9. Chapter 9
Today is the day that I will be staying over at my parents for a while. I gave my quick goodbyes to everyone and got in my car, putting my bags in the trunk. I didn't feel like driving at all today. I mean I don't think anyone would after finding out that there loved one had cancer just the day before. It wasn't going to be a good day and I was sure of it. This is just all surreal. I sidetracked my thoughts and put the key into the ignition. I started pulling out of the driveway then onto the highway. I guess I was going to slow because I got a couple honks from cars behind me, I didn't care anyway they could just go around me. I tried not to think much so I could focus on the road but all I kept thinking of was if my dad was doing okay or not. I didn't realize there was a semi truck right behind me so I started driving faster then eventually turning into another lane.
After about fifty minutes of none stop driving I turned off to an exit and made my way down a road that lead to my parents house. I tried stopping my tears from falling when I got into the driveway. I put my car into park. I took my keys out and just sat there for a couple minutes letting it all out until I finally dried my eyes. I removed my bags from the trunk and walked up the steps. I was about to knock when suddenly the door swung open and my dad's arms were wide open like he used to when I gave him hugs. I dropped the bags not caring at all then fell into his arms. I could tell he was having pain because he winced when I was holding on so tight. I apologized and backed away feeling way more sorry then I said I was. "Let me get your bags" I shook my head and tried to take my bags from his hands. "Dad, let me get them. I don't want you to be in more pain" He sighed then let go of the bags. I carried them up to my bedroom. When I was finished unpacking everything I entered the living room downstairs where my parents were waiting for me. I hesitantly sat in the chair across in the room from them. I didn't want to talk about my dad having cancer because even thinking about it made me upset. "Sooo" My mum said trying to comfort me with a smile but I ignored it. We stayed silent for a few minutes. "Your dad has liver cancer. He's going to start getting treatment soon so you need to start being more careful around him" She talked to me like I was a ten year old. I got it because yes I did need to be careful but I knew what I was doing. It was also like she almost didn't care but I knew this was just my mind talking and I shouldn't be listening even though I did anyway. I sat there in silence not bothering to speak when I stood up and then ran to my room. When I shut the door to my room quietly I let all of the feeling rush out me and let the voices in my head talk to me again, caring what they said. I felt like my life was over. My dad was going to start getting treatment all the time and there was nothing I could do to stop it. He was eventually going to start to feel more pain and I didn't even want to think what would happen to him next. My back slid down the fall as I cupped my face into my hands. I couldn't even cry anymore I just kept my face in my hands not looking up even when the door opened. Someone sat in front of me but I still didn't want to know who it was. "Carter" my dad said removing my hands from my face. I didn't say anything back, nor did I want to. All I did was lean my head on his shoulder and hugged him trying not to hug him too hard because of the pain. I could tell he was trying to hug back also but it was even hard for him to do that. I started to cry into his shoulder. He rubbed my back for a couple minutes as I cried and cried. "Carter?" He said pulling me away from his shoulder. I nodded and he started speaking again. "I will get through this I promise, and so will you. I'm going to do everything in my power to prevent it from getting worse. One day I will get to walk out of those hospital doors and say I kicked cancer's ass" I let out a little laugh and wiped some of my tears away. He took my hand and helped me stand up. "You should probably get some sleep" I told my dad. He nodded his head then I hugged him for the fourth time today. He started walking down the hall to his bedroom until I stopped him.
"Dad?" He turned around. "Please don't ever leave me behind?" I asked him. "I don't plan on it"