It had been about two weeks, and I could finally breath. The ache for Zayn was still there, and the hurt from Harry was too. But as I sat on the beach in San Diego with Liam, and he sipped a cocktail, looking over at me with his sunglasses down and shirt of, it left.
I had received two text messages from Harry, telling me that I hope you’re okay, and Hope sends her love. That didn’t even sting as much as it should have done. Maybe when you’re on the other side of the world from someone you love, and with someone who is brutally honesty with a certain charm, the air becomes clean.
Zayn had called me once, and hearing Perrie in the back ground had twisted his knife in, he told me she was trying to find a dress, and it reminded me of all the times he would stare at me as I stepped into a dress, his deep brown eyes glazing my body in a thick caramel, were they doing that with her?
I would never let anyone look at me that way again, not even Zayn.
“Where’s your mind wandered off to?” Liam smirked over, sitting up a little bit higher. “Home.” I sighed, and shook my head, pushing my hair back from my face with my glasses. “You’re getting into dangerous territory their.” he stood up, and nodded for me to walk with him.
We walked down the beach, letting our feet fall in the sand. Holding out shoes in the other, I felt as though we should be holding hands, and lovingly staring at each other, it would have been perfect. We just didn’t love each other though. We did, but not how we needed too.
“So, we’ve done a week here, where do you want me to whisk you away to next?” Liam turned to me, “Maybe you should choose?” I suggested, he shrugged, “I don’t mind.” he told me, “We can hold out here for a little while more.”, I nodded.
“Maybe we could…” and then a ball knocked the back of me, and I heard a group of people laugh, two people jogged over as Liam helped me up.
“Sorry about that.” someone spoke, I looked up at Liam then, who had pushed out his chest and squared up to this guy. “Chill dude, I was just apologising.” the boy held his hands in defence. I looked over at him, and he had wings tattooed along his chest, and then two full sleeves of coloured trees, and animals. A mop of dirty blonde, almost brown hair, a black eyebrow stud.
Liam could probably take him.
“Then say it like you mean it.” Liam pushed the boys shoulders back, steam coming from his ears. Then everything changed, as if a ghost had just touched Liam, or maybe it was an angel.
“Liam, please tell me that isn’t you?” I heard a soft voice, it was delicate, and looked a little bit frightened. She was about 5’7, curly brown hair, and cinnamon skin, her eyes were blue, and she was slender, but curvy.
Liam was frozen, he dropped his hands, and turned slowly. “Rosie?” he spoke, and she gulped before taking a step towards him, and reaching her hand to his face, and his eyes closed as he felt her touch, she ran her fingers over his lips. “It is you.” she spoke, and wrapped her arms around him, and he had never seemed so calm, his arms absorbed her, and enclosed her, he was not letting her go.
“Why don’t we go and grab a drink?” Liam spoke to her, and then glanced at me. “I’ll wait here, it looks like you have some catching up to do.” I smile, “Are you sure?” he frowned, “I’ll find my way back to the hotel.” I patted his shoulder, he kissed my cheek, “I will see you soon, Angel.” he winked at me, and Rosie stiffened up a bit, but they soon left.
“Please, tell me that isn’t your boyfriend?” the animal inked boy asked, with a chuckle. “Oh Liam? No, he’s… a friend.” I wasn’t sure what the word was. What do you call a boy who is always picking you up, holding you when you cry, taking you to extravagant places, and you occasionally kiss. I suppose that’s my own manipulated version of a friend.
“I’m Adam.” he smiled at me, and he had dimples, that looked all too familiar. “I’m Brook.” I force out a smile. “Sorry about that whole ball thing.” he put his hand behind his neck and rubbed it. He kicked the ball back to his friends, and I laughed as they all shouted obscene things at us. “Ignore them, they are dicks.” he chuckled.
“I know this might seem a little odd, but considering my friend has just left with yours why don’t we go for a drink until they are done?” he spoke, and I looked back. I suppose I passed the leaving with strangers about 3 years ago, I nodded.
I waited up by the bar for him as he ran and got his shirt. I couldn’t possibly have attracted someone else, can’t they see my scars, surely they can see it in my eyes. I had managed to cover them up, hiding them with a long slowly falling salmon skirt.
Adam came back, and I smiled at him. “Sorry, they were all asking about you.” he chuckled, and ordered our drinks, “How did you know my order?” I raised my eyebrows, “I just guessed.” he smirked, “Or is that your move with all the girls?” I grinned, he gasped, “Are you suggesting I am a player, Brook?” he leaned in a bit closer, I shrugged as my double vodka and coke was placed in front of me, and I raised it to my lips, “Not at all.” I said.
“So, how long have you known Liam?” he asked, I shrugged. “So much has happened, that I have forgotten.” I say, “What about Rosie?” I added, he laughed, “She’s my sister.” he told me, laughing. I saw it now, their tanned skin, blu eyes, same chilled face.
“Do you go to University?” he asked me, and I paused.
Now was my chance. I could be the person I always wanted to be. I could pretend that I didn’t have this past behind me. I was a good clean girl. My parents hadn’t ‘died’. My brother hadn’t stabbed me. The love of my life hadn’t bet on me. I hadn’t fallen. I hadn’t been Brook Green. I wasn’t me. I was someone else. I could be the person I should have been before that one night that I crossed paths with the one and only Zayn Malik.
“Yeah, but I’ve just taken a year out. I’m from the UK, so I wanted to travel for a little bit.” I grin, “I was going to ask about your accent. What do you study?” he asked me. “English Literature.” I laughed, and he nodded. “I go to San Diego state.” he studied, “Studying?” I lean in again, “Photography and Music.” I spoke, “So you’re creative?” I stare at this ordinary boy wide eyed, “I suppose I am, but so are you, I mean you must write if you read?” he laughed, “Oh no, I enjoy a book, I could never write one, my life isn’t interesting enough to write one on.” I tell him, and he smirked, “I find that hard to believe.”
I found it hard to believe too.
“Family?” I asked him. “My parents own their own shop, they sell cakes, and sweets, and all-american things.” he was so ordinarily perfect that it scared me, but it was actually a nice kind of scared. “I have a younger sister, she’s into bugs, she’s a little weird, and you’ve met my other sister. Other than that, nothing really.” he told me, “Are your parents like you? All tattooed, and bad looking?” I pull my lips into half a smile, he nodded.
“Now, your family?” he asked. I couldn’t completely lie. My family weren’t exactly going to be his kind of people, but then again, if he wanted to know, and I wanted him to be convinced, I had to make sure that some was the truth.
“My parents died when I was younger, in a car crash. It was just me and brother, but we had a falling out over a guy that I was seeing, and we don’t really talk anymore. Other than that, my friends are my family.” I smile, see, I wasn’t completely lying. “Shit, you’ve had it hard. What are your friends like?” he asked.
“Well, I lived with one of them for a long time, and he scared me at first, but I feel in love with him. That’s the boy that my brother didn’t like, but he was good. In his own way, he was. He did some bad things, and hurt me in ways that he shouldn’t have, but you know, I’m not all that goo myself. But, er… Sorry, you probably didn’t need to know that.” I blush, he looked down at me, with a loving look, “I want to know, I wouldn’t ask otherwise, I can cope.” he laughed.
“Well, then there are four other boys that lived with us. Liam, Louis, Niall and Harry. They were all Zayn’s friends. I presume you know about Liam?” I laughed, and he nodded. “Yeah, he was trouble, which tells me that you are going to be.” he said, I nodded, “I am.”.
“What shit did you do when you were with that other guy?” he asked, like he would need to know for a future reference, “I… fuck, it’s so bad… this guy had made so many mistakes, and hurt me and then one of his friends just looked after me, and we got closer and we slept together a couple of times, but I felt awful. Then we all just agreed to be friends. Now they are both dating someone, and I am out here with Liam, looking for some kind of purpose.” I sigh.
“You’ve had it hard. I don’t think any less of you, I mean I don’t know you. But, I know what it’s like. I did some bad things with the last girl I was into, her friend made a pass at me, and I should have said no, but fuck, when your drunk and pretty girl makes a pass at you, if your not in love, theres no saying no.” he told me.
“You’re really honest.” I spoke, and bowed my head a little in shame, “So are you.” he lifted my chin up.
We carried on. I told him that Harry was a banker, and that him and Hope were going to get married. I told him Niall was studying music too. He told me they’d have to meet up. I told him about Louis and how he just couldn’t hold down a job, but he’d been and got a degree in biology. I didn’t talk about Zayn, I couldn’t lie about him, I just said he was with someone called Perrie.
“So, how long are you here for?” he got a little nervous, “A little while more.” I smile. “I want to take you on a date, and maybe not hit you with a ball on this one.” he told me, and I laughed, and covered my mouth as I laughed too loud, “That’s cute.” he muttered to himself. “I’d like that.” I smile, “Saturday? Anything in particular?” he asked, “Saturday is good, and I don’t mind. Anything.” I shrug.
“I’ll need your number.” he held his hand out for my phone, I placed it in it. “There.” he had just sent at text to himself. “I can’t believe I am doing this again.” I said and smiled.
I liked him though. It was a burning hot passion that roared like the fires of the deep, it wasn’t a love. It was stirring little light in the dark, he didn’t have to touch me to make me shake, he just had to speak. I got that nervous butterfly feeling that devours your stomach, the high school crush. I noticed, this persona that I had created was a person I liked. I had the boys in my life, but none of the horrible deeds that accompanied them.
I was, for a brief moment in time, normal. I was the Brook that I wanted to be.
I made it back to the hotel in one peace, smiling and feeling as if I was gliding along the cool marble floor. It was abut 7pm, I ordered room service. Glanced at my phone.
Well, that was a quick 4 hours, wasn’t it? x
I bit down on my lip smiling, grinning of the idea that he was still thinking of that time, he was perfect. He looked like he’d be bad, and I knew somewhere he was. I got good a telling when someone was, but he was beautiful. He had something pure running through his veins.
Did it? It dragged a little, I think. ;) x
It went on for about half an hour, until I tapped the wrong name, and it sent saying.
Adam, don’t worry, I’ll love it. xx
It had been twenty minutes, and he still didn’t reply. I checked, and saw I had sent it to Harry. I gulped, quickly sent it to Adam. Then saw a text received from Harry.
Who the fuck is Adam.
I had a feeling. Being with someone ordinary wasn’t going to be easy going for everyone.
- Sorry I haven't updated in so long, A-levels are ruining my life, and having a few home issues, but I will try to make this a lot more regular because I'm have withdrawal symptoms.