I wake up, the sun light beaming through the window above my bed as I shift uncomfortably, letting out a loud sigh.
It happened last night... To me.
I don't know where I should feel happy or destroyed. I mean... It was pretty amazing... But that's not the point. I lost my virginity to him, Harry.
He had control of the whole thing and he knew exactly what to do and how to do it.
He practically had to cup my mouth in one of his hands just so my screams and moans wouldn't be too loud.
At the end, I felt kind of embarrassed cause I barely knew how to do anything. I mean... He did all the hard work. I just sat back and watched it all happen.
I have flashbacks of what happened last night and I immediately try to distract myself.
Immediately realizing that it was just last night, my eyes widen.
I quickly shoot my head, looking over to my side and I know Harry is not there. I'm kind of relieved cause I mean... I probably have a puffy and pale face.
I can't really say Harry and I are fuck buddies or not.. It was only a one time thing.
I'm obviously never doing that again. With him. Last night I just really needed someone and he was my easy way out.
Thinking about last night, I can say he is reallllllly sexy with a fucked up attitude.
I don't know what's wrong with me but since last night, I see him differently... Like I don't wanna throw up when I see his face.. But I still don't wanna run into him. Ever again.
It's just embarrassing to know he saw the part of me no one else closer than Scott saw.
I sink my teeth into my bottom lip, embarrassed. How could a girl as nerdy and shy as me, let this happen.
My eyes shift from side to side, me day dreaming as I stare at the plain white ceiling. I'm not a fucking virgin anymore.
This is definitely not the way I planned to lose my virginity as I thought it would be with Scott and it would be all about us taking things to the next level and being happy and in love.
Obviously last night wasn't as good and well planned but it was enough to get me distracted from Scott's polite confession about his contact with that whore that I don't even know the name of. Ew.
I violently throw my blanket off my bed watching it spread on the wooden floor.
I can say I'm still really sad and angry
I use all my strength to get up and finally after a few tries, I drag myself out of my bed, my whole body aching from all of the activities I attended last night. Ugh, I'm embarrassed.
I watch my feet slowly drag themselves along the carpeted floor.
don't know if I wanna continue this friends with benefits thing with Harry. I mean practically, we aren't even friends. I don't know where that leaves us.
But I don't regret last night as much as I thought I would... Maybe because I don't have anyone else to stop me from doing it. I don't have a boyfriend nor do I have parents.
I say it'll be a once in a while thing.. I don't want to look like a desperate slut.
I know Harry won't tell anyone what we did cause well.. I don't want him to and because his friends will probably never talk to him after he confesses.. Well it won't be surprising. I'm not popular, social, pretty or talented in anything so I'm pretty much known as the invisible girl I guess.. With the smallest circle of friends in the world.
I don't do friends so well.. It's either enemies or random people I talk to for a while and just pretend like I don't know them later on. I'm fine with being alone. It's my thing I guess..
But on the other hand, Harry is one of the most popular guys because of his pick up skills and well everything that girls see in him. Which I definitely don't and never will.
I'm interrupted by an angry male voice, my head shooting up.
I mumble, only to see Harry.. This explains my luck.
His hands are up in the air but once he realizes it's the virgin he slept with last night, he drops them to his sides.
His frustrated face transitions into a cocky look with a smirk plastered on his lips.
"How are you, today?"
He asks, me surprised but as soon as I'm about to respond, I understand what his intention of asking that was and I bite my tongue.
"Not funny, Harry"
I giggle, unable to hold back my laughter. I push at his shoulder lightly, he quickly reaches for my wrist and holds it tightly, staring into my eyes with his emerald eyes.
He stays quiet, just smirking as I try to read his mind but I'm unable to do so.
I frown my eyes and lick my lips, struggling to jerk off his hand but that only makes our chests stick together, me running out of breath.
His looks satisfied as he knows I am too weak to get out of his tight grip, but I still continue, feeling his eyes on me and I know his smirking.
I demand, using my other free hand to open his curled up fingers around my wrist.
I can tell he is laughing at me and that just frustrates me more.
I look across the hall as I try to distract Harry. Just then, his eyes widen before he lets go, pushing me into his dorm room.
He shuts the door behind me and I start to laugh, ignoring how violent his push was. At least he let go.
I take the time I have to look around the room once I'm in, not bothering to tell him it was just a distraction.
It's very messy, clothes lying everywhere.. On the bed, the floor and the chairs.
Only seconds after, the door handle twists and the same figure with brown curls stands in front of the door, a lazy look plastered on his face.
He chuckles and shakes his head as he enters, me stepping back as I laugh, pointing at him.
"I'm smarter than you think"
I wink, as I watch him walk closer to me with every second.
His steps are so light and quiet that I can't hear a thing but his heavy breathing.
I can say I'm frozen by now.. Knowing where things are heading to.
He stops once his close enough, his breath hitting my skin like a breeze. I stare into his green eyes, getting lost in them.
Our bodies are only inches away and I can see the hunger in his eyes once they travel up and down my body, inch by inch.
I know that I can't act like a coward, so I grab him by the collar of his smooth cotton shirt and pull him closer to me.
He looks a bit taken back but he leans down to reach my face, cupping it in his hands and our lips meet.
His plants soft kisses from my lips, down to my neck, me shivering at his touch.
He pushes me against the wall behind me, my back kind of uncomfortable against the hard support.
I wince but Harry is too focused on showering me with wet kisses that he doesn't stop.
He sucks on my soft spot, me letting out a breath as I relax but soon, I grab his now messy curly locks and pull his face up.
He looks confused but waits, me throwing him on the bed that is covered fully with clothes, making it hard to know if it's even a bed.
He smirks at me once his back bounces on the bed, me spreading my legs to sit on his hips. His legs are dangling from the bed as I take my shirt off.
"You're fucking sexy"
He gets mesmerized by the amount of skin showing.
I flash a smirk, accepting the compliment as he sits up, our chests touching.
He cups my boobs through my bra in his hands. He doesn't take a second to reach for the back of bra and unhooks it immediately, the straps falling down my arms.
His hands cup my boobs once more, his thumbs creating motion circles on my nipples as I hold back the moans that are threatening to escape my mouth.