My sleep was uninterrupted. I didn’t toss and turn until the dream. I was in the woods and I was running. I must have been in wolf form because I could hear Jacob’s thoughts and they were scaring me. “Run faster. Just get away from her. Come on legs move.” I was running at full speed or at least what I thought was full speed. I had Jacob’s scent then a familiar scent that I was following. “Jake who’s chasing you?” I kept running through the moon lit woods. I could hear the thudding as he ran away from whatever was chasing him. I caught sight of a blur of blue, brown, red and green. I wasn’t quite sure what it was then it dawned on me. It was a vampire. Panic set in. There was a vampire after my Jacob. I tried to faster it seemed like my legs just slowed down.
I could hear him again, “Please don’t kill me. I’m your friend. I love you.”
I was starting to catch up to them which meant they were slowing down. Before I realized it we were at the edge of the cliffs. I saw Jacob inches from the edge. There was a female with long brown hair flowing in the breeze. Her green shirt was pale in the moonlight against her blue jeans. I growled loudly at her. That’s when I saw the moonlight shine against her red eyes. She turned to look at me and this snarl came from her. Then I recognized her. It was Bella. She was a vampire, a newborn.
Jacob’s thoughts were racing, “Please don’t hurt me Bella. I’m your best friend. Bella I love you.” Jacob whimpered.
I’ve never heard him whimper or plead like this. This growl came from Bella, “Friend? I beg to differ. You’re a mutt. A filthy, mangy mutt. Edward was right about you.”
Jacob was so hurt. I could hear his thoughts and I cringed. I watched as he let his head fall and look at the ground.I growled loudly at her. She whipped around and looked at me, “Who do you think you are growling at?”
I growled louder and within a second she had her arms around Jakes neck. His thoughts were all jumbled together with, fear, chaos, panic, anger, and hurt. I moved closer and she tightened her grip. How could a Jake let her do this to him. He was a strong wolf and he couldn’t break free of her grip.
“Leah back off.” Bella spoke.
I decided I couldn’t let her hurt him. I lunged at her my teeth sinking into her arm.
I was thrown like a rag doll. I got back up and ran at her when I heard the snap, and then the, THUD! She let just let his body fall to the ground. It was like he meant nothing to her. She just looked at me, “He’d be alive if you’d only listened and backed off. Oh well now you can blame yourself for this death.” She was gone in an instant.
I startled awake screaming, “JACOB!”
My mom came running in my room, “Leah what’s wrong?”
I sat up panting covered in sweat. “Jacob, where is he? Is he ok? She didn’t hurt him did she?” I was so panicked.
My mom brushed the hair out of my face, “Sweetie he’s fine. He called really early this morning before you woke up to check on you. I told him your were fine and that you were asleep. He said he’d call later and maybe try and stop by.”
I looked at the clock 2:45pm. I slept the whole day away, “Oh man.”
My mom smiled, “It’s ok hun. Billy is in the living room. He came over to visit for a bit. He wanted to check up on you also. Seth’s been picking on you again while you slept. He said, Charlie received a noise disturbance call from your snoring. Then he asked who left a motor boat in the house. He finally gave up about an hour ago.”
I rolled my eyes, “How nice.”
She just smiled, “Let me go make you some lunch. Go take a shower and get cleaned up. I will leave some fresh towels on the toilet for you.” my mom left the room and I slowly got to my feet.
Inside the bathroom on the toilet were the towels like she promised. I shut the door and turned on the hot water and started the shower. The bathroom fogged as I slid out of my clothes, letting them land on the floor in a pile. I stood there and washed up. After I was clean I leaned against the shower wall. The hot water trickled along my skin not phasing me. There was a light knock on the door,
“Leah, your lunch is on the table.”
I shut off the water and opened the curtain, “Ok mom.” I grabbed my towels drying off and threw them in the hamper and grabbed my bathrobe off the back of the door and tied it around me.
I slipped quietly across the hall into my room and shut the door. I rummaged through my drawers finding a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and pulled a gray hooded sweat shirt out of my closet and was dressed in seconds. I sat down on my bed and looked at the picture of my dad and I sitting on my desk. I was happy and smiling and so was he. I heard the wind chimes hanging by the front door sing softly. I could hear my dad whispering, “Leah be the strong woman you are. Have the courage The Third Wife did. I’m always with you.”
I looked around my room and nobody was there. Mean while out in the living room Seth sat on the floor, my mom was curled up on the couch and Billy was beside the couch.
“So how is she doing? She still sounds out of it when she was talking.” Seth remarked.
“She’s getting better. It’s going to take a few days for her to come around.” my mom smiled at Seth and fiddled with her wedding band.
“I’m glad she and Jacob have forged such a good friendship.They seem to understand one another.” Billy smiled.
I let my head fall back against the wall. Seth was standing in front of me. I never heard him come in, “Hey come on out and eat.” he smiled putting out a hand for me to get up.
I moved to the edge of the bed and stood up taking his hand. “Let me know if you don’t think you can make it ok. I will get mom.”
I smiled at him, “Thanks.”
I slowly walked to the dining room and sat down and ate half of the sandwich she made me.
I ate quietly while Seth sat there watching me. “You all done?”
I nodded, “Yeah.”
Seth took the other half of the sandwich and within seconds it was gone he wasn’t even chewing. “Thanks.” he smiled.
I pushed away from the table and stood up grabbing the plate putting it in the sink.
I walked out to the living room and laid down on the couch resting my head on my mom’s lap. “Hello sweetie. How was your lunch?”
I spoke softly, “Good. Thank you.” She smiled and gently brushed the hair from my face.
“I ate the other half she didn’t want.” Seth said plopping himself down in a chair.
“So I was hoping we could have a nice afternoon. Maybe talk a little bit. No arguments. Nobody getting upset and leaving. Calmly talking about stuff.”
My mom smiled and looked down at me. “Well I think the big question is how are you doing Leah? We mean overall. You haven’t said much since your dad died. I know your very angry. It’s quite understandable.”
I closed my eyes and swallowed hard before I spoke, “You never realize how much you truly miss someone and love them until they’re no longer here to talk to. It sucks.” a few tears slipped down my cheek and Seth handed me a tissue.
“I agree with Leah. It’s weird not having him around. Being able to talk to him. Hearing his laugh. It’s still strange.”
My mom smiled, “I miss his smile. I miss the talks before we fell asleep at night.”
Billy nodded, “I miss his home made Fish Fry.”
We all laughed as Billy tried to cheer us all up.
“I want to apologize for putting away dad’s things. It makes it easier to not see his stuff around. I think I find it easier to think that he’s off fishing. I think he’s spending time with Charlie. I’m not ready to accept that he won’t ever walk through that door again. It’s been easier for me to be angry and just be numb towards everything.”
My mom smiled, “I’m so glad your being honest with us. This means a lot. It’s going to be tough. Don’t blame yourself for what happened. It’s not your fault. I’m a nurse and there was nothing I could do. Everyone has their time and it was his. It sounds harsh but it’s reality.”
I sat up and up wiped away the tears that were now falling down my cheek. Seth came over and hugged me tightly.
“I just wonder why him. He was supposed to see me get married. Walk me down the aisle.” then I looked down.
“Leah I know. He’ll always be with you in spirit.” Billy spoke and I nodded.
It must have been around 6:00pm when there was a knock on the door.
“I’ll get it.” Seth was off the couch and opened the door, “Hey Charlie what’s up?” Seth grinned and moved out of the way letting Charlie in.
“Hey everyone. I wanted to come by and check on Leah. So I see your up. How are you feeling?”
I shrugged, “Ok. Just tired.”
He smiled. “So Bella broke her hand today.” everyone looked and raised an eyebrow.
“How did she do that?” my mom was concerned.
“Well I guess Jacob kissed her and she punched him in the face. Edward came by and picked her up to have her checked out by Dr.Cullen. It was pretty swollen when she left. All I know is Jacob and Edward were outside talking for a few minutes before they left. Jacob left after they did. I’m not sure where he went.”
I sighed, “Wow. So is Jacob ok?” I was curious.
Charlie laughed, “Oh he’s fine. Not even a scratch on that kid.”
Billy shook his head, “My son learned his lesson I hope.”
Charlie shrugged, “Who knows. Probably. They’re young. All I know is he went outside and talked with Edward. They both stayed very calm.”
I was dying to know what the leech said to Jake.
The days passed rather uneventfully. I took that as a blessing. I didn’t have to hear the pack’s thoughts about their imprints, or whatever it may be. I was free. I stayed around the house. Then when my mom went to town to run a few errands I tagged along. The house would just get too quiet. Sunday afternoon Jacob called and informed me to get ready he was coming over. I had already been up for a while when I headed out to the living room. He came by and picked me up and we headed down to the beach.
“So Bella broke her hand punching me in the face.” he grinned.
I just burst out laughing, “Yeah Charlie told us. What was up with that. Did you make fun of her leech again and she lost it?”
Jacob shook his head, “No. I confessed my feelings. Told her how I truly felt about her and the decisions she was making. I took the opportunity and kissed her. Well she didn’t like it and bang then a crunch and she yelped.”
I tried to fight back the grin, “Wow humans will never understand. Well at least she doesn’t.”
We sat down on a piece of drift wood, “So she’s graduating tomorrow. Invited me to her party. The psychic leech is throwing it for her.”
I raised an eyebrow, “Well are you going to go? I wouldn’t. I think it’s walking on dangerous ground. You’ll be in a house full of leeches.”
He looked at me, “I’m not sure. She’s my friend. This may be the last time I get to see her.”
I huffed, “Your funeral dude. Just realize that.”
He looked at me, “Leah they won’t hurt me. There will be other people there from her school I assume.”
I shook my head, “What if one of the Cullen's get hungry. I doubt they can control themselves. Savages.”
Jacob straightened up, “What’s up with you and the remarks. I’m not going to be a meal for them. Quite frankly they smell horrible to me. I probably don’t smell that much better to them.”
I was trying to stay calm.
“You have nothing to worry about.” I looked down at the sand below my feet, “You don’t understand. Jacob none of us can save you. We’d have no idea if you were in trouble.”
Jacob smiled, “Leah trust me. I will be fine. She won’t let anything happen to me. She cares about me too much.”
I stood up and looked down at him, “Who are you kidding! Please if she cared about you she’d re-consider her choice. She’d leave him and be with you. She wouldn’t sit there and lead you on. She wants to become our ENEMY JACOB! What don’t you get about that?!”
Jacob stood up and looked at me, “What’s your problem Leah? You're so huffy about all of this.”
I felt my face turn red, “Because she’s hurting you. She doesn’t care. I’ve heard your thoughts. I know how you feel. She’s a heartless person. She’s a selfish BITCH.”
The words escaped me and I covered my mouth. Jacobs eyes went wide, “Excuse me. Look who’s talking. We all have to relive the anger and hatred you have towards Sam for hurting you, and being with Em. Get over it. He’s imprinted on her.”
I was so angry now I balled up my fists. It took all the strength I had not to hit Jacob, “I... I thought you were my friend.” I shoved past him and walked home.
Once I was inside the house I went to my room.
“Well hello to you too.” Seth said.
My mom poked her head out of the kitchen, “What did you say?”
He looked at her, “Leah just came in and went to her room.”
My mom walked down the hallway to my room lightly knocking on the door, “Leah, can I come in?”
I laid on my bed my face buried into my pillow. It was wet from me crying. The door handle slowly turned and the door opened. She walked over and sat down on the edge of my bed,
“Sweetie what’s wrong. Talk to me.”
My face was burning hot. I was so angry and crying didn’t help. I rolled over to my back and looked at her, “Oh hun why are you crying?”
I sat up slowly, “I don’t feel good.” I was off my bed in the bathroom with my face over the toilet. My sides ached from being sick. I was all sweaty.
My mom rubbed my back and called out to Seth, “Seth, can you please help me out. I need you to come here. Your sister is sick.”
He tossed the remote on the couch and was in the doorway in seconds, “What do you need me to do?”
My mom looked up, “I need you to fix her bed so she can just lay down. So pull down the blankets. Also grab a bucket for her and a small glass of water on her night stand.” he nodded and disappeared.
“I’m sorry mom.”
She smiled and continued rubbing my back. “Leah shh. Don’t apologize hun. You’ve probably picked up some bug. If you think your all done let’s get you to bed.”
I slowly stood up and she flushed the toilet and walked with me to my room.
“Just lay down hun and get some sleep.” she shut off the light and left my room, leaving the door open just a crack.
The night passed quietly. I stirred a few times. At one point I cracked open my bedroom window. The cool night air felt nice against my hot skin. I grabbed the small glass of water and sipped it. It felt so good on my dry lips. I finished it and laid back down. Tonight I could hear the waves of the ocean. I focused on it and found myself unable to fight the heaviness that was now apparently taking over my eyelids. I gave in and fell back to sleep. The next day was uneventful. Jacob must be stressed because it was finally Bella’s graduation day. It meant she was becoming one of them very soon. The day passed quietly and I spent most of it in my room. Seth had gone out and my mom was cleaning. By the time dinner as ready Seth had just come home.
“Go wash up. Dinner’s ready.” my mom smiled as I came out and sat down.
I was waiting for dinner. It smelled delicious. She had made lasagne. Finally Seth was at the table along with my mom and we dug in. There wasn’t much dinner talk and I’m not quite sure why. I wasn’t complaining. After dinner we all made our way to the living room. My mom and Seth were laughing at whatever was on the tv. I sat there quietly writing in my journal.
Well I don’t know where my life’s going. Things are so out of place. I don’t know who I am. I used to be a normal girl with a normal life. I realize that we all wear masks to hide our true selves from others. I’m sitting there putting on this tough persona which isn’t me. I’m dying inside. I’m so lonely. I have nobody to confide in. I know I can talk to Jacob but he has his own issue’s right now. I used to be able to tell Emily anything but that’s gone. I think I’m going to put a lock on my heart so nobody can ever hurt me again. I realized everything takes time. With time comes knowledge and closure. When will it happen for me. I noticed a small quote from Lao Tzu at the bottom of the page, “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” Well I guess all my strength has been stolen from me. My courage I’m not quite to sure about. I blew up on Jake and I didn’t mean to. I was never like this before. I wish I could erase the memories of Sam and I. Be able to say I’ve moved on, but it’s all coming back when I’m alone. I can’t believe I’m still in love with him and I hate it.
My mom was getting tired and dozed off on the couch beside me. Seth flipped to something else on the tv. I shut my journal and set it on the coffee table. It was late that’s all I knew when there was a knock on the door. Jacob, Quil and Embry were standing there when I opened it,
“Uh hi.” Jacob spoke with no emotion to his voice, “Sam needs us all tonight. That includes Seth.”
I raised and eyebrow, “Why’s that?”
Jacob just looked at me, “While I was at Bella’s party, well I was told about these vampires that are after Bella. Anyways I told Sam and he’s asked me to let everyone else know. We’re meeting up with them at 3:00am.”
I was confused, “Uh with who?”
Jacobs jaw clenched, “The Cullen’s.”
I shook my head, “Whoa no way. Listen you can hang with them. I will do nothing that endangers my life.”
Seth chimed in quickly, “Hey I’m game. I will see you later.”
Jacob smirked at me and left with Quil and Embry. I shut the door and looked at Seth and shook my head. I gently nudged my mom and told her about Sam’s orders and she nervously agreed.
Seth and I left together and went into the woods and stripped from our clothing tying it to our legs and we phased. I made sure to shut off all my thoughts.
Seth on the other hand was like a teenage girl. “Oh my god I’m in wolf form. I’m with the pack. This is so cool. Oh wow.”
I shook my head and walked up beside him and we went to find Sam. When we met up with the others they were snickering,
“A little excited are we Seth?” Quil thought.
Seth nodded up and down. Collin and Brady stayed quiet. They’re thoughts were racing. I’m not quite sure who was thinking what. They we’re uneasy. We came up on the clearing and stayed hidden within the trees. The Cullen’s were already there waiting.
The leader spoke, “Welcome.”
Sam thought, “Thank you.”
The male standing beside Bella spoke Sam’s thoughts. The mind reader I realized. Sam’s thoughts were there again, “We will watch and listen, but no more. That’s the most we can ask of our self control.”
Carlisle nodded. They continued to speak to one another using the the leech beside Bella to translate. We were told how the newborns were different from the Cullen’s. We stood silently watching two of the males get ready to show us how to fight the newborns. Carlisle moved out of the way and Jasper took over speaking, “Emmett is like a newborn. He relies on his strength.”
Emmett charged at Jasper but never caught him.
“Wow he’s impulsive like Paul.” Jared thought.
The rest of us grinned.
“Shut up.” Paul thought back.
Seth gave a mental grin, “I think Leah is like the blonde female. They both seem to be bitchy and hate everything.”
There were snickers through all of their thoughts. I growled a little. Edward smirked slightly.
“How about all of you shut up.” I thought in a nasty tone.
Sam thought, “Calm down now. You’re wolves, not puppies.”
I thought back, “There are a few in this group that are.”
Paul’s thoughts were loud, “Yeah like your brother and you Leah.”
Seth whined a little, “I’m not a puppy. I’m just a young wolf.”
Paul kept going, “Keeping telling yourself that. Your sister is like a Doberman Pincher.”
They all snickered and a grin was on Edward’s face.
“Well at least I have manners and don’t lick myself in the company of others pooch.”
Paul growled and Jacob fought back a grin.
“Leah stop it now.” Sam thought in a stern tone.
“What the hell? You don’t get after them for giving me a hard, but it’s ok for them to do it to me.”
Sam’s thoughts were quiet for a moment, “Leah I did ask them to calm down.”
I was furious, “Oh wow all mighty alpha. Want an award? Oh wait maybe a true alpha should get it, maybe Jacob?” the thought was harsh.
“Enough Leah!” Sam was trying to keep calm.
“No it’s not enough. You push us around and we’re supposed to kiss your ass because your in charge. I hate you so much.”
Embry didn’t think anything.
Quil was next, “Leah please don’t get so upset. Paul doesn’t know when to stop.”
Paul thought, “She’s just a piece of over emotional baggage in this pack.”
Sam sighed, “Stop it now the two of you.”
Paul growled, “Sticking up for her Sam. Real smooth.”
Sam thought, “Paul shut it now. I’m not sticking up for her.”
I was angry, “That’s right Paul he won’t stick up for me. I’m not Emily. I’m not scarred physically, only emotionally because of him.”
Sam’s thoughts went blank.
“Damn Leah.” Jared thought.
I let my thoughts wander and started wondering if it was Quil, Sam’s or Jacob’s father who got stepped out of line and was with Embry’s mom. They shifted uncomfortably.
“Leah stop it now.” Sam thought.
I thought back, “Oh no Sam. I’m just getting started.” I started paying attention again to the the Cullen’s. I sat there picturing Emily’s scared face and I could tell Sam was wincing because his thoughts just went quiet.
The movement was so fluid. It was rather interesting watching them. They moved quicker than any human ever could. They finished and Jasper had a short female who looked like a pixie come forward. She danced around quietly never being caught. Bella was on edge. Her body language gave it away. The male and short female were finished. All of the sudden the small female replaced the males position beside Bella.
“I’ve got my eye on you, Bella.” the small female said.
I thought that was strange. We stood watching quietly. The training had finally wrapped up and I was glad, “Finally.” I thought.
Sam thought it would be good if we got to know each of the Cullen’s scents. The hackles on the back of my neck stood up. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a feather. Jacob was right behind Sam. I wanted to get this over with. Jacob grinned and looked more like the hyena from the Lion King with his tongue hanging out to one side than a strong wolf. He was so happy to see Bella. I restrained my thoughts because her leech was right there. I didn’t feel like getting into a fight with Sam or the Cullen’s. We stood there while Jacob and Bella had their tea party. We took off to the woods after the little gathering was done.
My thoughts let go, “Stupid pathetic leeches. Now we’re watching them and having lessons shown to us. Taking my life away when it could have been normal. It would have been perfect. The reason my fathers dead. They carry the blood on their hands.”
Sam’s eyes met mine, “Now Leah please calm down.” his thoughts were sincere.
I growled at him, “I am calm alpha. I’m livid that we’re supposed to be ok with them being so close to us. They could attack us at any moment. You brought us there like a buffet for them.”
Sam looked at me and thought, “Leah there are ten of us and 5 of them. They wouldn’t hurt us. They know the treaty.”
I growled at him and turned and moved away from the pack. If I couldn’t get away from them mentally I would at least physically. Jacob came back and phased quietly and went back over to speak with Edward and Bella. I laid down on the ground and rested my head on my paws.
“Aww is Weah ok. Don’t pout too much girl. You always have a water bowl outside.” Paul was thinking.
I ignored him and Sam spoke to him, “Really Paul, must you start with her?”
Paul didn’t respond. Finally
Jacob rejoined us in human form, “Hey guys go ahead. I’m going to walk back with Leah. I stood up and stretched as Paul thought, “Your funeral dude. Nice knowing you.”
I lost it and lunged at Paul.
“LEAH NO!” Sam’s thoughts were loud.
Too late I slammed into Paul knocking him backwards. He growled at me and came at me. I opened my mouth biting him on the neck and he yelped. He came back at me and knocked me down on the ground. I head butted him knocking him back. All of the sudden I was knocked off by Sam,
“LEAH BACK OFF NOW! Paul go home NOW!” Sam was in my way of attacking Paul again.
I growled at him and he looked deep into my eyes. “Leah as your alpha I am telling you to go home. I will speak with you later.”
I turned around and walked back behind the trees. Sam nodded at the others and they took off and he followed them back towards La Push.
I phased back and untied my clothes and got dressed. I slowly emerged from the tree’s to see Jacob.
“Hey.” Jake smiled and walked over giving me a hug.
I was a bit taken back, “Uh hi.” I wasn’t sure what to say.
“Listen I’m sorry for you getting you dragged into all of this. It’s not fair to you.” I shrugged. “Are you not speaking to me?” Jacob looked upset.
I shook my head no, and pointed towards the clearing. “Oh.” was all he said. We walked quietly until I felt it was safe to talk.
“So why did you attack Paul? What happened?”
I sighed shaking my head, “He’s just being his normal jerk self. He said, “Aww is Weah ok. Don’t pout too much girl. You always have a water bowl outside.” I lost my temper.”
Jacob nodded. “I see. Are you ok?”
I nodded, “Yeah.” Jacob smiled, “So listen, I want to apologize for how I treated you a few days ago.”
I shook my head, “Don’t worry about. No hard feelings.”
He looked at me and smiled a little. “So I have a question for you. If you don’t want to answer I understand.”
Jacob looked at me , “What is it?”
I cleared my throat, “So I know your good friends with Quil and Embry but, you seem much closer to Embry.
Jacob looked forward again as we walked, “Yeah.”
I spoked again sighing a little, “Do you think Embry could be your brother. I mean you guys have a lot of similarities. You look like you could be related.”
Jake stopped and his shoulders dropped, “It’s not something I like to think about. I can’t remember my parents ever arguing. They always seemed so happy. I know someone’s father cheated. I like to think better of my dad. We all do well maybe not Sam as much. I’ve never been able to ask Billy.”
I felt bad now. I wasn’t trying to be a jerk I was just curious and Jacob was my friend. I walked over and hugged him tightly, “I swear to god, if you tell anyone I hugged you I will kill you.”
He laughed, “I promise I won’t tell anyone.”
We let go of one another and walked back to La Push. He left me at my front door and headed home. I made it inside to my room and fell asleep instantly with one leg hanging off my bed.