Kelsey's Point of View:
I stayed in Justin’s embrace for what felt like forever, loving the feeling of his arms around me, his chest moving up and down in a natural rhythm. I closed my eyes, savoring this moment, knowing that in a matter of seconds, we’ll go back to face the reality that things weren’t the same anymore.
Nudging his nose into the space between my neck and shoulder, Justin placed a whisper of a kiss there. “Come on, we better get back to the guys before they throw a bitch fit.” He chuckled lightly, trying to ease the tense mood around us.
I furrowed my eyebrows together, a stubborn look crossing my face. “No.” I mumbled, shaking my head while nuzzling myself closer to him, the warmth of his body radiating against mine.
His chest vibrated from his laughter as he stroked my hair, amusement in his eyes as he stared down at me. “What do you mean no?”
“I mean just that.” I muttered, standing my ground. “I don’t want to go back there…” I trailed off, shuffling on my feet. I swallowed, knowing I was digging myself some sort of hole, here that I’d regret sooner or later. Just as I was about to pull my arms from around him, Justin caught them, keeping them in place.
“Why don’t you want to go back there?” He murmured softly, a knowing look in his hazel eyes as he urged for me to tell him the truth.
“I—” Sighing, I took a deep breath, shaking my head. “Nothing…”
Justin’s grip on my arms tightened; a sudden aurora of discontentment forming around us. “Kelsey,” He began before closing his eyes shut tight, inwardly telling himself to calm down before reopening them and staring down at me. “Don’t tell me it’s nothing. You know how much I hate that.”
I nodded my head, knowing he was right and despite the feeling inside of me that told me to stand up for myself, I didn’t want to start another argument after we had just finished one. “It’s just… I want to be with you tonight… just you and me, no one else.” Looking down at my feet, I refused to look up at him, embarrassed that I had caved.
After a long wave of silence, Justin had finally managed to speak up. “Wait here.” He pulled my arms from around him before walking off and down the hall.
Curious, I took a few steps forward, wondering where he was going and what he was doing. Standing at the base of the kitchen, I watched as Justin slid the door that led to the patio where Carly and the guys were currently seated out. He exchanged a few words with Bruce before closing it and walking back over to me. “I thought I said for you to wait in the living room?” His lips curved into a smirk.
I shrugged, playing with the hem of my shirt. “I was inquisitive.” I innocently looked up at him, resisting the urge to smile.
“Still the same nosy Kelsey Jones, eh?” Justin looked down at me, that infamous smirk of his never fading. “What did I tell you about that?” He cocked his head to the side, his body slowly moving closer to mine.
I cowered away, an acquitted smile on my face. “Well…” I let out a gentle giggle. “You know… bad habits die hard.”
Raising an eyebrow, Justin stuck his hands into the pockets of his jeans, eyes narrowed as he stared intently at me. “Oh really?”
I nodded my head, “Mhm,”
Taking a few steps towards me, Justin kept his face neutral, not giving anything away. “Well then, if I tickle you to death will the same analogy stay?”
“What do you mean—” Before I could finish my question, Justin charged towards me causing me to shriek in surprise and begin running.
“You can run as fast as you can babe, I’m still going to catch you.” Justin laughed as he chased after me, all around the couches and up the stairs where I found myself breathing heavy, not knowing which room I should go in when I just decided on going into Justin’s.
Once I entered, I turned quickly, grabbing the door, ready to shut it on him when he stopped it before I could. Screaming, I whirled around, speeding towards the other side of his bed when a pair of arms circled around my waist, pulling me up from the ground.
“Gotcha!” Justin laughed.
“Justin!” I laughed as he threw me on the bed, crawling on top of me, holding my hands up above my head soon after.
He smiled his breathing uneven from the chasing he had done. “I told you…” Upon noticing how close we were, Justin dialed his voice down to a whisper. “I’d catch you.”
“Yeah,” I gulped; my eyes never leaving his as I tried to calm myself down and bring my heartbeat back to its natural rhythm.
Justin looked from my eyes down to my mouth, repeating the process a few times before moisturized his lips, slowly leaning down.
My eyes widened once I realized what was going on and before I had the chance to retaliate, his lips pressed against mine.
A gasp emitted from within due to the bolt of electricity that shot through the both of us as Justin laced his fingers with mine, pressing my hands down hard against the mattress.
I fought the urge to moan, my insides craving for his touch, wanting this to continue on further, needing to feel his love transfer to me. I desired to feel adored again, to hear him murmur compliments in my ear about how beautiful I was, how much he loved and cared for me. I yearned to be tousled in his sheets, with our bodies pressed together and legs entangled.
I loved knowing that he was mine and nobody else’s.
Nevertheless something inside of me fought against these feelings, telling me this wasn’t right and that we shouldn’t be doing this right now but I couldn’t try to configure what my insides were telling me because Justin began to trail kisses down my neck, taking my mind elsewhere.
“I missed you so much.” He murmured, pecking the skin just under my chin gently before sucking on my soft spot, throwing me over the edge.
Moaning, I arched my back, my teeth sinking into my bottom lip. “Justin…” I breathed out, the intensity between us multiplying by a hundred as Justin worked his magic.
Most likely leaving a mark, Justin moved back up, releasing my hands as he placed each of his own beside my head, keeping him balanced as he stared into my eyes. Not even saying a word, he remained calm, his inhalation rigid.
I gazed into his eyes, taken back by the swirls of desire, want, need, adoration and determination that were set in his hazel irises; it was as if he had put me in a trance. I couldn’t move nor speak, I was paralyzed underneath him and it was then that I noticed the hardness around his eyes, showing the uncertainty he held within. Hesitant at first, I leaned over, brushing my fingers against the tense points, smoothing it out.
Closing his eyes under my touch, Justin leaned into me, instantly calming as his body relaxed. “I missed your touch.” He mumbled more to himself than to anyone else.
I sadly looked at him, knowing how he was feeling. I inwardly begged for things to go back to the way they were before, I wanted to forget the past three years and just focus on the future.
Leaning my head up, I captured his lips in a sweet kiss, cupping his cheek in the palm of my hand, I brought him back down on top of me. Pulling away, I watched as he pressed his forehead to mine.
“I love you.” He murmured gently, sweeping the hair that fell in my face back as he tucked it behind my ear, his thumb then caressing the skin of my cheek.
“I love you too.” I whispered back, tears blurring my vision. I couldn’t believe this was happening right now and the overwhelming feeling it gave being able to see, touch and talk to him hit me like a ton of bricks.
Wrapping his arms around my waist, Justin nuzzled his head into the nape of my neck, holding onto me tight. “You don’t understand how long I’ve been waiting to hear that again.” He confessed, his voice coming out muffled.
Biting my lip, I tentatively ran my fingers through his hair, gently scraping at his scalp in a soothing motion, wanting nothing more than to stay in this position forever.
A comfortable hush filled the air as Justin held me close; our breaths coming out even and on point. It had been a while since I last felt his peaceful and I didn’t want to let go of this moment.
“You know,” Justin muttered quietly after a few seconds, “all I wanted was for you to be okay. I didn’t care about myself or what was going to happen to me. All I cared about was you and how you were going to handle this.”
I closed my eyes at the memories that rushed towards me all at once; reminding me of the horrible things that had gone down ever since I had found out he was taken into custody. “I was a mess.” I admitted sheepishly. “I couldn’t sleep knowing I wasn’t going to be able to see you the next day.”
A pained look crossed Justin’s face as he tightened his arms around my slim waist. “I know.” He mumbled. “I hated not knowing how to comfort you. I knew it’d kill you but I didn’t think just how much it would actually affect you.”
“Did you honestly think I wasn’t going to be torn apart?” I looked down at him incredulously, my mouth going dry as Justin stiffened in my arms, his eyes glassing over.
“To be completely honest,” Justin paused, licking his lips as he tried to find the right words to defend himself. “I hoped that you wouldn’t have. I knew deep down that it would tear you inside but I didn’t think you would have gotten to the point where you wanted to end things with me.”
“Trust me, I didn’t want to; I just didn’t know what else to do.” I sighed, a bubble of uncertainty brewing within me. “It hurt me a lot knowing that you lied to my face… and before you defend yourself,” I quickly intervened once I saw Justin open his mouth to throw his few cents in on his side of the story, “I know what you were doing was for the benefit of me, I do, but… a part of me just couldn’t get passed the fact that you told me you were going to come and then I had to find out—from someone other than you—the truth on what you had really been doing.”
Justin shook his head, laying his chin on my chest as he looked up at me. “I wanted to tell you—” He began before I cut him off.
“Then why didn’t you?”
“Because I knew you would have been waiting for me, worrying every second of the night on if I was okay, when I was going to come home to you and I couldn’t do that knowing that it would just hurt you in the end.”
“What hurt more in the end was finding out that my boyfriend was arrested. No matter what, if you would have told me, I would have known there would be some sort of outcome—good or bad. You always told me the truth no matter what it was. When it came to Parker, you let me know, hands down, what was going to happen so I didn’t have anything to worry about. When it came to your business ideals with the guys, I knew then not to worry because you knew what you were doing and half the time I was with you when you discussed it.”
Justin observed down at me for what felt like forever, my words gradually sinking into him and then, for the first time tonight, he said the exact words I’ve been waiting for him to say. “I’m sorry.” He breathed out, a fragment of sadness and regret in his eyes.
Just then, it was as if nothing else mattered.
Not being able to contain myself any longer, the tears that I had been holding in for so long slid down my cheeks as my bottom lip began quivering slightly.
Concern immediately filled Justin’s eyes as he spotted the salty substance on my skin. “Shhh, baby,” Justin wiped at my cheeks before pulling my head to his chest, sitting up on his knees as he brought me into his lap. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.” He placed several kisses on the top of my head, smoothing it out afterwards.
Holding onto the base of his neck, I continued to cry into his shoulder, all the emotions in me releasing all at once.
“Fuck, Kelsey,” Justin hugged me tight, concern laced in his words as he murmured words of encouragement in my ear. “Please don’t cry.” He sighed. “I hate it when I upset you.”
When I didn’t say anything, he continued. “It’s going to be okay, we’re going to be okay.” He said seconds later, slicing through the uncomfortable silence that enveloped us. “We’re going to make it.” He squeezed me in reassurance.
I dug myself deeper into his shoulder, not being able to face him just yet, his promise to me wavering over my head in a taunting manner.
All I wanted this whole time was for him to act contrite. I didn’t need false promises or words of encouragement—I had enough of that to last me a lifetime. What I needed was his love, comfort and an apology.
And that was what I had gotten.
I knew that the Justin I had fallen in love with was still there inside of him despite the years we’ve been apart from each other which was all I ever wanted.
Pulling away, I feverishly wiped at my cheeks before grasping onto each side of his face and bringing him into a passionate kiss, one that he quickly surrendered to. Grasping onto my hips, Justin squeezed them before sliding his tongue across my bottom lip, asking for permission.
Parting my lips, I moaned into his mouth the second I felt his tongue move against mine, a complete arousal taking charge. Pressing my chest against his, I slid my fingers into his hair, tugging at the ends causing him to groan.
Smirking against the kiss, I purposely swung my hips against him, knowing it’ll drive him crazy.
“Jesus Christ,” Justin muttered, biting down against my bottom lip as he dragged it out before slipping his tongue in my mouth once more, his hands sliding down to my butt as he gave it a squeeze.
Pulling hard on his hair, I moaned loudly, everything around us coming to a halt as though the only people in the world as of now were just us.
Gently pressing me down against his mattress, Justin hovered his body over mine, never once separating us. Skimming his fingers against the exposed skin on my stomach due to my shirt riding up, Justin tore his lips away from mine, breathing heavy. “I’ve been waiting for this moment,” Searching my eyes, he took a deep breath. “Ever since I found out I was being released.”
Biting the inside skin of my bottom lip, I shrugged. “Then what are you waiting for?” I whispered.
Desire pooled over the innocence of hazel in his eyes, brewing them into a storm of infatuation. Not even wasting another moment’s time, Justin attached his lips back to mine, his hands on the rim of my shirt as he began tugging it up.
Wrapping my legs around his waist, I meshed our bodies together, the longing of being wanted growing within me.
Pulling my shirt up and off my body, Justin gazed down at me with lustful eyes. “You’re so beautiful.” He kissed me while sliding his hands down to the top of my jeans. Unbuttoning them, he brought them down my legs before discarding them to the side.
Running my hands down his back, I grabbed the edging of his t-shirt before sliding it off of him and dropping it to the ground next to the bed, my hands instinctively falling to his chest as I began running them up and down his chest. I couldn’t help but gaze down and see that my assumptions from earlier were correct—he had been working out.
Tugging on his hips, I brought him back down on top of me.
Breaking apart from the kiss, Justin began trailing kisses down my neck causing a soft moan to escape my lips.
Taking this as my opportunity to undo the button and zipper on his pants, I tugged them down enough so that Justin could kick them off. When he did, I roamed my hands all over his body, up and around his back, against his arms, feeling the toned skin underneath my fingers.
Groaning against my mouth, Justin took a deep breath in through his nose and within seconds, the rest of our clothing was shattered from protecting us. “I love you.” He kissed me.
“I love you too.”
Positioning himself in between my legs, Justin placed his hands on either side of me. “Tell me if it hurts, okay? I know it’s been a while…”
Nodding, I pressed my lips together bracing myself for the indescribable feeling I would be experiencing in just seconds.
Taking hold of him, Justin surged his mouth against mine and in one swift movement, he was inside of me.
A soft gasp emitted from his lips due to his lack of sexual favors the last three years as I stifled a cry that was forming at the pit of my throat. Pressing my feet against the mattress, my toes curling from the perception, I dug my nails into his back, moaning loudly, Justin’s hard, determined movements against me growing with each thrust.
Justin’s tongue searched mine, his hands on every inch of my body, his lips soon following. “You feel so fucking good baby,” Justin mumbled against my chest as he continued his thrusts.
An hour later, I felt my body shaking from the anticipation of my walls closing in around him. Taking a deep breath, I whimpered at the every nerve in my body that was focused on the shuddering of my insides. Justin held his breath as he thrusted into me once more before collapsing on top of me.
Justin took a couple deep breaths to calm him down, flabbergasted and dripping with sweat. Justin turned on his side, pulling me into him while scanning me with nothing much love in his eyes.
As I lay next to him, seeing the unconditional love he detained for me in his eyes, I let go of all the anger, tension, disappointment and stubbornness I held. I loved him and no matter what my reasons were for living without him, I knew that I couldn’t. He meant too much to me and our love for one another was too strong of a bond to break.
Placing my head on top of his chest, I placed a whisper of a kiss there. Wrapping my arm across his stomach, I nuzzled up beside him, fortifying our legs together. “I missed this.” I whispered.
“I missed you.” Justin kissed my temple while holding me firmly to his side. Grabbing my right hand in his with his left, he brought it up to his lips, kissing each knuckle before interlacing our fingers together.
Despite wanting to stay up, I couldn’t keep my eyes from closing and before I knew it, I blacked out into a peaceful sleep—one I haven’t had in a while.
Justin’s Point of View:
I lay awake that night, not being able to sleep in arrears to the limitless sleepless nights I had in my cell back in prison.
All I could do was watch Kelsey, admiring her beauty and thanking God I was able to hold her in my arms again.
Various thoughts ran through my mind, reminding me of how many times I had fucked up in the last few years and the only thing I regretted the most was never saying goodbye to Kelsey when I had the chance.
If I just would have told her the truth, I would have been able to give her one last kiss goodbye to remember me by instead of leaving her with a blank void, not knowing what could have been.
When she told me today that she was done with us, I didn’t know what to do anymore. It felt like my whole world was crashing down around me and I was suffocating. I couldn’t lose her because that would be like losing a part of me. Kelsey’s everything to me and without her I’m nothing.
Stroking her hair, I felt the insides of my stomach pull into an unfamiliar churn. Licking my lips, I peered down at her through my lashes, my thumb outlining her lips, moving onto her jaw before tracking her eyelids.
Knowing I wasn’t going to sleep anytime soon, I maneuvered my way out from under Kelsey’s arm, untangling our legs. Giving her a soft, gentle sweet kiss on her lips, I moved out of bed, standing up. Grabbing my boxers, I slid them on before pulling on my jeans, letting them hang low as I exited the room.
Jogging down the stairs, I expected to hear nothing but silence which was why I was a bit taken back when I saw all the guys on the couch, talking amongst one another while playing a game of cards.
Bruce was the first to look up. “Hey,” He nodded his head in my direction. “Get a good night’s rest?”
The guys snickered, clearly catching on to what had been going on upstairs.
“Yeah, I did.” I shot back with a grin before taking a seat next to Marcus as he handed me a beer.
“First day back and you’re already fucking Bieber?” Marcus teased. “Damn,” He shook his head. “You both sure know how to get it in a lot.”
“—fuck up.” I slapped a hand to the back of his head. “I haven’t seen my girl in three years. Don’t be mad just because you don’t have a girl to please.” I smirked, chuckling.
It was Marco’s turn to smirk now. “I beg to differ, Bieber. I actually happen to have a girl of my own, thank you very much.”
I raised my eyebrows, taken back by the news I was just informed of. “You finally found someone other than your countless pictures of Megan Fox?” I couldn’t help but laugh, the guys laughing following along.
“Look who’s hilarious now.” Marco sardonically remarked, taking a swing of his beer.
“I’m just messing with you, man.” Tipping my head back, I chugged down about half of it before settling it down on the table. Licking my lips, savoring the taste I had been longing, I established back against the chair comfortably. “What’s her name?”
“Alec,” Marco fought the urge to smile and I couldn’t help but grin. He always teased my relationship with Kelsey but now he was just about the same way when it came to his. “Alec Johnson.”
“Are you blushing, Messina? Do I see your cheeks turning pink?” I teased, staring over at Marco, trying hard not to laugh.
Marco shook his head, laughing. “No, you idiot.” He mumbled, looking away.
“Somebody’s in love.” I cooed, shooting him a cheeky smile.
“Shut up, Justin.” Marco muttered, glaring playfully at me. “I’m not in love. I don’t do that type of stuff.” He waved a hand dismissively.
“Stuff?” Marcus intervened, raising an eyebrow. “Pft, you’re so in love with her that you call her every night just to tell her goodnight.” He held in his laughter, knowing he had put Marco on the spot.
“How the hell—”
“The walls aren’t made out of stone, Marco. I can hear you, you know.” Marcus shook his head, his chest vibrating from the humor he found in all this.
I sniggered. “You’re so whipped bro.”
“And you aren’t?” Marco snapped, glowering.
“I never said I wasn’t.” I countered with a mischievous grin, finishing off my beer before settling it to the side with all the others that were finished. “What about you boys?” I turned to Marcus and Bruce. “Do you guys have any girls to call your own?”
Bruce shuffled on the couch, clearly taken back by my question making this all the more amusing. I could tell he was fighting the urge to smile.
When he didn’t say anything, I leaned forwards a bit. “Well?”
He shrugged, shooting me a wink while drinking, indicating his answer was yes.
“What the hell, I’m gone for three years and each of you has found a girl? What kind of bullshit is this?” I muttered jokingly to him, smiling.
“You didn’t expect us to stay single forever, did you?” Bruce looked at me with nothing but amusement in his eyes.
I laughed. “Well…”
Bruce put a hand up, stopping me. “It was a rhetorical question.” He grumbled, grabbing himself another beer while tossing me one.
Catching it, I took off the top before taking a sip. “What’s her name?”
“Stephanie Amara.” Bruce spoke after swallowing. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand he then nodded towards Marcus. “And Marcus’s here is Kadra Thompson.”
“Are they hot?” I grinned, laughing to myself as Bruce shot me a dull expression, clearly not pleased with my question
“No, they’re hideous.” He sarcastically remarked. “What kind of question is that?”
“I’m just saying man,” I held my hands up in defense. “I’ve seen some of the girls you’ve hooked up with in the past and well… you get the idea.”
“Fuck you.” He grumbled, glaring at me.
“Sorry,” I snickered, “that’s Kelsey’s job.”
Bruce threw a pillow at my face, nothing but hilarity in his face. “You’re an ass.”
“Tell me something I don’t know.” I retorted with a sheepish grin. Finishing the last of my second beer, I turned to John for the first time since I stepped down here. “And Johnny boy here’s got Risi.” I quavered my head, still not being able to believe he got with that son of a bitch.
“Yep,” John nodded, not even daring to look at me as he stared at something on the other side of the room.
“What the fuck’s wrong with you?” I spat, the air in the room suddenly turning edgy.
John shrugged. “Nothing”
“Don’t bullshit me man, what’s the attitude for? What did I do this time for Christ’s sake?” I muttered in annoyance.
“Nothing bro, don’t worry about it.”
“The fuck you mean don’t worry about it? You’re my bro; of course I’m going to ‘worry about it’.” Turning to the guys, I gestured towards John. “What sup with him?”
“He’s still pissy about what went down with Risi earlier today.” Marcus answered for me, earning a hard stoned glare from John.
I turned to him. “You’re upset because of Carly?” When John didn’t say anything, I took the as a confirmation. “I was just fucking with her bro, it didn’t mean anything.”
“I wonder what you look like when you’re being serious.” John monotonously replied.
“I may not like the bitch but she’s yours to deal with, not mine. She’s a tempered one and god so help me I’m not going to let her butt into our business. I don’t trust her and neither should you but that’s your mistake to make, not mine.” I licked my lips, staring intently at him, my eyes practically burning through his. “I’m happy you found somebody bro but don’t think I’m going to let the things she did slid just because your my boy.”
“You mean how she saved your ass from going to jail? That’s nice.” He hissed, clearly displeased with my words.
“I had to scare her into working with me. If it wasn’t for me threatening that bitch—” Before I could finish talking, a full blown fist flew at my face, hitting me right in the jaw.
“Call her a bitch one more time,” John pressed hard; warning me, his chest moving furiously fast.
“What the fuck bro?” Standing up, I nearly knocked over the chair next to me as I slammed my own fist into his nose, sending John flying backwards.
Taking the hit, John held his nose, cursing under his breath. “Don’t fucking disrespect my girl like that, Justin. How the fuck would you like it if I referred to Kelsey like that?”
“You wouldn’t have the chance; you’d be dead before you even got to register the rest of your sentence.” I sneered, rocking my jaw back and forth to check if it was broken or not.
“The same thing lies here. You don’t have to like her but respect me enough not to bad mouth her especially after everything she did for you.” He wiped at his bloody nose. “She was the one consoling your girl when she would cry herself to sleep every night. She was the one who reassured her that your sorry ass was going to make it. She was the one who took care of her when we couldn’t. She was here for Kelsey when you weren’t.”
I stared at him with nothing but disbelief and hurt. I knew how much I had hurt Kelsey, the last thing I needed was to be reminded every five seconds about the mistake I made. “You know if I could have been here for her, I would’ve.”
“But you weren’t, Carly was and that’s the reality of it all. Don’t be mad at us because you couldn’t be here.” Sighing, John ran his fingers through his hair. “Look man, I know you’re going through a rough time, we all are but don’t take it out on us.”
Before I even had the chance to retaliate with a few choice words of my own, commotion was heard from upstairs, a faint “Justin?” catching my ears.
Turning my head towards the direction of the sound, worry evident on my facial features, I watched as Kelsey came walking down the stairs in nothing but my t-shirt, eyes extensive. “Justin?” She asked again, a bit more frantic this time.
“I’m right here, baby.”
When she shot her head over to look at me, my heart skipped a beat once I noticed the red lining coating her eyes.
Quickly making my way over to her, I stepped on the stair just under the one she stood on before grabbing her face in my hands, stroking her cheeks with my thumbs. “What’s wrong?”
“I—I thought you left,” She stammered on her words. When she noticed my frazzled expression, she began playing with the bottom of her shirt, fumbling on her bare feet while tugging her bottom lip into her mouth, chewing anxiously.
Furrowing my eyebrows in confusion, I took a second to process what she had just said. “Leave? Why would I—” But before I could complete my question, John’s words from before rang in my ears.
“Don’t be mad at us because couldn’t be here.”
And suddenly realization dawned on me.
Taking her hands in mine, I sadly looked down at her, nothing but grief filling my body. “I’ll never leave you.” I mumbled, pressing my forehead to hers. Without even so much as a goodbye to the guys, I grabbed Kelsey’s hand, taking her up the stairs and into my room.
Closing the door behind us, I turned to face her. Brushing her hair back, I placed a chaste kiss on her lips. “You won’t ever have to worry about me leaving your side again, okay?” I reassured questionably, keeping her close to me.
She numbly nodded her head, her lips pressed together in a firm line.
Sharing another desperate kiss with her, I took my shirt, pulling it off of her before bringing her over to the bed. Lying down, I brought Kelsey beside me. “I’m here to stay.” Securely wrapping my arms around her, I kissed her cheek. “I’m not going anywhere.” I crooned in her ear.