I sit down with James, as Niall excuses himself to flirt with the brunette by the other side of the bar. “Two more” James told the bar tender, pointing to our empty glasses. “What happened?” James turned to me.
“You saw what happened, he lied again” I spoke.
“I hate to say I told you so” he told me.
“Then don’t say it” I snapped at him, and he smirked bringing his new glass to his lips.
“What now?” I asked him, and he shrugged.
“Your not involved” he spoke.
“That wasn’t the deal” I turned to him.
“Sorry” he uttered, I rolled my eyes, because I realised he was trying to wind me up, and it was working. We both knew I would find some way to get involved. “Can I ask you a personal Question?” he asked me.
“Your going to anyway” I tell him, and he chuckled a little, and his eyes looked to Niall.
“Why didn’t you stay with Niall, he seems so much more… your type” he told me, and I looked at the blonde boy who was smirking at this girl, and I sighed.
“You know sometimes I think I should of tried to get him back, things would of been so much simpler then” I tell him.
“You’ve had chances to, so why haven’t you?” he presses.
“Because then I think of how I feel with Zayn, and you just can’t repeat that feeling” I tell him again.
“I don’t know” I then laugh.
“I suppose I am just waiting for the day that I can say we made it” I say and finish of the rest of my drink.
“How many more of them do I have to buy you before you tell me everything” he smiled, and I looked to the empty glass, with little ice cubes in the bottom.
“Seven” I smirk. “What about you, James?” I asked, nodding for the bartender to leave the bottle with us.
“What about me?” he asked me, and I smiled softly.
“Your story, how did you get to being a FBI agent” I whispered.
“I was a police officer, then I got moved up” he smiled at me.
“I mean right from the start” I tell him.
“I was raised in a normal home, two parents, one little sister” he told me.
“How old is your sister?” I asked him.
“Same as you” he spoke, and I smile.
“How old are you?” I asked him.
“23” he smiled.
“Okay so how many more drinks do I have to get you before you tell me about everything?” I smirked, and he laughed.
“Seven” he told me, like I had told him.
We sat there for the next half an hour, and he started to loosen up with me, and actually smile, like really smile.
“Okay so answer me this?” he began, slightly slurred. “Your a pretty good looking girl, Minus your current cuts and bruises” he told me, and I laughed slightly offended, but the alcohol made me unaware of the insult.
“Why would you stay here, with all those thugs, you could get any guy you want” he told me, and I smiled at him.
“Are you trying to hit on me?” I laughed at him, and he shook his head.
“No, but it wouldn’t be such a crime if I was” he grinned back at me, and crinkles formed by his eyes.
“I am use to people doing it now” I tell him, and take the bottle and pour the last drop out, and James waves for another bottle.
Niall had disappeared with a girl, the same one from before. “You know James” I whispered, as he poured his eyes into mine, “You are the kind of guy I would warn my daughters about” I tell him.
“Is that a good thing?” he asked me.
“Make your own mind up on that one” I tell him.
“So come on, don’t change the subject, why have you just stayed?” he asked me.
I shrugged, “I don’t know, really” I spoke, “Suppose when you love someone, you’d give up everything to be with them, and I do love Zayn” I tell him.
“Is that why you were going to marry his best friend?” he asked me, with a serious face that cracked up into laughter, and I laughed back at the un-funny situation.
“I don’t know, I thought it would just fix everything if I was with a “Good Guy” , wasn’t I wrong” I spoke, cracking open the new bottle of jack that had been put in front of us.
“See two failed marriages, and you still believe in love?” he asked me.
“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t do the whole marriage thing again” I smiled up at him, and took the glass between my lips.
“What? You said you were in love with Zayn?” he told me.
“Yeah, but marriage is just over rated” I shrug.
“What a positive outlook” he snickered.
“I think we have been through so much, and though bad and good things have happened, I wouldn’t want to tie any of it off with a wedding, and start fresh, forget all the things that got us to this point” I explain.
“Even when you intoxicated, you still seem to make perfect sense” he told me. I smiled down into my glass.
“What about your relationships?” I asked him, “Any ever gone up in flames?” I ask, and he shook his head.
“I only care about three things Brook, Cars, Money, and Girls… I have all three of them, I don’t need a relationship, it is just going to tie me down, I mean I am in my prime!” he exclaimed and I laughed at him. “
Your just like Zayn” I spoke, shaking my head lightly.
“What?” he asked, sounding offended.
“Don’t be offended, thats the boy I am after all in love with” I tell him.
“Are you trying to tell me your in love with me?” he smirked, and I laugh shaking my head.
“No, don’t flatter yourself - but there was a time when that was Zayn’s attitude” I spoke.
“What and because you changed him, you think your just going to change me?” he asked me, with a lopsided grin.
“Well, I changed Zayn for the better, Harry for the worse, who knows what way you would go” I laughed softly.
We sat in the bar, talking for more hours.
“Sun will be up soon” James told me, and I smiled softly.
“Has it really been that long?” I say, looking to my phone, seeing its 5:34am.
“Maybe we should get back before people actually realise we have gone” he says, and stands up a little shaky, and I laugh at his drunken state that now matches my own. “Maybe we should call a cab” he spoke.
“No, let’s walk” I say, and James throws his credit-card at the bartender, and enters his pin with great care. We leave then and step outside, and the sun is slowly rising. We walk side by side, finding our way home.
“Let’s take the long way” I say, and he nodded.
“Are you scared?” he asked me, and I shook my head. “Really?” he asked me, and I nodded, “Well… I don’t know, Zayn wouldn’t like me being alone drunk with a boy, let alone you” I smirked softly.
“You seem to like breaking the rules” he told me.
“No, I just have an unhealthy habit of doing it” I shrug.
“Do we even know what happened with Niall?” he asked me.
“He left with some slut” I say, and he laughed at me.
“Any girl you meet that leaves with the boys, you call a slut, you really don’t like people touching what is yours do you?” he asked me, and I shrugged.
“I’m possessive” I say.
We walk in a little more silence.
“So tell me about your little sister” I say.
“She’s a lot like you, her name is Hope” he told me.
“Like me? God help her” I look to him.
I pause, and then turn to him.
“You know, you need to keep her safe, never turn your back on her, no matter how many mistakes she makes, no matter what goes wrong you need to keep her by your side” I say momentarily becoming sober.
“You sound like you know what its like to be abandoned by a brother” he spoke.
“Yeah” I nod softly, and untuck my shirt, showing him the two scars either side on my hips, “My brother stabbed me” I spoke, “Quiet literally” I say to him, and he reached for my scars, and his fingertips were cold on my warm skin.
“I won’t stab my sister” he looked to me, and I coughed awkwardly, and then step back from himself.
“Good, it never really puts you on the best of terms” I say with a slight chuckle.
“Okay” he says, and we carry on walking then in pure silence.
It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, it was calm, the early birds were singing, and the sun was rising. We finally reached the fields leading the the house that was meant to be mine and Zayn’s future.
Then we step in, and the warm smell of coffee hits me, and it sobers me up slightly, and I feel a little light headed. James closed the door, it was now 6:45. How long had we been walking in a happy silence?
“Brook?” I heard, and James looked to me.
“Think we might be in trouble” he purred in my ear.
I walked forward to the kitchen, where Liam, Tiff and Zayn were sat around the table, Zayn was at his feet when he saw. I walked further in, James stood leaning against the door frame.
Zayn ignored me, and walked up to James, and dominated over him, though they were the same height, James may of even been a little taller.
“You dare take my girlfriend out to see her, ex again, with out my permission, your going have hell to pay” he seethed at James, James smirked, his drunkenness still showing.
James looked to me, “She is okay, isn’t she?” James smirked.
“It’s not your job to keep her safe, sorry… she’s mine” Zayn snapped.
“Brook, would you go upstairs” Zayn turned to me, and I shook my head.
“No” I sway slightly.
“Brook, don’t test my patience” he sighed, and pinched his nose.
“I had a right to go out, I am sorry Zayn but I don’t need your permission” I say, and he walked over to me, with his eyes focused on mine.
Then when he was close to me, I looked up at him, and he grabbed my jaw so I had to stay focused on him, “Your drunk” he spoke.
“I’m not!” I defend as he moved away from me with annoyance.
“How do you know about any of this, anyway?” James stepped further in.
“Niall came in drunk too” Liam spoke up.
“I can’t believe you, you know what, it makes me even gladder for what I have done” Zayn seethed.
“What?” I asked him, then Liam stood up.
“Why don’t you two go and talk about that upstairs” Liam spoke.
“And you, why you would take someone in her state to a bar, after she would of clearly of been hurt because Harry fucked up yet again!…” Zayn spoke and then turned to me, “I told him you couldn’t trust him didn’t I?! I told you he would only hurt you again, and you didn’t listen, when are you going to realise that I am right” he spoke.
“I knew you were right Zayn, Why do you think I brought Niall and James with me” I say,
“You should of brought me, intact you should of put yourself in that position in the first place” he told me angrily.
“I would of, but I thought he should have one more chance, because what if he was telling the truth, and you lost it” I spoke.
“Then he would of got what he deserved” he snapped at me.
“Nothing happened Zayn, so leave it, don’t bother being mad, there isn’t anything to be mad at” I say, “Nothing to be mad at?!” he yelled.
“You left in the middle of the night, to see your ex that almost killed you, and there was probably a moment where you felt like everything was perfect and you could get him back… didn’t you? There was one split second you thought, “Hey… Maybe he can be mine again”, there was, wasn’t there?!” he shouted at me, “and then you go out and get drunk with some guy that had clearly got a thing for you, you don’t call, you stay out until 6:30 the next morning, what isn’t there to be mad at there?!” he boomed, stepping closer to me yelling my face, and I looked to the floor.
“I am sick of saying sorry” I whispered.
“Your sick of saying it, because you’ve said it that much, it means nothing any more” he lowered his voice to my ear.
I pulled back to look up at him, “Five o’clock this after noon, your going to see a councillor, I hired one, I think you need help Brook, and you won’t let me help you, you push Liam away, the only person that has helped you before is now on the other side” he spoke talking about Harry, “I just really don’t know what do you anymore, Brook” he sighed, and the silence in the room was unbearable as the three people watched the events unfold. “I am running out of ideas of what to do with you” he says to me, “I can’t watch you destroy yourself, not like this, not anymore” he whispered.
“So you think, that me talking to a complete strangers about my problems is going to make this better? Zayn they will think I am mad, if I tell them what really goes on in my head, they will send me away” I say to him.
“Well you won’t talk to me about what is going on, and your so closed of, you’ve wrapped yourself in your thoughts, and they are all tied together, and wrapped in one, I couldn’t understand you even if I tried harder than I already am” he told me.
“You’ve given up on me” I say, and run my fingers through my hair.
“No, I just care about you so much, and I can love the person your becoming, and that is hurting me so much, and I know if I hadn’t of left then none of this would of happened, but what happened when I came back was under your own control, not mine” he said.
I shake, and my eyes begin to drop with tears. “Give us a minute guys” Zayn utters, and makes everyone leave.
“I will stop” I whispered.
“You’ve already said that once, Brook” he said.
“I am sorry, I am just finding all of this so hard… I am scared that I am going to loose you again, that one of the boys will get hurt again, that I will loose myself… that even when we fix everything, things will break again… I am so scared of stopping to breath, because when I stop I have to think, and I think about all the bad things that happened, and I am scared they are going to happen again” I say, and tears spill.
“It won’t happen again, I won’t let it, but the girl your becoming, the girl that needs a drink to pass the day by, the girl that has to lie to me, the girl that sneaks about, that isn’t you… and It’s you I love, not the person I made you into… I made you into this person” he whispered.
“Don’t blame yourself, It was me” I say, and he shook his head.
“If I hadn’t of left” he whispered again, and he changed again, and touched my face, he wasn’t mad, he was scared too.
“I will be here until the demons come and take you away from me” he spoke, and pulled me closer. I smiled softly, and gulped, putting my hand at the back of his head, so out foreheads were pressed.
“I won’t let those demons anywhere near me with out a fight” I whispered, and he let out a shaky breath.
“Your my only reason to breath, Brook, you know that right? If I didn’t I have you… I don’t think I would want to be here” he told me.
“Please don’t ever say that” I tell him, and shudder to think of a world with out this boy in.
“How do you love me after all I have done to you?” I asked him.
“I could ask you the same thing” he told me, and smiled.
“I am serious” I whispered.
“I have told you, It wasn’t my choice to fall in love with you, it just happened, like a force of nature, I had no control of it” he says softly.
“You’ll see the councillor, won’t you?” he asked me, and I sighed, knowing it wouldn’t work. Knowing I wouldn’t want to unload my life problems, and dilemmas on a stranger.
“Yes” I uttered.
I did know, I didn’t want to loose Zayn and I wasn’t going to, if this is what he wanted, then it would be what I would do.
“Thank you” he told me.
“Are we always going to do this?” I asked.
“Fight and then make up?” he asked, and I nod.
“It is what we do best, isn’t it?” he asked me, and I smiled laughing softly.
“We do it very well” I say.
“I love you” I then add on, and kiss his lips softly.
Zayn pulled back.
“I would love to kiss you, but you taste of liquor, and though it tastes wonderful, its not the taste I like on you” he told me.
“Sorry” I blush softly, and he ran his thumb over my cheek.
“How about, you go and shower… take your time, I make you coffee, and we climb into bed, and you show me the innocent little girl that I fell in love with, and you let me fuck you senseless?” he smirked at me, and I giggled, and looked up at him.
“Those eyes” he whispered, and I was reminded of the lake with Harry, I push away the thought.
“Loose your innocence” he ordered me.
“I thought you liked it?” I smirk up at him, and he ran his thumb over my bottom lip.
“I do, but knowing I can’t have you for a least an hour, drives me mad” he utters, bitting his lip, and I laugh.
I unbutton the shirt I am wearing and stop it to the floor, and his eyes wander, I put my arms around his neck.
“I promise…” I look in his eyes, then place a kiss on his neck, and move to ear, “I will be quick” I smirk, and he groaned as I kissed him once more, and I smile walking along. Loose you innocence? I lost it the minute I met him.
What do we think of James now?! Brook and Zayn still find ways to break my heart. >,< I need that in my life!! Hope you enjoyed!! x