Witnessing the person you believed liked you kissing another man is worse than any pain inflicted by a blunt object. I've broken my arm before and even that amount of physical pain is nothing compared to the heart break I'm going through.
I had originally came to see if my friend Ernie was busy tonight, turns out I was walking in at the very moment my girlfriend was lip-locking with some douche bag boy with curly hair. I had to remain calm though, I couldn't let it be obvious I had feelings for a student.
So I turned away and walked up to Ernie trying my hardest to ignore the dark haired girl staring at me as she kissed another. The last I had looked her bright blue eyes were widely staring at me. It seemed as if they were pleading with me, but I knew better. She had someone else, I was just her play thing and I let her use me.
It's funny, people would assume that since I'm older I would be the one using her. Not the other way around. But in this situation she was the bad guy, and I was the good guy.
I went home with a knot in my stomach. I felt like someone had punched me straight in the gut and kicked me over and over. I just wanted to go home and never get up. I've never felt this way before. I've never felt so sick to my stomach from a girl. Especially a girl who was taboo.
I walked straight into my house, keeping my eyes cast low so they wouldn't catch a glimpse of the apartment where all of this began. I'm beginning to hate where I live.
I should have never gone to that apartment last Saturday. It was a mistake, a huge one too. If I had just stayed in my house. My life would be completely different today, I would never have met Ace and I wouldn't be a heart-broken loser sitting on his couch with a tub of ice cream between his knees. It couldn't look any sadder than this.
I felt like utter sh*t. I should have told Niall about Harry and explained to him what I was planning on doing. But of course I didn't and of course I'm to chicken to just end it with Harry. So this is why I'm sitting in mine and Savannah's room after Harry left having made up some lame excuse why I couldn't go to lunch. I have a feeling Savannah is catching on to my avoiding Harry but is too polite to say anything.
I should tell her, but I can't. I could but it would put Niall in jeopardy and I don't want that. I really like Niall, more than I think I like Harry. It's obvious that if you're in a relationship with one person and can still find that you like another you were never attracted to the first person in the correct ways. I just find it difficult to end it with Harry since he is basically the first man I loved.
I sat on my bed pulling out an old flannel button up that I think belonged to Harry at one point but I ended up keeping it for myself in the end. I pulled it on and took my pants off laying down in bed. Savannah sat at the desk working on English homework that I wish I didn't have to do.
"How's the tongue?" Savannah asked. I shrugged not really in the mood to talk. She sighed, I heard her spin around in the computer chair and face me completely.
"Spill it or I'll call up Harry and tell him you're on for dinner" She threatened. I sat straight up and eyed her down carefully.
"You wouldn't" I challenged narrowing my eyes in her direction. She smirked crossing her arms over her chest.
"I would. And I am unless you tell me what the hell is going on. You've been acting weird for the past week now and I know I just met you but I can tell something is wrong." She said trying to sound friendlier towards the end of her words. I laid back down, should I tell her?
"It's complicated Savannah. I don't think I should tell you. I don't know what the outcome would be if I were to tell you" I sighed probably confusing her more than she already is. I could practically hear her rolling her eyes at me.
"Just tell me. It's not like you're f*cking our English teacher." She laughed. My eyes widened and I tried not to move. I was dead silent and so was she once she realized I wasn't laughing along with her. Her eyes seemed to grow in size as she took in my reaction.
"You and Mr. Horan..." She whispered. I gulped, she can't know. I shouldn't have said anything, I should have done a better job at hiding it. She leaned back a look of thought falling across her soft features.
"I should have seen this coming." She muttered shrugging and going back to her homework like it was the most natural thing in the world. I was shocked, utterly flabbergasted that she wasn't flipping out or scolding me about cheating on Harry.
"Wait, you're not upset? Or grossed out?" I asked sitting up completely. Savannah shook her head no. I gave her a look as if to say 'Why?' She laughed spinning in her chair slowly.
"I never told you how Louis and I got together did I?" She smiled looking off into the distance as she thought herself and her boyfriend.
"Nope. Should I ask?" I said sounding hesitant. I don't know if I want to know how they met but part of me did.
"Yeah, it wasn't that bad. I mean sure what he did to Eleanor wasn't good but it all worked out in good time." She said looking back to me. I nodded my head to encourage her to tell me the story. She opened her mouth and went into how she had met Louis her last year of high school at Starbucks. She happened to work there and he and his current girlfriend at the moment came into the shop. She told me how cute he was and how she noticed he couldn't stop looking at her.
She told me how the rest of the month was spent with Louis and the mysterious girl with long wavy brown hair kept coming in. They always ordered the same drinks and Louis would always stare at her. \
"Then after about a month or so, he came in on his own. Without Eleanor." Savannah smiled as she thought about that day.
"What did he do?" I asked intrigued now. It sounds adorable how they met aside from the fact Louis seemed to have a girlfriend at the moment and was staring at other women.
"Well he ordered his drink, but I had it memorized so I rattled it off to him before he could. He smiled and looked down at the counter before glancing back up at me and saying 'let me take you to coffee' which I laughed at since we're in a coffee shop and he turned bright red when he realized what he said." She laughed smiling widely. I find it adorable how she still blushed and smiles at this story even though it sounds to be a while ago.
"So did you say yes?" I asked. She chuckled nodding her head.
"Well yeah, duh. But I knew he had a girlfriend so I asked him about it and he said he didn't know what to do about her. He made a lot of mistakes after that. We had a lot of rough patches and well eventually she found out we were seeing each other and she wasn't happy. But we kind of all sat down and had a mutual agreement that she and he weren't happy together long before he met me. And I guess it just all worked out in the end. El and I are actually pretty good friends now, it was awkward for Louis at first but he's over it." Savannah explained.
That's actually pretty amazing that Savannah and Louis went through all of that and are still together. From this one little story I grew hope, hope that maybe Harry and I wouldn't end on a bad note. Hope that Niall and I could end up happy together. Maybe. So I snatched my phone up and went to the bathroom.
Finally the person I was hoping for picked up.
"Hello?" A deep gravelly voice called through. I don't think I checked what time it was but he sounded out of breath. Like he had been running, he must have been at the gym.
"Harry, can we talk?" I asked softly.
Of course I wake up late this morning. I ended up not being able to sleep last night and slept through my alarm. I jumped out of bed as fast as I could and threw on the first thing I saw. Which was a pair of ripped skinny jeans and a plain white T-shirt. I know it's not very professional, but I don't have time.
I ran out to the living room and grabbed my leather jacket and helmet rushing out to my car. I didn't have time to eat breakfast so my stomach was growling. My mind was racing but somehow it still found a way to focus on one girl, Ace.
I drove past the speed limit and was happy I didn't get pulled over. But I made it just in time for the bell to ring. I sprinted to my classroom panting as I made it inside. My class was already waiting for me as I got inside. I went to the front of the class and set my things down.
"Sorry I'm late guys I missed my alarm." I said trying to catch my breath. The class all mumbled something but I couldn't tell you what they were saying.
I looked around noticing that one dark haired girl was missing. The one girl who seemed to be occupying all my thinking lately. The one girl who could make me weak at the knees with one wink. Ace wasn't here yet. But the class must go on.
I started off the class with a simple project of collecting their favorite poems. They were to analyze them and turn them into me at the end of class. I set them to work and walked to my desk trying to get organized and stop thinking about Ace...
About half an hour into the lesson the door bursts open and in comes the devil herself. Ace. My heart skipped at her beauty. Her hair was nearly thrown up on the top of her head in a messy bun. She was carrying a tray of Starbucks in one hand and her books in the other. She had on denim jeans and a large plaid button up. I stopped, that shirt had to belong to the curly haired boy. She wouldn't have done that to me would she? She wouldn't have slept with him. Right?
"Sorry I'm late Mr. Horan." She muttered handing me a pass she must have gotten from the office. I just nodded placing the note in a pile on my desk. I didn't know what else to do, she didn't seem fazed by the events that took place only yesterday.
She sat down beside Savannah who filled her in on the task. The rest of class went by quickly. Eventually the bell rang and everyone left, even Ace. I was alone in my classroom until the next class filed in. I tried to focus the rest of the day but it was hard. Finally it was lunch.
When the lunch bell rang I walked out of my classroom and down the hall to another. If she could do it I could too. I said to myself as I pushed open Kimberly's door and walked inside. She turned from the spot she was standing in beside her desk and smiled at me softly.
"Hello Niall" She grinned. I wasted no time I walked straight over to her and pushed her up against her desk locking my lips to hers.
Ace POV (Sorry for the POV whiplash it's needed)
After my second period I found Savannah and Louis walking to the benches where we sat. Louis was talking about needing to visit Miss Mason.
"I need to hand in my late work from yesterday. Come with?" He begged throwing in a puppy dog look that everyone knew wasn't needed because Savannah would do anything for him.
"Yeah sure. Want to come Ace?" She asked looking to me. I shrugged, might as well. I need to get my mind off Niall. It's obvious I can't keep cheating on Harry and after last night's conversation with him I'm even more lost.
"Harry, can we talk?" I asked softly sitting on the toilet. There was the sound of a door opening and closing on the other end before he responded to my question.
"Yes of course." He muttered. I took a deep shaky breath. I need to come clean, I have to. But as I blurted out what I needed to say so did he.
"I cheated on you" We both said in unison. My eyes bulged, did he just say what I think he just said?
"Uh" He mumbled obviously as confused as I was at this point.
"So we both, uh, cheated..." I muttered. Harry hummed in agreement to my statement. We were both quiet.
"I can't really be mad at you then. It wouldn't be fair of me" He stated only making my stomach twist more.
"I know what you mean." I sighed. I don't know what else to say or what else to do.
"Should we try again? Since us both messed up? Try again and start off new, a clean slate?" Harry suggested. I wanted to say no, everything was screaming no but my mouth didn't say no, instead the word tumbled out.
Savannah and Louis and I are all walking down the halls to Miss Mason's class. They were discussing what they were going to do this weekend while I was trying to keep my mind away from Niall and Harry. I don't know what to do, I still like Niall and I still want to be with him. But I can't bring myself to end it with Harry.
We all walked up to the English classroom. Louis released Savannah's hand and opened the door gasping as we all three stepped inside. Leaning up against the desk was Niall and Miss Mason. Her shirt was off leaving her in just her black lace bra and pencil skirt. My eyes welled up. So this is what it was like for him.
Never have I ever felt so much pain. I ran out of the classroom before anyone could say anything. I ended up bumping into someone with coffee. It spilled all over me and them. I apologized quickly but kept running. Tears was rushing down my cheeks as I finally made it to my car, only to find that I didn't have my keys, they were inside.
Great I locked myself out of my car too. What a great f*cking day.