His Absence


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2. Chapter 2

I knew who the person was. I-I knew him. It was Harry. He was just standing there.

"H-Harry"

I mumbled under my breath, my hands finding their way up to my mouth as I gasped in shock.

He stood there, his memorizing green eyes fixed on me, a mix of sadness and happiness in them.

I shut my eyes close, opening them once again.

"I must be dreaming"

I said to myself, once again seeing Harry stand right in front of me.

"I'm- I'm so sorry Harry"

I begged for forgiveness as confusion filled my mind, me running towards him with weak open arms as he stood there silent.

As soon as I was about to hug him, he disappeared through my body, my body heading for the floor as I was slammed against the cold marble floor.

"Oh my god"

I cried as soon as I realized that it was just in my thoughts. I couldn't have possibly met Harry once again. After that accident. After his death.

I sat up, still on the ground as I bared my face in my hands, loudly sobbing into them.

"I'm going crazy, aren't I?"

I mumbled to myself, sniffling as I looked up at the ceiling, questioning god.

"I'm sorry"

I referred to Harry as I sniffled once more before struggling to get back up to my feet, my back hurting like a bitch.

I winced as I stretched, my spine cutting through my muscles as it ached.

I wiped my soaked cheeks, my heart still beating out of my chest at the thought of what had just happened a few moments ago.

Seeing Harry just standing there, looking more than just lifeless to me was a dream come true, to be honest.

It made me feel like he was there, with me. That I wasn't alone and afraid.

But it was still all just a huge misunderstanding to my brain. He was dead but I didn't wanna accept it so soon.

What am I talking about? It's been ages since the accident. I was weak enough to even think properly.

.

.

.

I missed my parents so much. They'd left me with only a huge amount of money that couldn't buy me happiness.

They both died of cancer a year ago, 6 months before the accident when we decided to run to a new life.

Genes gave me a little slight of hope that I'd be the next to die along with them and Harry.

All of my parents' saving was for my university, but yet they died. And me being the idiot me, I got into a car accident, got depressed and ran away to California 'hoping' for a new life that'll never arrive for me.

It was all my fault that Harry died. It was the ideas and dreams that I put in his mind about California and our dreaming coming true that was his ride to death.

I deserved to die. I couldn't live like this. A depressed rich girl, living alone in California and a run away from Los Angeles without a boyfriend or husband to accompany me.

I was alone.

-flashback starts-

His finger intertwined with mine, me smiling as I observed how well they fit together.

I was wrapped around his arms like a little puppy, considering how tiny I am.

Okay I'm exaggerating. I'm pretty much as tall as Harry. Just when I wear heels. But close enough.

I could feel his chin on the top of my head as I was buried in his chest peacefully.

"Your hand fits in mine, like it's made just for me"

He sang perfectly. His voice was dreamy, mature and well-toned.

(By the way guy, I'm only using this line from their song cause it makes sense but Harry is NOT famous in this story so don't get the wrong impression)

"I love it when you sing to me"

I blushed as he pulled our hands to his lips, leaving a dry kiss on mine, our eyes meeting.

It looked exactly like how they did it in titanic. The signature move of Jack on Rose on their first meal together. How cute.

I scrunched my nose, smiling sheepishly at him as he stared at me, me getting lost in his eyes.

"Did anyone ever tell you how cute you look when you do that?"

Harry asked, lightly tapping my nose with his index finger and he chuckled.

"Well did anyone ever tell you how adorable you are when you act cheesy?"

I giggled as I pinched both his cheeks, playing with them as I stretched them out painfully.

Harry winced, his fingers wrapping around mine as he gently pulled them away, stopping me.

"No one can be as cute as you, babe"

He stated, looking down at me with a smile as I nodded my head, agreeing with him.

"No one can be as adorable as you, honeybooboo"

I laughed at what I had just called him. Who the hell calls someone that? Me.

"No one can be as cheesy as you, Serena"

Harry admitted, chuckling dryly.

"You're right, you win"

I giggled, pretending to be upset when I was not. I knew exactly what was gonna happen when he won.

"What's my price?"

He asked, waiting for a response impatiently as I bit my lip, a smirk plastered on his face soon.

I punched him jokingly in the chest, getting out of his grip once I understood what he thought I meant with that move I made.

"You're gross! Of course not!"

I scrunched my nose once again, facing him as I slouched.

"Wow, I'm offended"

Harry looked away, frowning as he pretended to sniffle, me giggling.

"Alright, come here"

I cupped his face in my hands as I lean in, closing my eyes and peck his lips slowly and romantically, chills going up my spine.

There was something about slow kisses that made me feel those chills. Slow makes it romantic and romantic makes it just ten times better.

My eyes fluttered open, both of us smiling as I licked my lips.

"That was so worth it"

Harry blushed like a girl, quickly looking away as he fixed his curls, me just staring at how cute he was.

-flashback ends-

After the accident, there hasn't been one day that I spent without crying. It's worse cause he was the only one left after my parents died.

Sighing, tears threatened to spill out, me blinking them back quickly once the phone rang beside me, me jumping.

I grabbed it, pulling it to my ear as I wait for a voice to talk so I'd know if I wanted to talk to them or not. That's my trick.

"Hello?"

I heard my therapist's voice say through the phone, me sighing.

"Hi Ms. Lohan"

I pretended to sound happy and cheerful as I always do.

"So about your therapy sessions.. I think we need to make appointments more often"

She politely said, me glaring my eyes. She didn't help me. She only wanted the money that I had.

"I'm sorry.. Ive got too much on my sleeve.. M-maybe later"

I lied, hanging up the phone before I could hear her give a response.

Clenching my jaw, I sat there quiet and stiff as I licked my lips.

"I've gotta do this. I've got this"

I motivated myself to get up and go out, but my legs didn't want to leave my comfy couch, and my mind didn't either.

Laying down, I closed my eyes, hoping to see Harry happy in my dreams again.

All that I've got from him since the accident were tons and tons of horrified flashbacks, turning my dreams into nightmares.

"Come on, come on"

I scolded myself as my eyes fluttered closed, my mind taking me elsewhere than this terrible life.

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