“Come on darling. Show me. I'm the only thing you've got...”


7. 7.

They have found him. My Zac. Or rather, they have found the guy who Zac used as a profile picture. It's stupid, so incredibly stupid, how easily they found him. The police used Google image search. I could've done that myself, and then I wouldn't have had my heart broken. Or at least I would've had an indication that he wasn't all he said he was. They told me that the face of Zac's name is Jake Bradford, and that he lives on the other side of the world. In America. 

I suppose they told me the truth for a reason: so that I can move forward knowing Zac was fake. Or rather, so I will give evidence in court and answer any questions they had without the aberration of my devotion to him. But it still hurts, so badly. My heart isn't in two, but in four and six and eight. My heart is made up of pizza slices now.

God, I can't even stomach pizza. And you know it's a bad sign when that happens.

My parents are more upset that me, I think. They're so shocked that the sensible, shy little girl they raised could be capable of doing such a dirty thing. Dad wasn't livid. I was fully prepared for him to swear until he couldn't breathe, or to ground me or to smash my laptop and my phone. Instead, the car was silent as we drove home. When we got into the house, he didn't even look at me. After taking off his shoes and slipping into his slippers, Dad had sidled upstairs without a second glance. My stomach churned. 

I looked at Mum. She didn't blow up either. She just firmly said, "Give me your phone." I didn't protest. Although I hunched my shoulders up, ready to wince at a sharp crack, after a few moments of twiddling it Mum gave it me back. When I opened my mouth to speak to her, she also turned away from me and went upstairs.

After making myself a cup of tea, hoping I'll be able to keep it down, I head upstairs. My bedroom is pitch black, and instead of fumbling for the light, I just plonk myself straight into bed. It's a strange thought, how this time yesterday I was falling asleep, dreaming of Zac. Now I know the truth, and I'm wondering if I can sleep at all. 

Because I have nothing better to do, I start flicking through my phone. Mum hasn't made any obvious amendments, other that deleting the TeensQuack app. Even when I go onto the website for it, I realise my parents must have blocked it. Which, I really don't blame them for. Even so, I'm itching in curiosity, wondering what's going on on the site. Whether it's all normal or if Zac has been banned or what.

Instead, I decide to go onto Facebook. Which I rarely do, because I don't have real life friends, who I feel the need to interact with online. An idea strikes me. Now my parents wouldn't be happy with me finding another stranger, but at least I know this one is real. So I type in 'Jake Bradford' into the search engine, and a bunch of names come up. Including Zac. Or the picture Zac used anyway.

It's interesting to see this guy's statuses (he has no privacy settings on, no wonder he got impersonated). They're all deep and lyrical and the pictures are always of him with a bunch of scene kids. So different to my Zac. But he spikes my curiosity, and despite it being totally weird, I shoot him a message:


Hey, uhm you don't know me, but your pictures were used by someone else on a site I used to use, and there's an investigation and stuff and they told me your name sooo here I am, not really sure why I'm messaging you. :)


With my hands shaking a bit, I leave my phone and head out of my room. I go to the bathroom and brush my teeth, do all the necessities, and when I return I see my phone glowing. I lunge towards my bed, and read the screen. It's pretty shocking to see that Jake has replied, let alone in the time frame. Then again, it's roughly eveningish in America.


aw :3 yeah I did get contacted about the thing, bit scary :S havent told me much tho, care to fill me in?


I sit back on my bed, propping my back up against the pillow, and start to type. I don't notice the time going by as Jake and I send messages back and forth. Our conversations soon go from the Zac incident to all about me, then all about him. He's not Zac, I know he's not Zac, but he's a nice guy. A very nice guy. Who made me forget, for a couple of hours, the hollowness inside of me.

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