Suicide - 5S0S/1D Fan-Fic

"Please tell the boys how much I will miss them. Hug them every day for me. I can't stand the thought of being parted from them, but I have to do this. I'm sorry xxx"

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1. Prolouge

At least once in our life times we wish we could just die. Well, for me, I've wished it more than once. I wish for it every single day that goes by. I hate myself, I hate my life, and I practically hate everything. I hate all the silly, ugly little scars that scatter around my body. I'm pathetic. I'm a no-body. Louis, Harry, Niall, Zayn, Liam, Ashton, Luke, Calum and Michael have tried for the past 2 years to try and make me see differently. It hasn't worked. I still see the same, boring, broken girl in the mirror that I've seen for the past 10 years.

 

I'm Madison, or Maddie as the guys call me. I'm 18 and Louis is my big brother. Well, ever since Jay and Dan got married and adopted me anyway. It's the 22 of July, 2016. It's been 2 years today since I got adopted and I can't keep this up any more. Behind Dan and Jay's back, the Tomlinson sisters are evil girls who all hate me for some reason. The only person I have to talk to is Perrie but she's on tour a lot or with Zayn and they're 3 kids. Yeah, they got married last year and have two adorable little girls and one little boy. Triplets of course.

 

Since Liam and Danielle broke up, I haven't seen her once. She was the only person I trusted before I met Perrie. Even Eleanor hates me. Around the guys, she and the Tomlinson sisters are all nice and loving towards me, but as soon as the boys turn their backs, they turn ruthless.

 

You think they'd be nice to me, well they aren't. I was best friends with Lottie before Dan said he was going to adopt me. My parent's died in a house fire just before my 8th birthday, and I've known Dan for a long time, so he suggested to adopt me with Jay and she gladly agreed to. I thought it was the best thing to ever happen to me in my life... Well, I couldn't have been more wrong in my life.

 

I place the note that I had written not 5 minutes earlier on my bed as tears started pricking in my eyes. 'You have to do this. No one knows what's going on and no one will believe you unless you do this!' The voice in my head started taunting me like it has since last night when I finally decided that I have had enough. I grabbed the chair from in Lottie's room and positioned it in the centre of my room which was right next to hers. The rope on my bed, now in my trembling hands as I knotted the end around the air conditioner fan above me. I left the loop hanging freely and I stood there, the silence of the room torturing me. I started feeling sick as I stood on the chair, the room spinning. Voices of the boys in my head telling me not to do this. And other voices fighting them out saying I should. It was voices of the fans, El and Tomlinson sisters. All screaming for me to just end it already.

 

"ARGH! I CAN'T DO THIS!!" I screamed on the top of my lungs as tears started falling like rain drops in a bad storm. I heard a load of cars outside the house come to a stop as someone frantically tried to open the front door. I knew it would be the boys first to the door considering they are the only ones who have even cared about me from the beginning. I grabbed the rope and placed it under my chin, heart pounding against my rip-cage and breathing increasing. I closed my eyes as the door swung open downstairs, hitting the wall in the process as I heard footsteps descend the staircase.

 

"1...2...3..." And with that, I jumped. The rope tightening against my neck as an army of people, my closest friends and family, stood in the doorway in shock...

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