At the end, it was nothing but a lie.

Nobody ever thought that I, would be the one that got sick.

Jolie Raven is a girl of many talents, and she is on the right way to live a strong and complete life. Until the doctor diagnoses her with cancer, stage 2. Her world is slowly falling apart, and she is keeping it all a secret. Changing into a person she never wanted to be. She ends up being the biggest liar of everyone.

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3. Hell in my world.

I wake up in the middle of the night, screaming from pain in my stomach. I can't sit up and look panicking around for Niall, who isn't here anymore. The door burst open and in comes my mom and dad. I began crying and the pain was unbearable, I didn't hear anything they said, it's was sounds. My dad disappeared out of the room and my brother was fast in his place, it didn't take long for the sounds to come back and me hearing the sound of the sirens. I never felt a pain this strong or.. flammable in my body, I wanted to scream again but nothing came out.. I just felt like my energy never had been there. My mom kept holding my hand, and was going to until she knew I were in good hands. The sirens stopped and then I hear the loud steps up the stairs, I see two paramedics come in my door and starting checking me. They lifted me over on the stretcher, rushing me down the stairs and out of the house.

"We will be there soon!" I hear my dad yell. His voice breaking.

I feel like closing my eyes, but I need to stay conscious. They got me into the ambulance and shut the door, the sirens was on when we drove faster than I ever tried to the hospital. It really didn't take long. At no time we were at the hospital, me being rushed in for a check. I really have to fight to keep awake, that is how bad the pain is.

"18 year old, strong pain in the stomach. Been sick all day with vomit and now fever." the paramedic said.
"Drive her to room 509 emergency, I'll call the doctor to get there immediately." a nurse said.

They drove me down there, really fast. I just want it to be over! All of the sudden I was in the room, the doctor waiting for me. Putting all of the stupid needles and so on in me.

"Morphine, quickly. We have to get her an MI. Soon as possible, take a blood test right away! Where is her family?" he says.
"On their way!" I say with a soar and hoarse throat.

They look at me, like it was a miracle.

"Hurry with all the tests!" the doctor say.
"MI ready for her."
"Everything! Test her for everything!" he say, as they take me away.

After a lot of halls they finally stop, they help me up and support me to the scanner. I lie down and wait. They start the whole thing.

"Please be still the whole time Miss. Raven."

As an answer I give a thumb up. They press the button and it start to pull in. I feel the pain slowly come back. I had to fight to keep still, it was so annoying!

After an hour the MI stop, and they pull me out. Some nurses help me back in bed and they take me back to the room.

"So when will I know what it is?"
"Not so long, this is a strange cause, so they are rushing it. The blood test came back, and they couldn't find anything in that." one of them answered.
"I guess that is good news." I mumble.

I'm back in my room now, and I try to relax, but no can do. It hurts to much.

"Nurse.. can I get some pain killer!" I ask.
"I'll get the nurse.."
"Mom.." I say and turned my face to the door. "Please don't go."
"I'll just get the nurse! I'll be right back!" she says.

I cry out for her as she walks away and in comes my dad. He rushes over to me, hugging me carefully.

"Daddy.. I'm so scared." I whimper.
"It's okay love. It's okay." he says, trying to calm me.

The nurse come and gives me more painkilling, morphine I guess. My dad helps me down to lie and holds my hand until I fall asleep.

"Jolie.. Jolie Raven! The it girl, who suddenly became the who girl! Where did she go? She got sick, and left us all alone. Thank god for that."

Wait what.. Why in the name of god is Allan Carr saying that? I'm not sick.. I'm still working on my career.. What is happening?

"And here is some she left behind, not telling them anything. One Direction! Hello boys, how are you!"
"Hello Allan, good! Great actually!" Liam response.
"Good to hear Liam, what about you Niall?"

The camera turns to Niall and he looks depressed.

"Fine, perfectly fine." he says cold.
"Well Niall, it must have been hard for you. We all know you adored that girl."
"No I didn't. She were just a friend. Nothing more. And now.. Now she is a nobody." he said.

His blue eyes that's always warm and almost screaming for a hug when he see me, has changed. They are still as blue as the Turkish oceans, but now they are also as cold as Antarctica's ice and water. I feel my heart become stone and at the same time break into a million pieces as the TV shows all the boys laughing. Except for Niall, he sits there, lurking into the camera like he knows I am watching. He then shake his head and mime something, something I clearly can't translate. Then I hear everyone of the boys say it at the same time.

"I loved you, you liar."

I am shocked, I stare at the TV that is now completely blank. I try to get up, but now face that I am in a wheelchair. The screen goes black and I see my reflection. A hairless girl, thinner than any model in the world. Weaker than anyone she have ever seen and two parent's behind her screaming at each other, mute. Her brother standing beside her, pale with black circles so showing that she knows it's tearing him apart. And then she turns to see him, but all she see is the hate filling his eyes, mixed with the blame, shame, and all the bad feelings in the world. He doesn't care about her, he wishes her dead. He wishes she was never even born. That he were the only child, so that his parents wouldn't scream at each other, so he didn't have to look at the weakest person alive. His pathetic sister.

I feel so lonely right there, like I am that girl.. Which I am.. But it won't happen. It won't.. Will it.. Will I die? Am I really sick.. Or is this just a dream? Is this really happening.. Oh god.. I ruined their lives. It's all my fault, and now.. now the boys hate me.. The only boy I ever had feelings for despises me. I ruined everything.

I wake up, baked in sweat. Crying and shaking. My mom is sitting in a chair sleeping, besides my dad who is also sleeping. Holding hands.

I hear a rustling to my left and turn my head. It's Jonathan.

"Hey... sorry. Did I wake you?" he asks in a whisper.
"No.. terrible dream." I say.
"Oh.. are you okay." he asks worried.
"Besides from being here, with a horrible pain.. Yes.. Thanks for staying."
"Of course.. The weird thing is.. I woke up right before you screamed with a pain in my stomach." he says.

I look at him worried, but he shakes his head.

"Twin thing I guess!" he says smiling.

I hear a small knock and see the doctor.

"Can I come in?" he asks.
"Yes doctor." I say.

He looks worried and like he doesn't have any good news. My mom opens her eyes and wakes my dad with a shake.

"I'm afraid I have no good news Miss. Raven."

My heart sinks as he says that, my mind starts up with naming all the sicknesses that it could be.

"You have stage 2 cancer in you liver." he says.

I feel like my mouth drops.

"It has been there for a time now. We can't exactly say how long. But we will do our best to cure it." he says.

My mom starts crying right away, and I just stare at the doctor. For the first time in a long time Jonathan grabs my hand.

"I'll leave you all to.. yeah." he says and leave.

I stare at everyone in the room.

"No one can know about this." is what comes out.

I have.. Cancer.

After that, they started a lot of things. Tests on how they should beat it, and so on. Finally in the late morning they let me go home. Assuring me they would call later that day to give me my time for chemo. I just want to get home, fast. They have given me some really strong painkillers, I don't even know what it is. My dad supports me all the way to the car and helps me in, Jonathan is already in and I lay my head on his shoulder. He take my hand and hold it tight, I smile and close my eyes. Just listening to the cars engine and take in all the old smells, I really just want to lie in my bed. I didn't even realize we were home, until my door opened and my dad helped me out. He smiled at me and supported me all the way inside the house, and up to my room.

"Mom will come with some food and tea." he say.
"Thanks dad." I answer truly thankful.

Even though my family have everything because my dad is a big Co for a company, they never let me and Jonathan fly on the skies. And I never wanted to. I just pray that they wont miss me to much if it should happen. If I should die. But what am I thinking? Of course they will.. I will break their hearts, I will kill them.

I pull my cover longer up and try to hide in it, but try not to. I hear my phone beep. I take it and look at it. It's Niall. I ignore it, I don't want to answer him right now. I just want to lock myself inside these four walls forever. 5 minutes later it's beeping again. I growl low, and my mom comes in.

"Here you go love." she said.

My stomach is now the one growling!

"Thank you.. Do you know where my remote is?"
"Right here" she says and hands it to me, smiling..

I see the fear behind that smile and take the remote. I try to make it better with a smile assuring her I will fight this. She leave me and I turn on the TV, I need to find something to get this out of my head for a couple of minutes. I just turn to Disney channel.. I sit here eating, while my phone keeps beeping. I take it and look at it.

'Are you mad at me Jo-jo?:/ - Nialler'

No.. I'm afraid.

I might die!

 

In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life, it goes on. - Robert Frost.

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