It wont hurt forever


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1. Prologue

Waking up to the same darkness. This very known darkness, almost appreciated. 
Well maybe not appreciated, but still better.
Better than having to see the world. Having to face reality. This world, this reality that is nothing but what should just be a bad nightmare. Except it's not. It's real. As real as the suffocating agony she feels in her chest that threatens to spill and break her any minute. No. She cannot let that happen. This darkness, this denial, this emptiness is what keeps her going. It has to be.
How else could she force herself to get out of bed? If she felt just an inch of these feelings, she wasn't even sure there would be a "herself" anymore. So she continued this way. Going round in circles, always doing the same just because then she wouldn't have to think of something new. 

Chosing this way, not really alive but not really dead either. Somewhere in between. She knew she couldn't keep it like this forever. Someday she would have to make a choice. 

 

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