The Dead Walking 4

(This is the 4th book in The Dead Walking series) I hate death. Its not even the fact someone died really its the after math when you look back and think "maybe I could have done something" and it just eats away at you until you cant take it anymore. And it seems no one really understands it, but you so you are left to face it alone. Just like you're left to face everything else alone now because we're all just monsters too.

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13. No Time To Explain

         We continue going diagnoly to the left for awhile. I can hear the groans in the distance as the walkers search for us. I think we will be okay. If we just stick to the plan then everything will be fine. Maybe.

     I can't stop thinking about Carl and our fight last night. I can tell he's mad. He has that kind of "look" and "voice" that he only uses when he is angry or annoyed. I doubt he would even talk to me if we hadn't needed to come up with a plan. It hurts to think about it. To know that he's mad at me. I don't want us to be fighting. I mean he is literally all I have left. But I mean what does he expect? For me to just lie and say "Yeah, life is great, I'm not dead so that's wonderful! Dying would be horrible." No. He knows me enough to know that I'm not like that.

     I mean he used to say it all the time too, that sometimes he thought it would be easier to just give up. I used to have to tell HIM that he was important and that he had to fight. Now it's all switched around... How did that happen? Maybe he's right. Maybe the old me is still in here somewhere. Maybe all it takes is for something to show me that life is worth living, because at the moment, nothing is showing me that.

     I sigh and Carl looks back at me for a moment. We only make eye contact for a second before he turns back around.

    We have been walking for awhile now. It's probably time to start heading right and making our way around them. We'll have to talk again and for some reason that makes me feel queasy. He acts different when he is angry, I mean we all act different when we are angry, but I don't really feel right around him when he's mad. I gather myself for a moment before speaking.

    "Carl..." he stops and turns around. He raises an eyebrow asking what? "We need to start heading right so we can get back on track," I explain.

   He thinks about this for a moment, like he's trying to make sure that's the best thing to do. After a moment he nods. "Okay."

   So we start going right.

 

                                                    ***************

 

     "Can we stop? I'm tired!" Melonie whines.

    I sigh. "No. We have to at least get to the road before dark," I shake my head. To be honest I would love to stop too. My ribs are stinging, from my heavy breathing. I try to take tiny breaths, but they only hurt worse. I wince and hold my side. When I look up I see Carl looking at me and I automatically try and look tuff.

     He rolls his eyes, shakes his head a little, and smirks. "Yes we can stop. We all need a break."

    I feel like smacking myself in the face. He would have made us kept going if he didn't know that I was hurting. If I would have just kept going and ignore the pain then we wouldn't be stopped. Carl knows what I am thinking too because he grabs my wrist and pulls me to the side, far enough away that Melonie and Joel can't here us.

    "Izzy. I was going to make us stop soon anyways. You need to rest if you wanna get better. And yes, I may be a little irritated with you, but I still care about you and I'm not going to let you get hurt, or to let you hurt yourself," he adds.

    I already knew this. He may be mad, but he cares so much that he still won't let anything happen to me. "I know," I whisper as I study a clump of dirt on the ground near my right foot.

    Carl puts his hand under my chin and raises my head so I am forced to look him in the eye. That hard look that masked his face earlier is gone. "I'm sorry," he tells me.

    "For what?" I demand.

    "For being such an ass," he mutters.

    "Oh my god. You're apologizing? Carl I'm the one that should be sorry, not you," I shake my head.

    "We're both acting like idiots..."

    "Yeah... I'm sorry."

    He chuckles. "Does that mean you accept?" I ask.

    He nods. "Yes. Does that mean you accept?"

    I nod. "Good," he smiles. "I don't like it when we're mad at each other."

    "Me either," I agree.

     He leans forward and kisses my forehead. "Let's get your ribs, wrapped up."

     We walk back over to Melonie and Joel. I stand there as Carl rummages through his bag. He pulls out a long strip of ace bandage. He brings it over to me and I unbutton the shirt that Carl is letting me borrow. I take it off and raise my shirt so that he can wrap it around me. He starts it and wraps it around once, then again, and again. Once he is done, I pull my shirt back down and put the button up shirt back on. It's only evening and I'm already chilly. It's going to be a cold night. Melonie will have my sweatshirt... so I'll only have this. I guess it will be okay because Carl isn't mad at me anymore so he'll keep me warm.

      "So are we going to make camp here?" I ask.

    "Well if we are going to make a fire to stay warm then we don't have time to find another place so I guess so," he shrugs.

    "I don't think that's a good idea. That group is looking for us... and a fire is just a little to obvious. We can't take the risk of them finding us... not again," I shake my head.

    He purses his lips. "You're right... I guess we'll just have to stick out for the night."

    I'm about to lay the blanket out when I hear small footsteps. I whip around just in time to see a dog step out of the trees. Black, short haired, brown eyes, comes up to my waist. It doesn't look mean. I see Carl take a step toward it and it walks toward him. I keep my hand on my pistol as I wait for it to make a move. He pats it's head and the dog rubs his face against his hand. Carl looks back at me and smiles. I smile back a little.

    Then a thought comes to me. A terrible, terrible thought. What if... that group has been tracking us with the dog... and now it's found us.

    I feel my heart start racing as I walk toward Carl. I put a hand on his shoulder and he turns around and looks at me, still smiling. His smile disappears and is replaced by worry as he sees my expression. "What's wrong?" he asks.

    "We have to get out of here. Now. We have to go," I insist.

    "Why?" he asks, confused.

    "Carl they could be tracking us with that dog... and now it's found us."

    He looks back at the dog and back at me. He has the same expression as me on his face. He grabs my hand and pulls me over to where our stuff his. I grab my bag and my weapons and Carl grabs his. "Come on," he tells Joel and Melonie.

   "What, why?" Joel asks.

   "No time to explain."

   We start to walk away, but I can here the dog start to follow, along with the sound of other people's footsteps.

  

   

   

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