Fuck You Over

*Said I was a douche bag won't call back, worst hangover you ever had. Felt so good at first but you knew it would never last.*
I stared at the girl in the front seat. Was that really my only competition? I had to be up against something better than that, something more classy and less trashy perhaps?
"This is Violet, she goes to the high school down the road from ours." Ashton said smirking at me. I smiled and shook her hand.
"Hey, I'm Hunter. It's a pleasure to meet you." I said sitting back in my seat. Ashton stared at me questioningly before turning the car on.
"We're gonna make one more stop at my friend Luke's house real quick." He said to Violet. She nodded. Oh no, he knew he was on to me. I sighed heavily and did breathing exercises. I forgot about Luke's part in my plan. Pretend I wasn't madly in love with him… seems easy enough.
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Hunter Masters is your regular high school teenager. She tutors for extra credit and sh

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14. 12- Families and Failing

12- Families and Failing

Four days can be translated into forever. Four days without Cassie or Michael or even Alyson. Four days avoiding my boyfriend. Four Ashtonless days. Four days of barely eating or drinking. Four days of sitting in the dark. In the dark alone. Alone all day. In the dark. Ashton kept good on his promise. Everyday he stayed with my dad for two hours waiting and then he'd leave. He'd come early in the morning to see if I was going to school that last two days and then he'd come back and spend the majority of his time in my kitchen. On Saturday and Sunday he spent hours just sitting in the kitchen. He just stared at the table. My dad offered him food and each time he said he wasn't hungry. He left late each night and came back early each morning. Today is Monday. I'm going to school. I was wearing the first thing I had in my closet which was a Berkley hoodie and a pair of torn short shorts. My hair was up in a bun and I had a big bowl of fries beside me. As I drove my car around the town I felt less and less alone. I immediately felt like everyone was there with me. Everyone was around me. I turned my fully charged phone on and I had over 125 text messages and over 80 phone calls. I checked a few which were basically all the same.

Where r u?

Hey text me!

Call me back!!

R u ok?!?!?!?

Most were from Ashton. He missed me. And God knows I miss him. I pulled up to the school and sighed. Even when you didn't the world went on. The students were all oblivious to the fact that the jock they praised so much was an attempted rapist. I sighed and slid out my car walking slowly into the school. I never gave up on my appearance. But today I just didn't care. I walked into history and listened to the students read their betrayal reports. I hadn't even started. Why couldn't I just write my life story for all of them to read. That'd get me some big points.

"Class, I've noticed that some of your betrayal stories can't be related. So I'm allowing you all to just write out the betrayal." I sighed heavily. In relief more than anything. The bell rang and I was the last to stand up.

"Ms.Masters, could I have a word?" Ms.Holmes asked. I slugged over to her desk and leaned on it.

"What's up?" I mumbled.

"I'd like to ask you the same thing, missing my class isn't something you've been known to do. And I always look forward to seeing what outfit you put together but I can see it's like you didn't even try. If there's something going on at home, you know I'd be more than happy to help." She says rubbing my arm. I already told my dad about Seth and he was one step away from pressing charges and surgically removing his organs and putting them on fire.

"I'm just really stressed." I lied.

"Hunter you're my brightest student. You work hard and apply yourself. But your paper on betrayal isn't even turned in yet. You're usually the first one to turn it in." She says. I slug down.

"It'll be on your desk tomorrow morning. I promise." I can't let this take over my life. I just need to find a way to ignore it.

"Good. And by the way. Ashton has been asking for you. He comes here and waits until class ends. You two should talk." She advises. I nod and walk out the door. I walk into the back of the library and plunk down on one of the sofas. I'm glad I have a free period. I haven't been able to be alone all day. Even if it's only been first and second period. I look around watching the teachers and students of the school. I haven't even walked into Ashton all day. Part of me thinks it's a gift from god that he isn't here with me. I doubt he'd be as lenient as my father with Seth's punishment. My dad called the police. I told them what happened in a letter and in the end Seth got kicked off the team. He also got put in jail. Well that's life. I felt my phone vibrate and I could just tell it was Ashton. I hesitated to answer. Whether he wanted to know what happened of wanted to just talk I knew I didn't trust myself around him. I wanted something I wasn't ready for. Whether he knew it or not I was terrified. My phone vibrated again. I picked it up and looked at it.

"Hello." I said

"Oh. Uh- Hey." I could tell Ashton was caught off guard. Not hearing from me for days and then I come back isn't what most people are used to.

"What's up?" Where does this conversation even go?

"How are you?"

"Better." I admitted.

"That's... Great."

"Yeah..."

"Where are you?"

"Library," I said listening to him breathe. He seemed unsure of what was going to happen. I didn't even know what was happening.

"Um- so." I hung up. I hated to hear him so unsure. So uncomfortable. Talking to me wasn't supposed to be like that. It was supposed to be easy. Easy and addicting. Same as talking to him.

I watched the day go by in my spot in the back if the library. When lunch started I simply walked out and merged into the huge group of people. I could hear the whispers about Seth bouncing from student to student. None holding me accountable. As I walked into the lunch room I grabbed my French fries and threw ketchup packets all over my tray. I sat at my regular table and sighed. I really needed to get a new life where I wasn't masterly fucking everything up. I heard a tray slam down beside me and I cringed thinking of who it could be. Please not Alyson. That would kill me. Kill me and everything I lived for.

"So I'm guessing ignoring me is your way of showing affection?" I heard Michael say my head popped up and a lazy smile appeared on my face.

"Hey," I mumbled picking up a fry and munching on it.

"Mind if we join?" I heard Calum ask. Cassie was already sitting and tugging on her boyfriend's shirt.

"Hey, you." She smiled.

"Ugh, your happiness is very gross." I chuckled leaning on Michael. She handed me a plate of fries and I gave her a high five.

"So want to spill the beans on why you left forever?" Michael asked.

"I was mugged by a penguin." I joked. Calum rolled his eyes.

"Interesting."

"Very, his name was Josh." I continued. I saw Ashton walking to our table cautiously. He sat on my left side and smiled testing the waters. I put my legs on his lap and smiled.

"Ok, so there's this scary movie coming out tomorrow night and we are all going to see it. Plus my lucky lady date. Camille." Michael smiled.

"So why are we going?" I asked through bites.

"Because she's bringing a few friends that are coupled up so I thought why not." He shrugged.

"Camille? Johnson?" Cassie asked. Michael blushed looking down at his tray. Camille Johnson was the prettiest girl in school. She's a cheerleader and a volleyball player. She has long dark brown hair and smooth almond colored skin.

(A||N she's black. She's Zendaya or Vanessa Morgan)

"Woah, I actually approve of your date." I said. Ashton was mindlessly playing with my shoe laces and his fingers.

"She's already heard of what I 'do' so she is really on edge about being alone with me." Michael said rolling his eyes. I looked around the cafeteria. The volleyball players usually ate lunch together so if she had lunch this period she'd be here.

"What movie are we seeing?" Calum asked.

"Perfect Family. With the ghost and the haunting of like half the damn house." Michael said. I was only going because Michael did things that were important to me when I needed him so I was going to do this for him.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

When school ended Ashton came over to my house. We were alone. I was internally freaking out. Not because there was a bugging sound in my head telling me that I betrayed Ashton and that I was most likely already registered for a penthouse in hell, but because when you're the reason someone gets put in jail it kind of irks you.

"What's wrong?" He asks. I was leaning into his chest watching whatever we were supposedly watching.

"Nothing, tired is all."

"What happened, between you and Seth?" He asks. Ashton was a lot of things. But stupid wasn't one. I could feel Seth's fingers climbing up my body and no matter how hard I scrub it seems like it will never come off.

"Why do you ask?"

"Because he comes here gets tutored. Hours later you lock yourself in your room and days later he's being dragged off to jail."

"Ashton, if I tell you. You need to promise not to get angry."

"I'm not promising that." He said. I sighed wishing he would compromise just once. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. How do you tell your boyfriend that you were almost raped?

"He tried to force me..." I couldn't even finish. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes.

"To what?" He pushed. I looked down and hugged my body. Did he not know how much I hated myself. I hated Seth for making me feel this way. I hated myself for being so weak and I hated Ashton for not being there. For not protecting me.

"To have sex." I choked out tears sliding down my face at rapid paces. I felt Ashton tense up. Had he expected something else?

"But you didn't, what happened?! Tell me!" He shouted. I could barely breath let alone explain the entire story. If I ran away maybe it wouldn't sound so horrible.

"I'm so sorry. I lo-" I cut myself off. I prayed Ashton hadn't heard me. If he did he didn't show it.

"Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"I made my dad promise not to and if anything it didn't get far enough to turn into anything." I said. Ashton's face was angry and then he suddenly he started frowning.

"Did you want him to..." He trailed off. I stood up quickly pulling myself as far away from him as possible. Was he serious? If I wanted it to happen then this conversation would be very different.

"You know what Ashton. This isn't about me. I was stupid to think it was. It's about you and you're insecurities." I said.

"You hang out with guys all the time. Michael and Calum." He says plucking the two off of his fingers. I roll my eyes.

"Wow! You're right I must be out there hooking up then, you know, since your evidence is so solid. You know what, I don't care, think what you want and leave me alone." I said storming upstairs. I couldn't believe he was asking me if I was trying to get raped. I locked my bedroom door and opened the window. I sent one leg through and the other behind it. I used the stones on the chimney to climb down and then I landed safely on the ground. I had no real place to go. Something in me drew me to Alyson's and I couldn't help but think that we were fighting over a guy. A stupid guy who wasn't worth the pain he put me through. He talked to way more girls than I did. I decided to talk to Michael. Even if he asked me the same question then it would be jokingly and include just brush it off. As I was walking I felt a dog run up to me and lick my leg. I jumped back. It was a big dog German shepherd looking. It's teeth were hidden by his closed mouth. He wasn't trying to eat me thankfully.

"Awe, who do you belong to?" I asked smiling at the dog. He licked me and snuggled up against me. Two small dark haired children came running to me. One looked older than the other maybe 8 and the other had to be only 5.

"Alfalfa!" The screamed making the dog jump up and run in the direction of the voices. The kids were tackled to the ground by the dog luckily falling on some grass.

"Is this your dog?" I asked rubbing the fur of the animal.

"Of course he is! He's our darling Alfalfa!" The little boy smiled. I couldn't help but smile at them.

"Where is your mommy and daddy?" I asked them bending down.

"Mommy and daddy are inside baking cookies for mommies friend." They said. I couldn't help but feel responsible for the little kids. It was cold and I was freezing even with my jacket on.

"Well um, you guys should get inside. Do you need a ride?" I asked. I mentally slapped myself. As if I had a car to drive these children and there dog around looking for a jolly looking cookie baking husband and wife.

"We live right down there." The boy said pointing to a house down the road. I could barely see it from where we stood but I could see it enough to know that it wasn't more than a two minute walk.

"Ok, well see ya around." I said brushing my hair back. The kids held hands and walked the dog across the street smiling and happy as they made their way home.

"I could've had that." I whispered watching as the mother and father embraced the children and the dog. They seemed happy and relieved. The kids just smiled and laughed as they were tickled by their parents. It was like watching the beginning of a Christmas movie. The family everyone loves to hate. I turned and continued down to Michael's house. Walking there I felt as though I was intruding. Why did I have the sucky leftover life. While some family was enjoying my mother I got the surgeon dad who worked 24/7 and the best friend who was committed to herself and the boyfriend who only wanted to make you feel like you were stuck. In a box. On a hill. In the middle of the ocean. That's where I was tight now. In a box in the middle of the ocean. I hoped drowning was easier than what I was going through now.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

I decided against going to Michael's and instead walked the long way back to my house. When I walked in my father was talking to someone. A woman to be exact.

"She's having a bad week. Anyhow you aren't allowed to be within ten to fifteen hundred feet of her." I heard him say. I walked into the kitchen and a dark haired woman was standing across from my father.

"Uh, aye." I said walking to the fridge. The lady smiled at me brightly and my father frowned.

"I thought you were at Cassie's." He said looking at me. He was obviously telling me to lie.

"I decided I was tired and I came home. What's for dinner?" I asked walking to where my father was leaning in the counter.

"Pizza? Takeout?" He offered.

"I'll call the pizzeria." I smiled walking upstairs. I stopped and turned around,

"Do you like bacon and ham?" I asked the lady. She smiled and nodded. I smiled and walked to my room. I plunked down on my bed and huffed out a heavy breath. I needed a vacation. One where I was alone with the Ashton that made me feel like an amazing everything. I closed my eyes and listened to Ashton's voice in my head.

'You're beautiful.'

'Yeah, that makes sense.'

'Hey,'

I wanted to smack myself for lashing out the way I did. I needed to assure him like he assured me. I was living in a double standard. I hopped up so quickly and ran downstairs.

"Woah, speedy Gonzales, pizza delivers." My dad chuckled.

"It's a relationship crisis." I said running to my car. I hopped in and started the contraption. I felt the car jolt to life and I was off. I drove down the, now, dark streets with determination and courage. I hoped I could hold it until I got to Ashton's. I stopped the car in his driveway and ran up to his door. I knocked hopping from foot to foot eagerly. Ashton's mom answered the door and she looked excited to see me.

"Hey is Ashton here?" I asked. She nodded letting me pass. I ran up the stairs and busted into Ashton's room. He was laying in his bed with his earbuds in. He looked up when he saw me and before he could say anything I had tackled him and was probably squeezing life and death out of him.

"I'm so sorry." He mumbled into my hair.

"Next time I'm mad at you don't let me leave, you idiot." I said into his chest. That's when realization hit me. Ashton was shirtless. And I was basically molesting him. I moved to the opposite side of his bed blushing. He seemed confused. It wasn't like we hadn't seen one another shirtless. It was just that when you're making out you only really see the other persons lips and the rest is a blur kind of.

"You want to put a teeshirt on?" I asked. He smirked at me and leaned back into his bed.

"Do you really want me to put a shirt on?" He teased. I bit my lip. Was he really teasing me already. Inside I was relieved we were back to being us.

"Yea, most definitely." I said throwing the first shirt I saw on his floor at him. He looked at the all red shirt and tugged it over his head. I crawled over to lay on him. He wrapped his arm around my torso. I hummed as my eyes fluttered close. My fingers played with the hem of his shirt. I was slowly falling into unconsciousness. And before I was fully asleep I briefly heard Ashton whisper three words.

"I love you."

a||n

I hate this. More than life. I'm writing a spin off Michael fanfic for Michael and Camille. But their relationship takes place like the beginning of college and is going to be the best fucking story ever.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Fave quote: "I was mugged by a penguin." I joked. Calum rolled his eyes.

"Interesting."

"Very, his name was Josh."

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