5. Chapter: 4- Anxiety
After we boarded the plane and had taken off I started to freak out. Anxiety is common for most cancer patients and even those without cancer. I'm worried that they’re not going to like me. I hope I don’t look like a complete idiot when I meet them. Imagine hanging out with people who don't like you for a whole week. That would suck. Then my wish would be wasted.
I don't want to sound like some desperate girl or stupid. But I don't want them to think I'm a freak or that they just pity me because I have cancer. I could say that I am relatively strong when it comes to what people think of me or what people say, but if my idols/heroes think stuff like that its completely different.
Like for cooks, their idol might be Chief Gordon Ramsey but if he went up to them and said that their food tasted like crap their dreams and heart would be crushed. It's the same with me except I'm not a singer and I don't expect them to like my voice, nor do I plan on letting them hear me sing. "Payton, wake up. The plan landed." I open my eyes and see my mom standing up along with other people on the plane.
My mom and I made it over to the luggage area and after about what seemed like hours finally got our bags. We walked through the doors and were hit by the night’s crisp air. It was pretty cold. Even for the summer time. I pulled my sweatshirt closer to my body and followed my mom towards a taxi. The taxi drive was about half an hour and then we had reached the hotel that we were staying at.
I pulled the bags onto a cart while my mom went and checked in. A hotel worker came out and helped my pull the cart. It wasn't heavy but I didn't mind the help. My mom handed me a hotel key and we went up to the top floor. There were twenty-five floors in this hotel so it was pretty tall. After bringing the cart back down to the lobby I went back upstairs and took a shower.
The nice thing is that I don't have to worry about jet lag because Florida is in the same time zone. So it was two-thirty in the morning here and there. I'm still a little worried about meeting One Direction but all of my worries go away as I slip into a nice dreamless sleep.