1. Love is special

They say 'love is special', 'it's the best thing in the world' and I believed them like only a fool would. I had no idea how hard it was to be in love or of the damage it can cause. Sure, it's great while it lasts, or at least physically. Because I still love her, but it doesn't feel that great anymore. In fact in many ways, I wish I didn't still love her because at least that way it would be easier to deal with what I did and the fact that it was all my fault and maybe I could just let her go. But it's not that simple; it's never that simple.

It was January, the second I believe. Yes, that's right, January 2nd 2013, just last year. The first day I ever saw her. It was an amazing day, the best, but if that day had never happened, things would be a lot different. I can remember, as clear as day, she walked into my English class and my heart just stopped. It was like one of those stupid Romantic Fantasies where the girl who is way out of the average boy's league walks in as he imagines her hair blowing back and music playing in his head, for he had fallen in love. Yes, I had fallen in love. I can remember my hand shooting up when Mr Pierson asked for someone to take care of her on her first day at our school, I had no idea how stupid I looked until Stefan, my best friend, kindly informed me. I didn't care though, it meant that I got to spend all week with the prettiest girl I had ever seen and it really was worth it. That week was possibly the best of my life, I got to spend a whole week getting to know an amazing girl and she actually liked me! I'm a disaster when it comes to talking to girls, I always just say the first thing that comes into my head, which is never a good thing. But she said she liked how natural I was around her and could be myself and she thought my clumsiness with words was 'cute'. Those were the best words I'd ever heard from the best girl I'd ever met. And you know what the best part was... It didn't just last that one week! Alice - no, I'm sorry, scratch that... it hurts too much to say her name! She sat with me and Stefan and walked home from school with us every day! At first I thought she wanted something from me, I thought she was using me because she was so perfect and I'm so under average, but some how she actually liked me! As time went by and we got to know each other more and more our relationship changed a lot. By April we had started dating and become... an item. It was the first time I had ever had a girlfriend and it felt special, really special! It was amazing, the best time in my life!



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