Everything I Need

Makenzie, a rich girl living in a huge home in California has everything except love. Once she runs totally wild at a party, her whole life gets upside down. Now, she has a baby on the way and has to manage being on her own. When she crosses paths with famous boy band member, Liam Payne, will she also be able to find love after all?

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9. My Blessing

Although everything was going pretty well, and James let me sleep, I was kept awake at night by the same fear every night- the fear of never being loved. I haven't had any action in over 10 months, and since I was a teenage girl still, it was getting a little hard. Shaking it off, I tiptoed into my sons room, and saw that he was stirring a little bit. I picked him up, held him close, and watched him open his tiny, sparkly sky blue eyes, just like his technical father. I hoped for his sake that one day I could find a man who loved and protected me, and was a real father to James.

"Someday, we'll find a place here in this world", I whispered, kissing the top of his head. I was almost certain he had no idea what I was saying, but I softly played with the blonde curls growing on his head and he smiled at me. snuggling into my chest, he fell asleep. I loved feeling his warmth against my skin, knowing that he was a part of me. At this moment, I made a promise to myself and to my baby, that I would always be there for him no matter what, and do everything I can to make him happy. Let him do all the activities he wants, and to always cheer him on.

After gently lying him down in his crib, I walked into my room, plopping on my bed. I eventually fell asleep, and woke up to my alarm clock. Five am. I sprung out of bed, checking on James who was still sound asleep. He looks absolutely adorable when he sleeps. I took a picture of him, kissed the top of his head, and then walked away. I headed into the bathroom, turning some music on and attempting to straighten my blonde hair. I put on some makeup, decided what to wear, and then picked up James, who had just woken up to feed him quick.

"James, I know it's hard but mommy doesn't have time for this!" I said, knowing it was helpless.

"I have to feed you silly baby. Just try for me, please!"

I got really frustrated, and started crying.

"Please. For mommy." I begged, and surprisingly, it worked. It's like he can understand me. After I was done feeding him, I grabbed something or eat for myself and waited for Ashley's mom to get here. She was watching James today for me.

When she got there, I grabbed my things, have James one last kiss, and headed out the door. The thing I loved most about living in California is that it was never totally freezing, and since it was April, it was really nice out. Today was my birthday.

When I got to school, Ashley surprised me with Starbucks and balloons.

"I love you so much! Happy birthday!", she said.

"I'll give you your card and present at lunch!", she said, practically skipping down the hallway.

"Okay! I can't wait!", I said smiling, and giving her a hug.

"And thank you for everything!", I said and she shook it off. "Aw no problem!"

Once the day came to an end, I had a quick meeting with my US History teacher, and then was on my long walk home. When I opened the door, and turned the lights on, Ashley, her mom, the rest of the cheer squad, and my oldest sister all jumped out yelling "Surprise".

There were balloons and streamers everywhere, and James was clapping his hands, wearing a little party hat. Ash handed him to me,

and I held him close.

"Thank you for making my birthday special!", I said to everyone, especially my little James.

Everyone stayed for awhile, and when they left, Ashley announced her and Tiffany were going to sleep over and take me and James to the beach tomorrow. They collapsed, Tiffany on the couch, and Ashley in the bed next to me. I held James for a little bit longer, fed him without there being any issue, and put him in his crib so he could go to sleep. I crawled into bed next to Ashley falling asleep with a smile on my face.

The next morning, Ashley woke me up.

"You and your son are sleepy heads!", Ash said and I laughed. "He is a lot like his momma!"

I put on a bikini, pleased that I lost most of my baby weight already, and slipped on a summery dress over it, brushing my hair and leaving it natural. Then, I grabbed a bag to bring some things for James. I grabbed a pair of swim trunks, swim diapers, a baseball hat, sunscreen, and a towel. Taking him out of his crib, I changed his diaper, put a swimming diaper on him, and his little swim trunks, a cute tank top with surfboards on it, lathered him in sunscreen, and scooped him up.

He was so tiny it scared me that I would hurt him sometimes, but I did my best to always be gentle.

When we finally headed into Ashley's car for the beach, I felt relieved.

We set out beach towels, chairs, and James in his baby carrier underneath an umbrella, and finally I could relax. When I took my dress off, Ashley

commented saying "Damn! didn't know your boobs could get any bigger!"

"Oh, Its because I nurse him." I replied, and she nodded as if thinking "that makes sense".

I cracked open a soda from the cooler and laid down to tan.

"I've never relaxed since the night he was made", I said and they both laughed.

"Yeah, well, I'm glad that everything happened because out of all that shit, you ended up with such a beautiful baby boy who is a blessing to have In everyone's lives, especially yours", Tiffany said and I nodded, agreeing with every word she said. James was the best thing that's ever happened to me.

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