3. Day 2
I woke up just laying on the bed, the thought of you surrounded my mind. A voice started screaming and telling me how it was all my fault. How I deserve to die. Tears began to fall down my cheeks. I pulled at my hair and hit my head just hoping it would stop but it didn't.
The yelling only got harsher. It told me I was 'useless' and that 'I needed to die.' I was to weak so I gave in. I ran to the bathroom and looked in the cabinets for something sharp. I couldn't find anything.
I ran back into the room. The voices only got louder and louder. I ran over to my desk and grabbed a sharpener. I put it on the ground and stomped on it. I cut my foot and screamed out in pain. I grabbed the little blade and ran into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror and just screamed pointless things at myself.
I rolled up my sweater sleeve I was wearing and put the blade on my skin. I slid it once across my skin. The yelling in my head started to get lower. With every cut I did the voice would yelled the reason for it. The first reason was for your death. The second was for being useless and the third was for being fat. I guess the voice noticed my flaws too. I cried and looked at the blood on my wrist.
I went up against the wall and slid down it. I wish you were here. My head was pounding. I got off the ground and put the blade in the cabinet. I washed the blood off and rolled down my sleeve. I got back in bed and cried. I cried until I was asleep again.
I dreamed about our future. We were gonna get married and adopt a child. I dreamed about your beauty and your sense of humor.
God I miss you.