We cuddled up together on the couch, all three of us. I leaned against Thomas (which made me swell with happiness) and Arthur leaned against me, shoulder against shoulder. We covered ourselves with blankets and Arthur started the movie
I forgot to veto against scary movies. This one was filled with blood and guts and jump scares, and I had to keep my hand tightly locked with Thomas’. I had a slight idea that the two of them had somehow planned this, because through the entire movie, Arthur was trying very hard not to laugh and smile. Thomas mostly laughed at me, though. I shrieked at the slightest scare and turned my head away in disgust every time something that should have been inside a human somehow ended up outside the body. He held my hand all the way through it, running his thumb across my hand when I clutched his so hard that it started hurting him.
By the end of the movie I felt shaky and uncomfortable from the nastiness. I felt pretty damn good about being snuggled up with Thomas and Arthur. I was tired, though. The darkness was heavy outside, pushing against the windows. Slowly we stretched, and Arthur yawned.
“I’m gonna go to bed now. Goodnight,” he said, getting up from the couch. He leaned back while standing, stretching his spine. I heard it cracking.
“Goodnight. See you tomorrow.” I told him.
“Sleep well.” Thomas said, waving at him with his free hand. Arthur saluted him with two fingers from his temple. Then he went out of the living room, leaving us alone. I leaned my head on Thomas’ shoulder and closed my eyes. He pressed his lips to the edge of my hairline.
“I like this.” I said, my voice low and rather raspy from all the shrieking.
“Me too. You’re the best girlfriend ever, you know.” He said, squeezing me gently.
I straightened up, my heart skipping a beat. I sat up, leaning away to look at him.
“Girlfriend?” I asked him, eyebrows raised. He looked at me, obviously confused.
“Yeah, I kinda guessed that’s what we were.” He said.
“We didn’t really agree on it yet, though. I don’t know… It’s just weird. I’ve never been called that before.” I smiled a little at him. He smiled back and wrapped his arms around me tenderly, but only holding me, not pulling me to him, so that we would still be able to look at each other.
“Ellie,” he said, his voice so soft and gentle that I felt heavy somewhere behind my belly. “Please let me call you my girlfriend. Please let me have that honour. I am completely and utterly in love with you, and there is nothing in the world I rather would want than you.” He looked me straight in the eye. I felt faint. The words hit me like bullets hutting the bulls eye. But they did not hurt me. They woke me up. I had never felt so real or alive.
I raised my hands and framed his face with them. His eyes looked glassy, like he was on the edge of tears. I didn’t blame him - I felt the tears rise in my own eyes as well.
“Thomas-“ I almost choked on his name. “There is nothing in the world I rather would call mine.” Why did we both get so emotional suddenly? The tears broke out of our eyes and rolled down our cheeks at the same time, in perfect sync. “You had me from the very first day, you know. I don’t know how, but you did.” Then he did pull me close. He crushed my body to his, pushed his lips against mine, cutting of whatever else I could have said.
That was when it happened. I got breathless, and not in the way you should because you’re kissing. In the my-lungs-are-not-cooperating-way. I started hyperventilating and pulled away from him, though I stayed in his arms. I need them around me, and as he realised that something was wrong, he kept them around me. I still couldn’t breathe.
I couldn’t breathe. And it hurt.
My heart was beating fiercely, as if it could keep my going even if my lungs failed me. And I knew that something was really wrong. I thought of the way my body reacted when I opened the oven. I remembered all the times my heart had skipped a beat or started beating furiously, all of which I had written off as nothing. And how my entire body was hurting now.
I felt rather than heard Thomas scream for Arthur. All I really could hear was the rush of blood in my ears and the thunder of my heart, beating at my ribcage. But all I really could think of by then was how much I hurt.
Then everything went black and I entered blissful nothingness.