Matthew Cooper's party was tomorrow and I had nothing to wear, and that was the most important thing going through my head. I needed to look perfect. You can't just show up at the hottest guy in the school's party looking like a piece of shit.
It was the day of the party & Matt had come up to me in the hallway to ask if I was actually going to his party for once. At first I couldn't find the words to say but by the time I did Hilary Banks came up behind him and hugged him, gaining his full attention. The sneaky bitch sure knows how to get revenge & all just because I didn't want to be friends with her. "Marina... Matt!! Oh Matt, tonight is going to be amazing, better then all the other party's of yours I've been too," she said smirking directly at me, her lanky arms still tightly wrapped around his waist. I could've killed her, right then, and right there. I've liked Matt since pre school and if she thinks that this is going to make anything better or worse it's not because this is just off the fucking scale of 'better' or 'worse'.
The night came quickly & thank god for that. I could feel my stomach turning and filling with butterflies as I approached the door. Fuck man I shouldn't be here I should just turn around and keep walking further and further away from the house, but as the idea popped up the door opened and, and he was there. I couldn't turn back, I couldn't walk away, but I just didn't know what to say, and then he spoke. "You look stunning...wow Marina, really you do, just wow." The hottest guy ever, that've I liked for the longest time ever just told me I looked stunning & all I could do was blush. What the fuck is wrong with human emotions, what the hell God, where are you like really what the fuck are you doing. Are you drinking wine with Jesus because I'm here fucking up & you're not helping. You know what? Fuck human emotions and fuck you too.
We went inside, he took my coat for me, he offered me a drink, all the usual shit that happens happened. We sat down. Silently and making no eye contact whatsoever until he spoke. "Marina," he said, "I've liked you for as long as I can remember and Hilary's been trying to help me tell you because I didn't know how to before and I'm just really glad you came tonight. I fell in love with you Reen & I still am in love with you." I didn't know what to say or what to do but a big smile came across my face so I just jumped on him and hugged him. I jumped on Matt and told him I liked him too and then he just stared at me. Did I say something wrong? Was I not meant to hug him or jump on him? But then it happened. He kissed me and it was amazing.
People arrived one by one, then four by four, and the amount increased again and again within the span of 10 minutes. I couldn't stop thinking about the kiss. Our kiss. I was waiting for Hilary to walk through the door but she never did. She said she was coming. Was it to make me jealous? The bitch. Wait, was it so Matt & I could be alone for a while? I went to Matt and asked why she wasn't here and he shrugged and said "I dunno 'Reen' somewhere better to be probably." I laughed at the thought, but I still wanted to see her so I kissed Matt goodbye ignoring the 'ooo's' & 'aww's' from throughout the house and left.
4076 New Street Blvd. I still remembered the address after 8 years. We stopped talking when we were 10 but maybe for the better. I went up to the door and spent a minute debating doorbell, or knock. Just as I was about to knock Hilary opened the door. She stood in front of me in a pink, short, skin tight dress looking stunning like usual but I couldn't speak. I hugged her, I missed her, she was my best friend and it's been 8 long years of hatred and for what. For nothing. She's had my back this whole time with Matt trying to hook us up and all I could do was talk about how shit of a friend she was and damn did I feel like the bitch. "Thank you," I finally said.
"For what?" Hilary replied.
"For everything you've done to help Matt & I, yanno..." It went silent and I finished, "he kissed me earlier after he confessed his feelings I confessed mine, and he kissed me, and I, I just wanted to thank you. Really. For everything."
"Oh my god Reen that's so cute, ugh he finally grew a sac, the whimp. All he did was talk about you but he'd never admit to me that he liked you cause he thought we were pretending to argue so I could be your secret spy. He's such a loser but I'm glad you two are happy." She laughed.
It felt really good talking to Hilary again. I missed having a friend and it was great. Just great.
I text Matt and told him everything, but he didn't reply. I said bye to Hilary and started to head back to the party. Still irritated by the read and no reply off Matt. I kept telling myself he was just busy or having fun at the party. I walked in and I was right. He was busy. He was having fun. He was busy having fun with another girl on his couch the fucking bastard. I took off my heels and threw them at him the lying, cheating bastard. I don't know what I was thinking, I threw the heels at him & then I punch this random girl till she's bleeding and I can't help but think 'what the fuck is wrong with me,' and Hilary saw it all.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you crazy?" Matt said.
"What's wrong with me? Matt you told me you loved me & now you're fucking some girl on your couch. That's what's wrong with me."
I could feel myself chocking on my words trying to hold back my tears but I couldn't. I turned and walked out with everyone staring at me. I shoved past Hilary and seconds later heard her say "Take a photo next time you assholes, it'll last longer. Get the fuck out of here, parties over. Matt. Kitchen. Now." But I just kept walking. Walking quicker and quicker and then running. The tears now running down my face, my heart screaming at my brain and everything just hurt.
I got home looking like a raccoon, my dad sat in the corner of the room and after tonight I could not be bothered with his bullshit.
"What the fuck happened to you, you look uglier than usual."
"Fuck you." I said uneasily as I walked up the stairs. "Fuck you, you bastard you're never there for me. Go drink. That's all your good at." I slammed the door and nothing more was said that night.