Oh My Dearest Love

They're bloody British! This is a story about the internet stars of Youtube, Danisnotonfire (Daniel Howell) and Amazingphil (Phillip Lester). They are in UK, London! They've been friends since highschool, and now they've moved in together. They've been living together for a while now... But friends have they're little secrets... But will one big secret slip? What happens when Phil is having trouble keeping the secrets in the closet?...Will Dan find out?.. Or will it forever be kept... In the closet.


9. I'm sorry

Phil's POV;


        It's late and I'm going to bed. I lay down in my bed and toss and turn. Me and Dan don't want to rush things so we still have our separate rooms.  After a while I finally slip into a deep sleep.




        I'm walking down the street late at night. I'm looking around, so confused on why I'm here. I continue walking down this street. I then see Dan alone on a park bench. I look and my whole face lights up I can feel it, "Dan!" I shout. He doesn't respond, turn around, or anything... Almost like he didn't hear me. No one else is around but me and Dan. I sigh and run to the park bench. I finally get to the back of the park bench... But it's cold now... It was warm just a second ago where I was. "Dan?" I say trying to get a response out of him. Nothing. Not even a movement. I'm confused. Is he playing a game with me? I just roll my eyes. I walk around the bench and I'm now face to face with him. "Oh my god!" I scream covering my mouth, tears raining out of my eyes like a monsoon. "Dan! No!" I shout dropping to my knees. Dan had a gun in his hand and he was so cold... Dan is dead! There's a note beside his dead body. I pick up the note, it read,


Dear Phil,


      Yes I knew you'd be the one who finds this first... Or at least the first one who finds this and cares... Or maybe you don't care... I'm not sure anymore. I'm sorry... I couldn't do it anymore. It just hurts so much... You don't hear it but I cry everyday... And being a Youtuber doesn't fucking help! I'm in to far deep. Being depressed but there's no reason to be. But I wear the mask. I wear the mask for you and Youtube. I wear the mask because I don't want people to see how bad it hurts... How bad I'm damaged... I'm tired of acting okay... Tired of acting like those tears and those suicidal thoughts never happened... Tired of acting like I didn't hurt myself on purpose... This is my only place of freedom. Death. I'm sorry Phil. I really love you... But that's why. I'm doing this... I'm only going to bearing you down... I don't want to hurt you... I'm sorry... Goodbye Phil, I'll love you forever.


       - Dan


        "Oh my god! No! Dan! No!" I cried out. "I could've helped you! I could've fixed you!" I cried out more. I sob for what seems to be hours on end. I finally stand up and kiss his cold forehead. "I'll love you forever too Phil." I say sobbing once more. I dial 911 and tell them what happened, now they're on their way. Then when I thought it couldn't get any worse it starts to rain. I cry out more now. Why did this have to happen! I look up at the sky and drop to my knees "WWWHHHHHHHYYYYYYYY?!?!?!" I shouted crying. The police man out a hand on my shoulder and looked down. "It's gonna be alright son." He says patting my shoulder. I watch as they put him on a guarder. They put him in the truck and shut the doors.



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