10. Plans behind my back
Mrs. Stanford came out to me and Tess. We played with her dolls outside the doll house and Tess didn't seemed to care that her mother came.
"Maggie!" she said, almost certainly. "We'll talk!"
I swallowed, I stood up and I followed her at a distance from Tess. We put ourselves under a tree and she looked at me seriously.
"My husband has decided to let you read at university. I admit that I'm slightly against it because we have to put Tess in the first place."
I nodded weakly.
She smiled weakly.
"You're a good nanny and I will write you a letter, which you should take with you. When you looking for job, ask them to call me and I promise I will praise you."
"Should I start studying now?"
"No, in a few weeks. We have contacts and we have made sure that you get into the business school. I know you want to look forward and it's a good training where you will learn all about the money and the world."
Okay, I should be happy, but there were many things that didn't fit into that plan.
"I can't afford it yet?"
She smiled and she looked towards the house. Niall sat out in the yard and read the newspaper, as usual.
"He's over there have added money and we share in the overhead. We have paid everything for you."
She laughed a little bit.
"Yes, I must admit that even I was surprised, but I think he wants to show that he has the heart in the right place. We barely know him and he seems to care about you."
I didn't like that as slipped out of her mouth. Okay, my stomach tingled and I knew he wanted my best, but still.
"So you fire me now?"
"About a week!" she said as if it were a simple matter. "You move to an apartment that I have found for you, and it's located near the university. Maybe you can come and visit us one day?"
I just wanted to cry. I had only a week to say goodbye to Tess and I didn't know what to say. "I'll stop here!" and leaving her with a broken heart.
"Aren't you happy?" Niall asked. I was about to slug him.
"You think everything is so simple?"
He was surprised and he just stared at me.
"What do you mean?"
I sighed and I felt the anger come.
"Yes, I'm grateful but I have a child that will be broken when I leave the house. She'll cry and she'll think it's her fault that I go."
Niall fell silent. He just stared at me and he pondered. I felt myself almost gave up hope that he would understand. I left him and walked towards the house, right as it was Niall came running after me.
"She can come and visit you?" ¨
I spun around and I gave him a quick glance.
"Mrs. Stanford wont allow it."
"I can convince her?"
"Niall, you can't always get what you want!"
Niall sighed and he looked like he was really sorry that he had made the wrong choice.
"But you want to educate yourself and you want to leave the family?"
I shook my head.
"You know nothing about me."
He was insecure and I felt that he took my hand in his.
"But when you leave them, you get to see me. I can help you and take care of you?"
"Where do you fit in?"
He smiled uncertainly and he looked down at my hand.
"I thought that when you aren't working for them, you can see me?"
I understood what his plans and I sighed.
"SO this is about you? Not that I want to become something more than just a nanny?"
He swallowed and he blushed.
"Maybe, but ..." he sighed and he looked at me again. "I want to get to know you and I want you to fulfill your desires and I want to be on your journey."
He released my hand, when one of the staff showed up. Niall blushed and he looked down at his hands again.
"I apologize that I got the wrong solution to everything." he whispered. "But I promise I wont disappoint you."
He then left me. I stood like a question mark. I hadn't demanded anything from him and yet he talked about that he didn't want to disappoint me? I followed him with my eyes and in my imagination did he really love me, but in my real thoughts, he was just a rich guy who thought he owned the world.