I has been a two weeks since the accident. Onie and I never spoke to each other since. The feeling of disgust and guilt fills my heart. I shouldn't have kissed her. I miss her so much, her amazing laugh, her angelic eyes. I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I know I'm not alone. He's here. The shadow, mokcing, bullying and smirking. I notice that he got a little more closer. He has an overpower. One day his darkness will covers me, kills me. He's the reason I'm feeling humiliation. I'm not good at all, at nothing. Millions of Directioners and fans propably like One Direction because of the other lads, not because of me. I suck. I suck. I suck and I hate myself so much. Why would Onie like me, yet love me ? Why would she fall in love with a jerk, with a stupid guy that can't beat a shadow who ruins his life. I'm not even worth it. Now I lost her, I can drown in its darkness. I'm nothing. I am surely nothing.
Suddenly, I hear a knock on the front door. I intend to ignore it at first, but the knocks are too insisting. I walk slowly downstairs and carelessly open the wooden barrier. My heart skips a bit, and my cheeks flush immediately.Onie. I'm amazed at the effect she has on me. I stand there, staring at her, my chest pounding.
"Hi." She greets shyly.
"Hi" I imitate her, not managing to form my own words.
She looks at me for a while.
"Ummmh... can I come in ?" She asks, titling her head to the side.
"S-sure" I move a little, allowing her to go inside.
We both sit on my couch. I stay silent, not knowing what to say. She examines ther room quickly before speaking:
"Errrm... I came to thank you.. you know...ummh about that night... It's the first time I tell someone this story."
I nod, smiling.
"Everyone needs someone to talk to. I can be that person if you want to. I'll be here for you."
I've never been more sincere in my life.
"Thank you." She whispers.
I feel happyness and confidence for once. But he pops out there, just behind her, smirking at me. I ignore the shadow and smile at her again, wishing she can see it too. Maybe she'll save me from him. Unexpectedly, my phone rings and my sister's name can be seen on the screen.
"I should take this, make yourself at home." I politely tell her before, making my way to the other room, as I press the answer button.
"Hi Jazzy." I say.
There's silence before I hear uncontollable sobs.
"Jazzy ? What's wrong ? Jazzy ?"
I'm totally scared something happened to her.
"Harry ... " I hear her say "He came back last night and told me he wants my mom back... He said he'll find her and forcefully make her his wife again."
Gritting my teeth, I try my best not to throw my phone away.
"It's okay Jazz', I'll deal with it, it's okay." I reassure her.
Just when I hung up, Onie comes in, holding a worried expression.
"Is everything alright ? " She asks in concern.
Desire burns me and I grab her shoulders, making her back border the wall. She stares at me, wide eyes in fear. How I wish I can kiss her so hard and admit my love for her. But I can't, I just can't.
I loosen my grip and hold her hand.
"C'ome on, I'll show you something."