New Leaf

Oli leads a very hectic life. She's a party animal, full of lip and sass and never takes no for an answer. When falling upon the sex gods who fell from heaven (i.e. One Direction) her potty mouth lands her in some strange situations. Will bad boy Zayn be too much to handle? Or is a little Irish charm not enough?


1. Chapter 1

Quickly shoving my satchel onto my shoulder, I speed walked through the streets up to the office. My 6-inch heels clicking on the pavement as I teetered along. I bought my watch up, 7:57, I could make it, as long as this man in front of me speeds up. I over took him and began to trot up into the office almost spilling the coffee as I went.

I pushed open the glass doors, and pulled a strand of scrawny blonde hair from my face. I dashed past reception avoiding any eye contact what so ever from the little bitch.

"Cutting it fine, Smith." Cece snickered from behind the desk. What does she even do? Why is she here? All she does is sit there like the little twat sent from hell she is, commenting on my every move.

"Bitch." I muttered as I walked into the kitchen shoving my bag onto the table and walking back out with the coffees. I dashed across the corridor towards Henry's room. I tapped on the door and opened it slowly.

"Here are the coffees you asked for. Anything else?" I said as I placed the cups onto the meeting table. Henry looked up from his desk which was surrounded by massive heaps of paper.

"Ehm, no thanks Olive, I think we're okay." I spun on my heals almost breaking my ankles, thank god I held onto the door, otherwise I would have a made a complete fool out of myself.

I recomposed myself and walked into the kitchen and put the kettle on. Pulling my brick of a phone out of my back jean pocket I began a text to Emma:

You coming in yet? Slept in late? ;)xx

Emma was the other intern here and she was my work buddy. I could always count on her for a real gossip in the kitchen on breaks. But it looks like today she wasn't going to come in, probably too shattered from last nights partying we did. I smirked as the memory's from last night flooded my head.

I shoved my phone back into my pocket and poured the hot water into the mug and stirred in the tea-bag. What has my life come to? Working as an intern at some shitting recording studio, which I hardly ever get to see the famous people, because most of the time Emma and I are shoved into the kitchen and told not to bother Henry our boss as he had his meeting or what not.

Once Justin Bieber came in, and Emma and I were shitting ourselves (not literally, because that would be gross, I have my standards) and we weren't allowed to leave the kitchen for a total of 2 hours. At least we couldn't starve.

Suddenly the sound of heals clacking against the wooden flooring began to near me in the kitchen. I was secretly praying it was Emma.

"Haven't you got something to do?" Or maybe not.

"Me?" I asked tilting my head to the side mockingly at Cece. Ugh, why was she so fucking pretty, all booby and leggy, my boobs on a good day can stretch to a B, maybe C if i'm lucky.

"Yes you, who else am I talking to, dipshit." She said smirking at me.

Fuck no bitch. You didn't go there.

"Oh fuck of. Go suck a dick like you always do." I snapped walking past her like a breeze.

I was surprised at my tone, but she was a bitch, and she was fucking annoying.

Her laugh echoed through the corridor as she followed me.

"Well at least I can get some." She retorted back. I snorted with laughter and said,

"Sorry to disappoint honey, but I'm not a slag, so I have my standards, and yours are way to low, even for me." I said and shut close the bathroom door in her face. HA! Bitch. She deserved it.

I dried my hands on the paper towel and shoved in the bin. Checking my reflection and realizing my hair was the tinniest bit disheveled, I strided out of the bathroom towards the office room. I grabbed the files Henry asked me to go through and sat down huffing. And I went through those files for The.Whole.Afternoon.


"I'm back." I called out into the flat dropping my shit on the floor. Hmmm, no reply.

I was fucking exhausted but at the same time, really wanted to go out and get wasted.

"Oi! Phillis? Want to go out?" I shouted out walking towards his bedroom. I knocked on his door, and swung it open. He was lying on his bed with his laptop, and he was watching some crazy shit. I mean, I was on the floor laughing, while he tried to get decent. I kept on snorting with laughter while he whined at me.

"Heyy, stop it Oli, you could have knocked, some privacy please, bitch." He said pulling a t-shirt over his toned stomach. But I wasn't listening properly because I was still in stitches on the floor, laughing hopelessly.

"What. Was. That." I said between gasps.

"Right, you can either fuck off, or fuck off." I got up and dusted my jeans.

"Nah, I just came to ask if you wanted to go out, hit the clubs." I said swinging my arms about, "But if your, ehm, too busy, you know on, "GetMeWet.c-"

"Fuck off twat. Get out my room now, or I won't come out tonight."

I sniggered as I walked back towards his door. "Okay, but we're gonna go at around 8, okay?" I said leaning on the door.

"Yup." He said walking over to the door to escort me out. "You may now leave my room." He said slamming in my face.

Rude much?

I skipped down the corridor towards Ash's room. My mood suddenly changing into a fucking brilliant one.

"Assshhh?" I spoke through the door.

"Yeah?" He called back.

"Can I come in?" I sang back smiling goofily.

"Sure." He said. I swung the door open and flew onto his bed, face planting.

"Ow, my nose." I said, sitting up and rubbing the sore patch.

"Your fault." He said laughing. He was standing by his desk reading through some work. N'awww he was so cute. I just wanted to snuggle up to him.

"Anyway, if your gonna laugh at me, I won't tell you what I was gonna tell you, if you know what I mean?" I said smiling at him in a perverted way. Ash just looked fucking weirded out.

"Okay, what was it?" He said sighing and falling back onto the bed next to me.

"Do you want to come out tonight with Phil and I?" I said smiling at him (not in a pedophilic way, I promise..)

"Ehm, not sure. Jazz coming?" He said sitting up.

"Dunno, she 'aint back from work yet." I said standing up.

"Maybe. Maybe not." He said walking back to the desk.

"Oh come on." I whined and strided over to him and did the puppy eyes, normally works on those bitches all da time.

"Oh for fucks sake fine." He said raising his arms up in the air dramatically.

"Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Tha-"

"Okay! Fine. Now I need to sort out my outfit, very important."

"Sometimes I wonder if you're gay Ash." I said smirking before leaving his room and walking back into the kitchen to eat something. Food food food. Hmmmm.

Nachos? Ehm, no.

Cereal? No thank you.

Half eaten sausage? N- wait what?

"Ewww, Phillis com here right now you dirty boy." I shouted.

"What?" He called back from his room, not bothering to come out and have the decency to talk to my face. Rude.

"Stop leaving fricking half-eaten food in the fridge." I called back.

No reply. Very rude.

Great, we literally have nothing else.




I opened the other cupboard and found a bottle of Jazz's cheap liquor. I grabbed a couple of shot glasses down from the cupboard too and placed it next to the cheap shit.

I ran to my room, and in lightening time managed to do my make-up, hair and find an outfit all in the time of 45 minutes. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a record. I called the boys into the kitchen. I pulled my black top up a bit, didn't want to excite the boys, did I?

"Shots?" I asked grinning in a wolfish way.

"Yeah baby, that's what i'm talking about!" Ash screamed, his tone changing and grabbed the shot glass and poured himself a shot, and then repeated the same again.

"Oi, don't have it all." I said snatching the bottle from his grasp. I poured Phil and myself a glass each and passed it to him.

"Thanks." He muttered. Haha, he was still pissed off about me walking in on him about pleasure himself. I necked back at least two more shots and then pulled the boys out of the flat, locked it up and ran downstairs, almost falling. Trying not to kill myself, we got into the awaiting taxi (yes I can be organized sometimes.)

We arrived at the club, and waited in queue. "Phoar it's nippy out tonight." I said shivering in my tight ass leggings, and I mean, they were like Olivia Newton John's leather pants she had to wear in Grease. I don't even know how i'm walking in them, but damn I looked good. My top was cropped and see through. But it wasn't slutty...

The club was hot and stuffy, but I was too drunk to care and I already pulled Ash onto the dance floor, he was like my partying friend, we laughed together and goofed about and I slightly remember going to get another couple of shots after with Ash, but then, erm... I can't remember.


I woke up, my head pounding, and my eyes stinging. I immediately groaned as I began to sit up. Slowly opening my eyes, I took in my surroundings. Where was I? Oh yeah, in the foyer outside our flat.

Those people I call friends must have left my out here. Twats.

I sat up, rubbing my temples, and began to crawl to our front door. Pulling myself up by the door handle, and not managing to fall over. I pushed the door open and collapsed onto the floor again.

"Someone didn't take too well to last night I see?" I heard Phil say from the kitchen counter.

"Fuck off." I snapped and stood up.

"Rude. Your're late for work already." He said grinning at me.

"What?" Oh shit. No no no no.

"I said your're la-"

"I heard what you said." I snapped back and dashed into my room. I grabbed my bag from the side, grabbed a different top, ran into the hallway and changed quickly there, ignoring the wolf whistle from the fucktarded Phil and dashed out of the apartment in these god forsaken heels and fucking tight on my arse leggings. I ran into our parking lot and grabbed Phil's moped. He's a dick, so I don't care. I've ridden it before, i'll be fine, i'm just not walking to work, takes to fucking long, and i'm already 45 minutes late. I pulled my hair up into a messy bun and put the helmet on and sped off. Fuck their coffees, i'm not going to be an extra 20 minutes late for that. I'll make Henry a standard one in the kitchen when I get there.

I pulled up into the parking lot greeted by a lot of high pitched screams.

I also drew a lot of attention to myself arriving in my leather leggings, on a moped. Slut much?

I parked it fantastically, no joke and I began to walk up to the doors but was stopped by a barrier. I frowned as I tried to get over. A lot of the girls around me began to shout at me and scream and pulled me around. Okay. No. No-one does that to me when I have the mother fuckers of hangover headaches. I managed to squeeze my way past the screaming girls and got back to the barrier greeted by a security man.

"Excuse me, but could you let me through, you see I wor- Oh." The security man took one look at me turned away. Right. "EXCUSE ME. I NEED TO GET INTO WORK, HERE IS MY BADGE." I shouted over the screaming girls. The man looked back at me and looked down at my badge. He nodded at me and I thanked him as he helped over the barrier. The girls behind me began to protest as I ran into the building, trying not to break my ankle again, for the second time in these death traps.

"Late today." Cece sneered at me as I ran in.

"Oh fuck off." I snapped, and walked into the kitchen hanging up my stuff. I poured the already hot water from the kettle into Henry's favourite mug and stirred in the coffee. I put a couple of biscuits on the tray as well and walked down the hallway rather swiftly, towards his meeting room.

"No!" I heard a loud whisper. I turned around quickly almost dropping the tray. It was Emma.

"What?" I hissed dropping down to her tone.

"He's in a meeting." She whispered.

"So, I always go in with coffee when he's in a meeting with clients and what not." I whispered back.

"No, he's in a meeting with one direction."

Oh for fucks sake.

"What?" I said, my voice becoming louder.

"Shhh." She said.

"I couldn't give a two hoots if the queen was in there, I need to give Henry his coffee before he becomes permanently fucked off with me." I said waving her off. She sighed before walking away.

I tapped on his door quietly.

"Come in." He said. I turned the handle and pushed the door open swiftly.

"Ehm, your coffee." I said placing it down on the table.

"Hmmm oh yes, thank you. And Olive I don't think I could get permanently fucked off with you if you keep bringing in these bloody biscuits." He said raising his eyebrows. Fuck.

Oh shitty, fuck bum, faggoty fuck.

Sometimes I wonder how my swearing became... so... immature.

I looked up to see one direction sitting opposite him on the table. One of them with brown soft curls winked at me. I looked away from his captivating green eyes and adverted my gaze along the rest of them. My eyes landed on one of them with Olive toned skin, smooth, chocolaty caramel eyes framed by his long thick lashes, and my eyes landed on his cute pouty lips. I felt my face burn under his gaze as I looked away.

I turned to look at Henry, and I coughed awkwardly.

"Better get them doors sound proofed then." I laughed forcefully, which you so could tell. One of the boys chuckled deeply, and I looked up to see the one with the blonde hair, and the sky blue eyes. He wasn't bad looking, in fact, he was hot. Okay, he was fucking jump my bones hot. Holy shit. Why hadn't I noticed before. In fact, they all were, now it was awkward. I shifted on the spot trying to avoid Henry's gaze.

"Nice outfit choice Olive." Henry said looking me up and down like I was a piece of meat, I frowned and coughed before walked backwards.

"Ehm, well I better get going. That coffee won't serve itself." I was just about to leave the room when Henry's voice drifted back.

"Oh and Olive don't think I didn't notice that you were almost an hour late today."

"Shit." I muttered.

"Oh and get the boys something to drink." He said just as the door closed. Fucking bastard. I went into the kitchen to look for some sort of drink the boys might drink. I sighed knowing it was hopeless without their opinion, so I hopped off the counter and walked back to the meeting room. I tapped on the door, and walked in.

"Ehm, sorry to interrupt, but what would you like to drink?" I said bouncing off one foot to the other.

"Ohh, tea. Tea is definitely good." The one with the Doncaston accent said, bouncing up and down in his seat his brown quiffed hair bouncing with him. In fact the whole band was made up from quiffs and curls. A couple of "Yeah's" and "That's fine" were heard and I walked out the room. Right, now to make their god damned tea.

I couldn't help but think of the two boys that caught my attention the most, as I boiled the kettle. The way they both... looked. It was like they wanted me to preform an orgasm on the bloody spot there and then. I frowned shaking my head as I went to get some mugs. I began searching for some clean mugs, but couldn't seem to find any. I began to climb up onto the counter when a voice startled me.

"Need any help there, love?" In fact, it startled me so much, that I almost fell of the counter.

"Ehm, no no. It's fine. I think I got it." I said turning to look who spoke. It was Blondie. I began to get lost in his fucking beautiful orbs before I noticed I had been staring for a good 20 seconds. I coughed awkwardly and turned away from him.

"You sure? You look like you need a hand." He said, his Irish accent sticking out like a sore thumb. I gave in and hopped down the counter.

"Sure, if you can reach the top shelf." I said crossing my arms across my chest and smirking. He smirked back before leaning up towards the counter, his t-shirt rising ever so slightly exposing his toned stomach. I looked up to see his progress as he opened the cupboard and found the clean mugs. I scolded myself inwardly and looked back up again. His muscles on his arm twitched slightly as he bought down 4 mugs and reached up for another.

"There ya go." He said winking. Annndd my whole body almost fucking died.

"Thanks." I said smiling back, trying to compose myself and not collapse right in front if him.

"No problem, anything to help a cutie out." He said and left the room. The only sound could be heard was my heart beat, banging against my chest as it heaved up and down. I hid my blush as it creeped up my face, and finished making their tea.

Hi people, I just wanted to say thank you for supporting me so far, and for the fans that are still here after my year disappearance it's weird to be writing again but I enjoy it and I hope you do too! Let me know what you think in the comments:)

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