it? He couldn’t be here shopping, but maybe I was wrong maybe it was him! No.... I can’t get my hopes up... I shake my head and just walk around. I look over at a couple on the steps by a flower shop. The weird thing is the girl has pink tip and blonde at the top of her head, kinda like Perrie… nah I’m just going crazy. Haha just like the time me and the girls had a sleepover, craziness all over Perrie’s place. But anyways the guy next to the girl looks like Zayn, like the style he wears, the bad boy look. I think knowing the boys are here is making me go crazy… yup that’s it. I miss the way Zayn always helped me when I needed someone to talk to about things. I know he’d know what to say about my mother’s death. I see them looking at me, then I realized I was staring at them… Wow I’m so smart. I smile at them, the girl smiles and waves at me. The boy just a small sad smile, He looks like he is going to cry maybe they broke up or bad news I don’t know. I looked away from them. I thought of a good place to go. I know the park, I started to walk to the park but I turn to look at the couple. The girl was hugging and rubbing the boy’s arm. I wonder what happen. No haven! It’s not your job remember don’t let anyone get close. You already had to leave great friend, wait they were never friends they were family. I sighed and started to walk to the park. I need to clear my head.
Me and Perrie went by a flower shop, just to sit and think and take everything in. it’s the 1st time in a while we have all been home together. I think we all have one girl on our minds. Me and Perrie started to talk about how the tour is going to go when she is going to visit and so what. Perrie pointed out that a girl was staring she said maybe it’s a fan. Perrie being Perrie she smiled and waved the girl smiled back. But I looked at the girl she had blonde hair and blue eyes just like haven, she looked just like her. But I don’t know her. I smile sadly at her. I still can’t get over haven leaving. Perrie saw me and hug saying “if you love something let it go if it come back it ours.” I smiled bigger and a bit happier. I kissed Perrie’s check and asked if she wanted lunch and we went to this café, near all the shops.
I started to walk to the park as I was going to the park, I saw a couple like Dani & Liam gosh I miss mommy D and daddy D. they made sure everyone was good. I shake my head, for them. I keep walking. Till I got to the park, I walked into the park. I saw kids running around and playing. I walked around the park for a while. As I walked by the swings I swear I saw Louis and Eleanor. I just keep thinking I see the boys and girls. I roll my eyes I pull out my phone and text Lou “hey Lou I think I’m going crazy I think I keep seeing the boys.” I sent that to Lou and started to walk about to my place. I was going to eat some dinner when I got home. I went to my Flat and made some pasta for dinner. i ate dinner then change in to this ( /parrkks/ ) I sat down and waited till it got dark out to go back to the park to look at the star, something me and harry used to do. I smiled remember in December we went to the park it started to snow and we started to sing the song by Demi and Joe sing my song for you. I just let all the memories of these 5 boys come back to me.
Me and all the boys and girls went out to a pizza place. We all sat talking about tour and other things. My mind would wonder off to this time me and haven walked in the park it started to snow. I smiled at the thought of her. All of the guys and girl got ready to go after we ate. “Harry mate you want a ride?”Niall asked me “no I’m fine I’m just going to walk around” I smile at my blonde mate. They walk to their cars, waved as they drove off. I let my feet take me to a place I know so well. It was this big park me and haven used to love to go. I smile. Even after a year I’m still madly in love with that girl. If I don’t lover her then who would? Who would ever understand her like I do? I don’t know anyone that would. I would give up everything just to see her again! I got to the park I start to just walk around
Third person’s p.o.v
Little did haven and harry know that they were in the same park at the same time. They would never know too, to blind to see they have walked by each other. Blinded by brokenness from each other, little did they know their paths would meet again, just when they need it? As each song they hear reminds them of each other, they get close to meet up but never see. As they walk by each other, wishing to see each other again Lou has a plan to help them. Both Haven and all the boys can’t believe they are back in London.