"Last night was great. Wait, what happened last night? I don't know." I couldn't bring my mind to actually remember what had happened last night. I was trying to damn hard to remember but, no, nothing. Absolutely nothing. The whole day it pissed me off, Pissed me off too damn right. All I could think, was what ever happened, it must have been big. The last thing I remember was letting my hands go free! Wait.. hang on a second..hands, free, "did I.. OH GOD! I MASTURBATED! The guy! It's him, I masturbated over him?" Yes, I did indeed, and now looking back, I don't regret a single moment of it. My mind was wondering the whole day. I wasn't able to concentrate on the simplest of things like, brushing my teeth, pouring milk and just sitting down for christ sake..I'd miss the frickin chair, not to mention accidently pour milk onto my sandwhich and maybe stand there with my mouth open wide long enough for the toothpaste to dry my entire mouth. This guy was a heavenly poison to my brain. He was a kind sight to my eyes, but he would enter my head at the most uneccessary times.
A week passed. This guy was starting to become amazing. He talks now. He actually talks! He doesn't shuffle his ass a little along the seat anymore when I talk out of manner, which is good, and he holds eye contact now whenever in a conversation with you, which is, progress for him, unfortunately for me I find pure eye contact with someone awkward and a little uncomfortable so there you go. A of 1 point to me, and a loss of 1 point from me. Easy come, easy go. But really, the only thing on my mind almost every second of the day, and night, is claiming him. I've had dreams, dreams that make me feel good, but not as good as 'sex'. How does sex work anyway, I mean i've read more than plenty about it, well, everything there is really, tips and tricks, do's and dont's, videos, images, and even real life stories from people around the world, some weird, some wonderful, some a big turn on and some a little shocking. I know the basics of sexual things, but nothing extreme or really over the edge. All I need to know really, is that sex is weird but wonderful connection between two humans that should happen the right way be cherished regards of creating life or not. I long for sex. I want it to be honest, and I have my vicitim...but then, I go cold, like i just literally regretted saying that! God, what is wrong with me, why can't I ever make up my mind.
A week and a half has now passed. And within just a few days....
Things are getting hot..well not hot but, a little more than lukewarm should I say. He's really opened up, more and more outstanding features are being thrown at me, more and more thoughts are emerging from my mind, my fantasies are growing, growing stronger and stronger, bigger and bigger, I can't stop them! I masturbated again last night. This time, I wanted to push myself further. I grabbed something lubricated, vaselline was my best option. I lay down on my bed, positioned myself so I was comfortable and just legt my legs flop to each side. I slid my right hand down to my pussy, and started running, up and down, up, and down, then, In a circular motion. It felt good, but not good enough. My clit. My clit needed attention. I wasted no time, I made my index finger, and my middle finger come together, and I slowly started rubbing my clit. It was better than just feeling my pussy lips, the first inside layer was fresh and was ready to be explored. I did think about fingering myself, is that what they call it? Fingering? eugh. Bit weird but, there's society for you. But no, I didn't exactly feel like breaking my hymen with my fingers, ew. But I wanted it broken.."no wait, no I don't! Yes, yes I do! But, but. Maybe he could break it for you...? SHUT UP!"
My mind was twisted. One minute I wanted it, then I didn't and then I was shouting at myself.
Almost got to the two week mark, and I just needed him, now, for real, no lies, no playing, no bullshit. I just needed him! He was talking to me literally full on now, the progress was unbelievable! Oh, did I mention he gave me a hug yesterday? That was fucking amazing. I almost lost it there and then, thank god I actually didn't! I don't know how to explain it, just, he's so irrisistable, I don't usually like sharing my feelings but this..this is something else.