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5. Reaction to Fanfiction

Adopted by One Direction is a fanfiction on Wattpad. Before someone (wisely) had it deleted, it had over 11k reads, and almost 2000 likes. Here is @Rebecca Clearwater 's reaction to this story:

 

*facepalm*
*facepalm*
WHYYY, MIRLOTTA, WHYYYY?
WHY DID YOU MAKE ME READ THIS?!

What DIDN'T I hate about this fanfiction?
Well, this one line was hilarious. It's said by the girl's father who just randomly turned into a rapist. Here it is.
"I WILL FIND YOU AND I WILL KILL YOU!"
I died. I freaking died when I read that.
Everything else was terrible, but here are the mains:
"I can play every instrument except the spoons and triangle."
Hmm, (strokes imaginary girl-beard) EVERY instrument, you say?
Yet you only have a guitar?
Makes sense.
CHEESUS, THIS PLOT WAS SO STUPID!
This girl has been raped and abused her whole life, but she barely resists being adopted by One Direction. Makes so much sense.
The media would TOTALLY see One Direction as good people, when they adopted this fourteen year old girl. Especially when they lift her up in these weirdly sexual ways. 
(picking her up and placing her on his hip?!)
"Ya I only usually eat 8 grapes for breakfast and that fills me up for two days."
No-one can survive on JUST grapes. No-one.
"Louis was this tall but short guy"
???
"football (the one using the pointy ball)"
*facepalm*
"My mother gave me 500 dollars when I was five in case of emergency, I've had it for nine years."
OK. I have a half-brother, who used to be five. Let me tell you something- five year-olds are the EPITOME of irresponsibility. She would have probably flushed all the money down the loo, at five years old. To add to that, she's had six foster parents, and been raped by them all. Wouldn't she have used the money to, you know, get away from them?
This writer throws around the fanfiction cliches like they're going out of styles- the MC's anorexic, she self-harms, AND she's an orphan. The worst thing is, she's so flippant about it. "Like, I'm anorexic, no big deal, what's for dinner?"
You will not lose your memory if you hit your head against a door.
The author knows nothing about a photographic memory. It angered me so much for some reason.
If only one out of three billion people have a photographic memory, how come I, and two of my friends have it? So, I speak with experience when I say that NO, you don't remember the day you were born, and NO, you do not remember every moment of every day. It's damn impossible.
The MC was such a Mary Sue. Everybody loves her, yet she hates herself.
Chloe (MC) has such a disturbed relationship with her father(s). It's so... ugh. 
(shudders)
The plot, all in all, was so pathetic. The author was stuffing so many incidents in, just to give the illusion that the story was interesting.
Sorry, but I gave up halfway through, and skipped to the end.
It wasn't THAT disturbing, I guess.
But it still deserves an epic facepalm
*FACEPALMFACEPALMFACEPALM*

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