the discovery

+16 - Narry fanfiction - the discovery

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15. Hesitation about us

Niall began to work and the first day of school was all like one big hurricane. Niall was able to keep track of classes and he tried to do his best.

 

"So you have a family?" asked the principal, when the teachers ate food. Niall smiled.
"At home in Ireland!" he said honestly. "I come from there so the whole family lives there."
The headmaster smiled.
"And do you have a girlfriend?"
Niall was startled. He froze and he didn't know what to say. How do you explained that you were gay?
"No?" he said because it wasn't a lie. He had a boyfriend, not a girlfriend. It was as if he himself didn't know what he was feeling and he didn't know what he would drop out, about his private life.

 

Harry came home to Niall when he had stopped working. Niall thought about to talk with Harry about what to say at the work, but he didn't dare. Instead Niall smiled, talked like normal and he couldn't deal with the issue.
"Now know my work that I have you." Harry said suddenly, and he smiled big. "I even called home to mom and she's really happy for me. I told her everything." 
Niall blushed. 
"Everything?" 
Harry laughed and he took Nialls hand. 
"No I didn't tell her that we made love, but I told her that you and I have loved each other in four years and that we found each other again." 
Niall swallowed. He looked down at their hands. Niall felt like a fool and he wished that he could be as brave as Harry. 
"Good?" 
Harry laughed and he kissed Niall quickly on the cheek. 
"I know what you're thinking, darling, but take it easy. You will tell about us to your mom, but do it when you're ready?"

 

--

 

Harry was happy. His whole life had a sentence and he couldn't understand that he had once been sitting at home and complaining that he was alone. All the time wanted fate to bring Harry and Niall together. Now that they were together, no one could stop them, and the whole Harry was in seventh heaven.

 

"So Niall is the right guy?" asked Louis uncertain. "He hasn't been with a guy before, and now he's open with this?" 
Harry sighed. 
"He hasn't told his mom about us, but I know he will." 
Louis hesitated. 
"And he told you that?" 
Harry nodded. He didn't care what Louis said. Niall was the right guy and they would forever be a couple. Nonetheless seemed Louis suspicious. 
"He just discovered that he was gay?" 
Harry sighed. 
"Yes, after the camp on the island!"
It didn't matter what Harry said. Louis didn't believe that it would hold, and he looked at Harry with suspecting eyes. 
"You can't just think about such a thing, and four years later, believing that everything will be all right. Niall needs to tell his mother." 
Harry sighed, and he ran his hand through his hair. 
"Stop it!" he got colder out. "This is my problem and I trust him. He's just not sure what to say to his family."
Louis snorted. 
"Don't you hear how bad it sounds? He can just telling her like it is, how hard can it be?" 
Harry looked at Louis and he frowned. 
"It's not easy to admit you're gay. I have many friends who took time to admit it to their families. Niall's not an exception and I know that..." 
Louis leaned toward Harry. 
"Force him!"
"NO!"
Louis looked at Harry a long time and he sighed deeply. 
"I promise you that no one at school knows about the fact that Niall's gay. He hasn't told a single person." 
Harry hesitated. 
"Well he has?" 
Louis didn't agree. 
"Ask him then, if he has told his colleagues that he's together with a guy? Just ask him!"
Harry was silent. He wasn't sure. 
"And what does it matter?" 
Louis leaned back on the couch and he smiled weakly. 
"You can't be gay, have a lover and tell everyone else that your heterosexual?" 
"He hasn't said that hes heterosexual!" 
Louis smiled. 
"So ask him?"

 

Harry didn't dare ask Niall. Partly because he was afraid of the truth, and partly because he didn't want to know. Still, the question came up one evening. Niall stood and cooked pasta. Harry came into the kitchen and he put himself behind Niall, the Irishman back. He took his arms around his stomach and kissed him on the neck. Niall giggled and he smiled big. 
"I cook food... stop it!" 
Harry smiled. 
"And?" he whispered hoarsely. "I just want to be with my boyfriend." 
Niall laughed a little bit. Harry put his head against Nialls shoulder and he let his hands caress his stomach. He looked down on the stove and immediately dived Louis voice up in his head. Harry hesitated, but he couldn't help but ask. 
"Have you told about us at your job?" 
Niall froze. 
"Not yet."  
"Why?" 
"They haven't asked and no one has time to talk about such things."
Harry swallowed. 
"And if they had asked, had you answered that you're mine?" 
Niall hesitate, but he nodded. 
"So of course I had told them about you." 
Harry heard that he lied. There was something in Nialls voice and he hesitated. 
"I don't believe you." 
Niall sighed. 
"Come on Harry. I can't just run around and tell them all that I have a boyfriend?" 
Harry felt a lump in his stomach. 
"I did that?" 
Niall sighed and he moved around in the pot. 
"But I'm not like you and I do it when I want and when it's convenient." 
Harry released him and backed off a few steps. 
"Are you ashamed?"
Niall continued to look down into the pot. He was stiff all over and Harry saw at his back that he didn't like the topic of the conversation. 
"No!" 
Still, Harry didn't trust him. 
"When are you going to call home and tell?" 
Niall was annoyed. 
"Stop it, Harry, I will, but when I want to." 
Harry could feel his whole body became weak. He realized that Louis was right. Niall just wanted to have Harry as a toy and not as anything more. 
"So we're not together?" 
Niall snorted. 
"Stupid question, we are..." 
Harry interrupted him, 
"But tell everyone you know about us then?" he almost shouted. Harry felt the tears came and he left the kitchen quickly. He ran into Nialls toilet and he locked the door. He felt his whole body shook and he realized that Niall would never talk about their relationship.

 

There was a knock on the toilet door. 
"Please, darling, I'll tell it at work, but I can't now because I'm home." 
Harry blew his nose in paper and he sat down on the toilet seat. 
"No, you're just lying. You only want me as a secret and you don't want to tell the truth to everyone else." 
Niall sighed. 
"No, that's not true!" 
Harry wiped away tears. 
"Well, Louis said you aren't ready for this and he's right?" 
Silence and then Niall seemed almost sad. 
"He doesn't know me?" 
Harry blew his nose again. 
"Neither do I. Who are you?"
Niall sighed. Harry heard that he sat down on the floor outside the door. 
"Please trust me?" 
Harry sighed. 
"I don't want to be just something that you pick up when you think it's okay." 
Niall seemed to ponder. 
"I'll tell everyone about us." 
"Why haven't you done it yet? So why should I trust you?" 
Niall hesitated again. Harry heard he moved and it sounded like he was leaning against the door. 
"I'm a coward, Harry. I'm not like you and I always ponder over what others will say." 
Harry swallowed. 
"But it's just to tell the truth and why do you care what others think?" 
"I don't know!" 
Harry sobbed. 
"Promise to tell." 
"I promise, once you come out from the toilet."

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