I am running for my life. sweat beads down my forehead, and my feet stumble over huge rocks that seem to be falling like meteorites into my path. behind me, my doppelganger is running- a deviously evil look on her face as she realises she is gaining on me. I don't understand how she can look so much like me, yet... so different. ahed, huge mountainous computers bond together so they display the We Know home screen- followed by the blog screen. behind me, I am suddenly shaken off the path as the doppelganger screams and begins tapping her fingers in the air- like she's using a keyboard. words flash up like bullets onto the screen, and I attempt to tug myself up back to the path as I begin to slip down into a ditch- but every 'key' she presses seems to steepen the slope and send me skidding downwards. "help!" I scream- my voice muffled for a unknown reason... with a huge roar, water plunges down on me and I plummet down into a raging whirlpool....
I cant breathe.
I jolt up with a start- panting like a dog and screaming like a baby. I've never had a dream like that before- it felt so... so real. My faded duvet gathers at my knees, and suddenly there are large, white hands steering me to face their owner. its Mason. "shush! shush, Mercy. its alright." he says, softly. "its alright, okay?" examining him, I realise he isn't wearing school uniform- but a grey sweatshirt and tatty jeans. "y...you not going to school?" I whisper, as he envelopes me in his arms. "nope, Merce. Mum told me to stay here with you after yesterday." he snorts. "didn't think you had it in you." I let out a humourless, flat laugh, before pulling away- remembering my phone. My brain still feels slightly fuzzy from yesterday, but I slap my head, and instead it merges into a light dizzy spell that I ignore easily. "seen my phone, Mason?" I ask, searching my bed and scanning my eyes over the floor. I spot something in the corner of the room- small, rectangular and grey. it has a small blue light flickering on the back of it- seemingly boasting to me that something has happened and I don't know about it. slipping my legs over the edge of the bed, I stagger over to the phone and flick the screen up. at the top of the screen, a small purple logo is flashing- embellished with the letters 'W.K.M'. It takes a few moments to process it in my mind- but I eventually realise it stands for 'We Know messaging.". maybe... maybe its User58? I'm about to click on the logo, when Mason coughs behind me and I whip around- shocked. "what's 'W.. K... M'?" he asks, trying the letters out as he says them. "nothing." I growl back. I had only meant to say it normally, but I felt like if anyone enquired into We Know- my retreat from the real world- I had to protect it from them joining too. his hands fly up in mock surrender, and I roll my eyes before shoving past him back to the bed. as I sit down, Mason is still crouched on my carpet- reading through his new text messages; but all I care about is my message. clicking on the message logo, I feel excitement rise in my throat, and.... Its fan mail. a girl waffling on about 'I love your blog!" and "what's your secret?". I throw my phone down in anger, and sit with my shoulders hunched- fiddling with the fabric of the school skirt I realise I didn't take off last night. "look, mum's not angry about last night." Mason approaches me, and picks up my phone before pressing it into my palm and sealing my fingers over the top of it. "- if that's what you're worried about." "I'm not." I reply- though behind everything else, I really am. "w.. what did I do to her?" I whisper, cautiously. Mason sighs, and begins multi- tasking as he reply's to another text. "When I got home yesterday, Mum was sitting on the sofa crying. I asked her what was going on, and she told me that you'd had a hard day with that girl and then you'd got upset with her upstairs." I breathe out in relief. I couldn't believe mum could describe my 'out- of- body' experience as just an 'upset'. "okay. will you tell her I'm sorry?" I beg. "why don't you do it?" "because I don't know how to apologise to her-" a text tone starts up, and at first I think its my phone- but I then realise Mason is already slipping his skull patterned phone sleeve off of his phone and unlocking the screen. We sit in a comfortable silence while he checks his text, and I lean back slightly on my bed- thinking. it doesn't feel like the comments on my blog are making the real me any more popular and happy- only blog me. why am I still drawn to We Know when it has done nothing for me I was hoping it would?
Maybe I just want to feel like I have a purpose. Maybe my purpose is the blog.
Flicking my hair out of my face, I blink my sleepy eyes and try to catch a glimpse of myself in the screen of my TV. maybe that's a sort of perk that's come from writing my blog- I'm starting to feel and do things more like your average teenager. When I finally get a clear view of my reflection, I briefly examine my features before turning my head away in disgust; limp brown hair, fatigued eyes, hollow cheeks, pale skin.... I really need to do another blog entry- I looked better the morning after my first one. "hey, Merce. you been flirting with older boys?" I blink, confused. "What do you mean? I don't even talk to boys my own age.". He raises his left eyebrow, and tips his phone towards me slightly so I can read the message.
From: @Dean Hudson
I don't think you know me, but I'm Dean and I'm in you're year. I was wondering if I could get your sister's number- I need to talk to her about something.
"I told you. you are such a nerd, why have you been flirting with him?" "No, I told you! I haven't been flirting with anyone." I snap, reaching for my own phone and fiddling aimlessly with the case- trying to make out its so much more interesting then what he has to say. in the end, Mason tuts and makes his way out of my room- but leaves his phone on my bed, still paused on the text message. "well- if you feel like talking to the poor man- copy his number down into your phone." I smile absent- mindedly "thanks, Mason..." I watch in horror as a smirk appears on his face. "not that I'll call him or anything." Mason smiles his full- on smirk, and finally leaves the room.
Snatching up the phone, I click on Dean Hudson's name, and watch as all of his contact details flash up- e-mail, phone number, Favourite website... Oh god, it's We Know. It must be him! User58! sprinting out of bed, I load up the laptop and tap impatiently on my desk. "Come on! Laptop. hurry up!" I say out loud- confirming the email over and over in my head. The password screen pops up, and I type as fast as I can so I end up on the homepage in a matter of seconds. Slamming my hand down on my laptop mouse, I move the cursor over to the E- mail icon- and once it has loaded- with a deep breath- I begin.
I think you're User58. you going to tell me who you are and why you want my number?
Clicking on send, I lean back in my chair and tip my head back so my blood rushes straight to my brain. I've always thought the room looked amazing upside-down. I'm not sure why.. The computer suddenly bleats out a noise, and I perform some kind of somersault off the chair- screaming and also laughing at my stupidity. brushing myself off, I straighten up onto my knees, and work the laptop from down there. he's replied.
okay, okay. I'll tell you everything.
My name is Dean Hudson. I'm 17. I'm in you're brother's year at school- he doesn't know me but I know him- and I own a blog on We Know. I've been reading your blog, and I really like it so I thought maybe I'd like you too. so... can I have your number?
I copy and paste my phone number into the e-mail.
I click send.
I bite my lip.
should I have sent it? I don't know.
I end up shrugging and logging onto my blog page for my new entry just as my phone starts up its alert tone.....