Tough Loving You (Phanfiction)

Dan and Phil are some of the best vloggers in the world. They love what they do, stating the obvious. But they have one of the toughest jobs too. Phil has never kept a secret from his best friend Dan, all except one. When Dan discovers it his life is put in a different perspective but soon Dan finds it every increasingly difficult to keep his amazing lifestyle in order. As it crashes, will Phil be his answer to everything?


11. aftermath

Dan was the only one still awake, but quite intoxicated by this time as he'd got bored of his own company by being 'alone'. There was a few cans of beer next to Dans feet. Phil almost fell asleep on the sofa, it was the early hours of the morning and Dan decided to get Phil into his bed, although he'd probably sleep on the sofa. Chris and PJ eventually got up and wandered off to Phil's bedroom as quietly as possible, holding hands and silently treading along the corridor. Dan shook Phil's shoulder in order to wake him.

"Phil, Phil?" It was a sort of loud whisper but Phil didn't react. So Dan stumbled to get up to his ear and had his whole body balancing and leaning over Phil's body. He whispered in his ear.

"Phil, are you still awake?"

This caused some stirring.

"Hmm? Dan?" He wearily replied.

Phil then opened his eyes to see Dan really close to his face, staring in the eyes and then quickly glancing at Phil's lips then back at his eyes again. Phil let out a high pitched whimper as his eyes adjusted.

"Shh, don't worry, PJ and Chris are in bed now." Dan slightly slurred.

"Oh okay, do you want to sleep in your bed tonight and I'll sleep on the tiniest double sofa in the world? or what?" Phil tried not to act a bit terrified of how close Dan still was to him.

"We can sleep together? because we're them sort of friends aren't we? I mean, we could sleep together, couldn't we!?"

"Dan, how much have you had to drink?"

Dan slithered back to his original position.

"Not much" Dan hiccuped.

"Lies, haha. Do you want to sleep in the same bed then?"

"Come on then!" Dan rather excitedly said as he grabbed Phil and took him to his bedroom. Phil was dragged behind.

They got into the room and to be honest with himself, Phil was scared. He didn't know what on earth drunken Dan was going on about. But maybe it was something experimental in Dans subconscious. Or it was the sober Dans real feelings seeping through.

Whatever it was, Dan certainly wanted to show Phil.

"Now, Phil, this is going to be weird what I'm about to say, but trust me on this... I like you a lot." He hiccuped after and then walked over to a petrified Phil standing ridged in the corner.

"Wha-what? What do you mean by that then? Is that the beer talking, isn't it?"

"No no no no no" Dan said as he shook his hand at Phil. "The *hiccup* 'sober' me as you may sayyy, is reluctant to say anything whatsoever and hiding true feelings, I'm here just to say I love you. Now get into bed." he commanded, but he didn't sound threatening.

"Urmm, Dan, you wouldn't ever say that? You don't really feel that way do you?"

"Of course I feel the same way, I'm just afraid of what you say"

"What should it matter what I think Dan, it's YOUR feelings that matter." Phil then got angry "why can you never just-just say what your feelings are to people! You conceal what you're feeling from the world because you're too afraid! I just want you to be more honest with me!"

"I've just now told you!"

"WELL YOU COULD'VE TOLD ME BEFORE! Urg!" Phil shouted, bursting with anger.

Then they just stood there, staring at each other and sweat starting to glimmer on their forehead.

"We've probably woken up Chris and PJ." Dan calmly said. "But then again they fuck loud so it's probably us that will hear them"

"Dan!" Phil hissed, then sat down on the bed, Dan joining him. "Look, are you sure you feel this way, I don't want you regretting anything in the morning"

"When I say I love you, I really mean it. So, that's all I've got to say. What do you say?" Dan started to get a little teary and emotional.

"Well, you know how I feel Dan, because it must've been obvious.I love you, I've loved you for ages, it's such a relief to hear you feel the same as I. Hmm." Phil cocked his head sweetly to one side.

"So what now? I love you, you told me you feel the same"

" Dan it's too late to talk right now, I'm tired so please can we go to sleep." He paused "But, not before I know you more than a friend" Phil seductively said looking up at Dan with puppy eyes.

"How do you mean?"

Phil looked at Dans lips then leant in fast, eyes closed and their lips fitted perfectly together. Phil couldn't stop himself from releasing all the sexual anxiety to kiss Dan that's been bottled up for an eternity. Without a second thought he shoved Dan on the bed to lay down and quickly got back on top of him, pinning Dan down. Dan got engulfed in the Phil tilde wave, the shock sort of sobered his mind a bit, but only had his eyes wide open for a moment before tightly closing them and giving as much effort as he could into their kiss.

He then brought Phil tumbling on top of him as he wrapped his arms around Phil's neck and hooked his legs round Phil's lower back, softly grinding against the elders grind. Their kisses became more passionate, deeper and more angry, especially from Phil who wanted this so badly for ages, still angry that Dan hadn't admitted his true feelings for ages. Phil felt incredible and powerful over Dan at this moment, he had us hands cupping dans soft cheeks then repetitively ran his hands through his hair, scrunching it for the pleasured moan Dan would always give out, making Phil grasp Dan even tighter. Even though Dan was still slightly sober, Phil couldn't help thinking that this was the drink in Dan talking and not his real feelings and he felt he might be taking advantage of Dan a bit.

But Phil's thoughts were interrupted by a loud manly scream from Phil's bedroom which froze both Dan and Phil mid-make out. Phil scrambled to his feet.

That was not Chris or PJ, what the fuck is going on?! I got up but Dan was still lying there, his once flawless neck covered in my nibbles. But he sat up with a what-the-fuck kinda look on his face.

"That wasn't Chris, or PJ" Dan calmly said.

"No it wasn't, but it was close to us, so who was it?" I tip-toed towards the door with Dan close behind me. The door creaked open as I pushed against it. I felt Dan hold my hand tightly, which reassured me, even if he is completely cowardly when it comes to fights. We walked out of the door greeted by the same noise again. I stepped closer to my bedroom door as it was close to Dans.

"I think I should go in and check on them and see what the fuck is going on" Dan whispered behind me

"You can't! you're pissed! And terrible in a fight, if there is some sort of danger. I'm sure everything's okay." I tried to reassure him, I knew he was worried, he had that sweet, innocent look on his face.

I slowly twisted the handle, anxiously opening the door, not knowing what to expect.

The image that greeted me was all too hostile. Chris had PJ handcuffed to the bed (where on earth did be get them from?) and whipping harshly against his chest and thighs. Chris only had his trousers on as he circled a helpless PJ, with only his pants on. The two were clearly not aware of my presence in the room. I stared wide-eyed at the scene. It was like one of those things where I don't want to look but I can't help BUT look.

We both then had to speak in a hushed tone.

"Phil, what's happening?" Dan said as he grabbed me back out if the room.

"It's PJ making unearthly noises. It's really not like him to do all this sort of stuff, he's not that sort of gentle soul."

"Doing what? Let me in so I can see??" Dan sort of slurred back again.

"No! They need flipping privacy don't they?" I raised my voice a little. But Dan completely ignored me and pushed past into the room.

"And you deserve to be punished."

Chris commanded towering over a helpless PJ.

"Yes" PJ moaned. He was struggling to talk against the pain and what seamed like pleasure.

"Yes, what?" Chris said as he whipped PJ across his abdomen

"Yes...sir" at this moment me and Dan tensed as we weren't sure how much PJ was actually into this sort of thing.

We were still sort of glad that they both hadn't noticed us at the door. But I decided that we need to leave them, god knows what they'll do for the rest of the night and I am not watching my two best friends go at it for any longer.

"Come on Dan, we should leave" I whispered, unsure if he'd actually heard me.

"Alright then, are you sure PJ is alright though?" He asked as we quietly closed my bedroom door.

I ignored the question and hurried back to Dans room.

"Don't ignore it! I'm just saying, I don't think that PJ is all into that physical pain thingy." he hushed in my ear, then wobbled where he stood.

"Look, it's none of our business what goes on, now go to sleep. Please."

Dan just collapsed on his bed and fell asleep immediately. I wasn't surprised, it had been a rather long and exhausting day.

But I still craved Dans touch on my lips, the feel of his hand on my waist, the softness of his neck. I had a feeling that he would never again be as close as tonight (as he was drunk) and probably wouldn't remember much of this. I lay next to him and pulled the covers over his shoulder and kissed hi on the cheek before drifting off myself.

It was a beautiful just to think that this could be my life if we just admitted our feelings, especially Dan. He could be my Danny forever. It was comforting to be in the same bed as someone I trust and, very much so, love forever. I slept more peacefully than I had in ages.

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