I sighed the clock ticked to the end of my shift, I shoved my stuff into my hand bag, and walked through the café. It smelt of fresh coffee beans and clean floors.
"Bye Darcy" Wendy called from the kitchen.
"Catch you after" I said back to her.
I pushed my palm against the glass front door and stepped out into the cold.
I wrapped the coat around me and made my way to my car.
Getting in with a sigh, I made my way home.
I checked the messages on the phone, there was two from Mum and one from Dad, the last message was an un known number. I sighed and hanged my coat on the peg, as the machine clicked and the message played.
Hello Darcy its Justin Thyme, I'm an old school mate err friend, classmate like ages ago anyway I'm in town, and I got your number from Becca and yea, phone me back, and we can arrange it.
My heart skipped a beat, at his voice.
The machine clicked off and I went to prepare this evenings meal.
I chucked in some cold chicken stir-fry in the microwave and thought about the message.
Justin I hadn't seen Justin since my Aunt Sonya and Uncle Zayn's wedding, that was when I was sixteen years old! Where had my life gone?
I sighed the microwave beeped and the door popped open. Burning myself on the hot plate I slammed it down on the table.
Sheehs stop daydreaming, Darcy he's an old school mate, not a boyfriend!
That thought un did another thought, the name popped out from the sky. Bert!
I shook my head; don't go there I warned myself. I stuck into my hot meal, and wondered when I could head down to see Mum and Dad, or when they could come down and see me. I sighed.
Why did I have to move for?
There part of London was so nice, and this was part was so hectic.
I thought back to my child hood. From when I was sixteen a lot had changed. Mum and Dad didn't push me to re attend High School after a certain incident. I sighed, I had a choice to attend a new high school or go to UNI. I took a third un planned option. The option where I sit at home, and did nothing to depressed to care!
Mum and Dad didn't push me, I know they wanted me to live up my life, become something, there were not strict on following there foot steps. They wanted me to see what I was good at, but that turned out to be nothing. I had the choice to step out and step up, but no, I stepped in and stepped down.
By twenty-one I moved out renting my first home, away from home. I scored myself a slow money-paying job at a movie store, someone saw my customer skills and offered me the job in the café. I've been there ever since.
My mobile vibrates on the table, I look at the caller I.D it flashes Becca, in two minds to answer the phone or to let it ring on. I pick it up, slide the arrow and press the mobile to my ear.
"Darcy speaking" I say into it.
"Oh great I got you" Bec says bubbly.
"You got me," I say.
"Did you get an messages?" she asks.
"As a matter of fact I did," I say with an annoyed sigh.
"Oh really who?" she presses.
"You know who Bec, don't give me that, and no I won't be meeting him, and your in the bad books for handing out my phone number" I tell her.
She laughs "So serious and straight to the point" she tells me.
I huff "Of course I am, you know me, or maybe you don't, giving out my number to Justin out of all the people out of eight years he suddenly just pops in" I say.
"Oh please, it is like four day to Christmas he does have family," she tells me.
"I'm not family," I argue.
"Fine, fine" she says "your choice, always has been always will be"
"Right thank you, maybe you fancy him," I press.
"You know your being dumb now," she tells me.
"Am I?" I ask defiantly.
"You are," she says in a matter of fact way.
"Right Bec, as if I go handing out numbers after eight years, plus he was a friend of you know who" I say.
"You know who, did the dirty on you, not Justin remember?" she reminds me.
"And you to Bec, you were in on it to" I sigh.
"Listen Darcy we've been through this, I was sorry, I always will be and still am, but Justin isn't the bad boy, he got out, really he's just a heart maker, not a heart breaker" she tells me.
"I'll think bout it, really, I'm going now bye Bec," I say.
"Bye Darcy, really please consider it, just a catch up" she says.
"Right, goodbye" I say.
I slide the phone across the table, and eat the last bits of my meal.
I scrub the plate, and dry it put it away, and reach for the familiar wine glass and bottle.
I curl up by the windowsill, the night is dark, and the stars twinkle, the familiar setting.
I pour my first glass for the evening.
The small voice in my head nags at me weighing me down.
Look what you've could have done it tells memy eyes fall closed, and I take my first sip.
If you went to UNI you could have been something more the voice nags.
I take my second sip, and I feel the familiar burning in my eyes.
You never let Bert go Darcy why? The voice asks.
The tears slide down my cheeks, the wine glass tilts slightly, as I shake a bit.
In moments I've drank the first glass.
I poor a second, my tears are strong and flowing now, my mind in the past, when I was giving the choice to study, and do something with my life.
My tears slide down my cheeks, and the moon shines bright and high, the stars twinkling at me.
My tears fall with a splash into the wine glass.
My eyes fall closed once again. Trying desperately to stop clinging to the past, the familiar feeling comes over me, and I know its no use, I can't ever get back what was lost, I can't ever turn the clock back, I'm in the future now, without Bert, that long evening ago, Bert and I parted ways. I haven't seen him since. But I wish I did. I don't know why, I don't know why at twenty-four years of age, my heart is still in the past with a boyfriend that did the wrong thing to me. Eight years ago I remind myself, and ever since here you are curled up crying.
After a while I take myself to the familiar comfort of my bed, and the voice in my mind to drank to answer or to protest, it can't say insults, can't make me feel bad, can't make me ache.
Bert doesn't ache and I know it, Bert doesn't care now, he stopped, he moved away and he moved on. But me, I haven't, why? Why am I still clinging to what was lost?
My eyes feel heavy now, the bottle and wine glass drop less.
The familiar heavy feeling in both my gut and heart, makes me fall into a deep effortless sleep.
I tapped the pen against my journal, thinking about Darcy, and not my work.
Again Darcy was going to refuse to move on.
Bert had done more damage then intended I beat.
What happened, happened a whole eight years ago.
I'm glad that we still were friends, I didn't deserve to be friends with Darcy, I was grateful I was, I had played a pretty big role, so it just didn't involve Bert, it involved me and a bit of Justin to.
I don't dwell on the past, I found I couldn't.
I had a string of let down, lost directions, and bad boyfriends.
Now at twenty-four, I was under the impression I was engaged to the best, a match made in heaven. I hopped the same for Darcy, someone to stir up some dust, and whisk her away, and make her see the present.
I hopped Justin would be the one to do that.
We had spoken about Darcy, we had thought about Darcy, and we have wondered how to help and what to do.
I scribbled a love heart in my journal, not thinking straight; I initialled the love heart, one side with Darcy's name and other with Justin's.
"Oh another no call" I sighed.
"She probably sucked her bottle went to sleep" Harry rolled his eyes.
"Oh please" I told him angrily.
"You know what she does," he protested at me.
"I know what she does," I agreed "and you know why?"
"Yes I know why, because of that melon head Bert, from grade 10" I huff.
"Exactly, now its four days to Christmas and she's coming up here" I tell him.
"Alright Love" he sighs.
"Don't be like you don't want to see her," I warn him.
"Oh please as if, she is our daughter Taya, I can't wait to see her, I love her, but I feel helpless cause she has the hard core, no care attitude I can't break through," he tells me.
"As if you'd want her rocking up here with "some" boyfriend" I tell him.
"Not some" he agrees, "he goes through the Styles test first"
I grin at him. "Okay, so isn't it better she waits, and meets the right guy?" I ask him.
"Meets, she won't meet anyone, sipping wine at a window sill and crying over a dead relationship Taya," he reminds me.
"But she does go out, places with Bec" I protest.
"And the company, the places where they go isn't company I want served" Harry argues.
"Your overprotective" I tell him.
"I might be fine" he grins.
I nod, and let the matter slip, thinking she'll ring when she can, or remembers.
I look at the mobile on my bedside table, waiting for it to ring. What was I expecting? Her to jump up at the chance? I was apart of what Bert did, I don't claim not to be, but I'm not Bert, I didn't walk away like he did, I didn't tear her like he had. Sure I did walk away, but it was for College, I wanted to have a chance in a career. I promised I'd return, we weren't serious we never dated, we were friends at a distant because of what happened, she was weary. But there was this one evening, a whole eight years ago, she was sixteen, I was sixteen, and her parents were getting married. I don't know how I got to there after party, and I'm not sure why. But I asked her for a dance, and the look on her face, was something I'll never forget, she was pleased to see me, it was like whatever Bert had done didn't matter, she didn't associate his actions with me. Is it bad to want that now?
I don't know if I love Darcy, I've never really tried to, I don't really know her, I get second hand details and news from Becca, Becca was in on what happened back in year 10, it was a complete and utter mess, but Darcy see's past it with Becca, something in there friendship pushed them through the rough time.
And I hope that for us, maybe the blinkers will fall away, and under it all she'll see me, Justin Thyme, not Justin Berts buddy, or Bert's offsider. Bert and I don't speak and I don't see him no more, I kept in touch after year 10, he moved away to the US, last news I heard his wife had a baby, I was invited to the wedding, I was best man. He thought he owed it to me, after dragging me, through endless trouble. We did what we did together, I live up that to, we did bad stuff, breaking hearts willingly was fun, I tell you, but I knew it affected him to break Darcy's because even though he was forced to date her, I realised he cared for her in the end and knew all along he hadn't done what was best.
Is it wrong to step into his shadow and want what's best for here on out?
I hope not, I'm sure going to try.
I smiled at the photo album still on the coffee table, after all these years it never moved. I flipped it open. And the memories flooded back. Taylor and I were parents to an adoptive girl named Darcy. Her story was long, sweet and sad. We raised her, we fought for her, and we discovered things for each other cause of her. She was twenty-four years old, and I couldn't describe how I felt for her, she was hanging in the past, and she never looked to the future. Taylor and I gave her the chance to study, and take on a career. She slipped away from us, she never took hurt well, when she was six things went pear shaped with Taylor and I, that was before we were married. I married Taylor when Darcy was sixteen. And I'm so glad everything I went through it was with Taylor, there is no better supporter, or wife. And there was no better mother for Darcy then Taylor either.
When Darcy was sixteen, she lost herself in the love boat with a good-looking boy in year 10 named Bert. But it was a set up to make her fall flat on her face and look bad. I dislike Lila Turner the bully that organised it. Darcy was never the same after the breakup, and I know she regrets what happened, she regrets not stepping out and attending UNI or getting a career. She still can do it, but I'm not sure if sitting by a windowsill, crying into a wine glass each night will get her there.
I hope some how she does it, I hope in some way, she'll see through the misty vision and horrid voices in her mind and heart, and see the opportunity. Cause we love her more then anything and want what's best, have ever since we got her, and will always want that for her.
Was that a good start?
I hope so,
Excited as always to begin the journey.
Looking forward to working on the final piece of Darcy or Haylor collection.
I hope this will be fall of twist turns and happy endings.
Before I give too much away lets dive in with mysteries minds,
To chapter 2.
Vote if you like it, comment to tell me, and enjoy it please, cause I like that.