"Head in the clouds, got no weight on my shoulders"
When I was little, I thought life was perfect. But now, everything is a lie. I face things every single day ever since my mom died. About 80 percent of them involve my dad. He wants me to be something that I'm not, and it's stupid. I can't change myself, but in order to appease to him, I made this compromise with him. This compromise was worse than what he wants me to actually be. I've got 99 problems. But you, Ashton, won't be one.


38. epilogue: Problems


"I hope I can keep this promise."

I sigh as I write that final line and ending the sentence with a period. I close my eyes and take a deep breath closing my notebook labeled "Connor's autobiography". I set the notebook at the edge of my bed and pull out my phone to text Marlee, all the way in South Carolina while I'm in New York.

To: Mar "Finished my autobio project."

From: Mar "the one you told me you had to do as a final project for your creative writing class?"

To: Mar "Yeah. Aerin is about to wake up soon so I wanted to finish beforehand."

From: Mar "so that's why you texted me at seven am when I don't have a class until ten."

To: Mar "doesn't Ellie have a class at eight? And you need breakfast."

From: Mar "thanks mom ;)"

To: Mar "we need to hang out over the summer before you have to go back to SC for cheer camp. Btw congrats on almost winning the national title."

From: Mar "you said that back in January. But I'll make sure you stay away from Ashton."

To: Mar "okay yes we broke up but it was for the good of us. That doesn't mean I have to stay away from him totally."

From: Mar "I had to comfort you during spring break because you were a mess and Aerin texted me saying it was an emergency."

"Hey Con how's the story going?" I hear Aerin from her bed sounding groggily. I set my phone down and look at her.

"I finished. I stopped after my high school graduation and me telling Ashton that I promise that our relationship...will work out with him in Alabama and me here." New York is so different than California. Like I actually had a winter.

I feel her put a hand on my shoulder. "Hey, a first love is hard to get rid of. But I'm sure there will be other guys out there like Ashton." She says.

I sigh. "Yeah." I decide to change topics. "Wanna grab some breakfast?"

She chuckles. "You know me." She answers and throws a bra on under her shirt and walks out in her pjs to the rec area of our sorority house, Nu Alpha Phi.

Yes my roommate and I both were recruited into the same sorority. Go figure.

Before we left: a thought came to mind. A title.

I run over to my notebook and wrote on the first page:

"Problems: an Autobiography by Connor Watson"


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