Let me love you *Completed*

Amanda Wilson is a battered, beaten down girl who's just about had enough. She just wants it to be over and it's about to be, until a new kid comes into town. Seth Monroe. He can't figure out what's wrong with her, why she won't open up, why she can't let him love her. Is Amanda to broken to open up?


20. Thoughts

My date was set. Saturday. Tomorrow. At exactly 3:00pm, I would kill myself. Seth and Olivia weren't enough to live for anymore. I wasn't going to use pills again because I'll just end up in another hospital. No. This time, I was going to stab myself. They can't fix those wounds. It's impossible. Halfway through writing my note, my phone buzzes. I pick it up and see a message from Seth.

Seth: hey gorgeous😘 you busy?

Amanda: I'm far from pretty. And no.

Seth: good coz I'm outside.

I look out my window and sure enough, Seth's waving and grinning. I take a deep breath. Tonight would be my last night with Seth. I wanted to make it special. I put on a sleeveless tight black dress with a low neckline and it ended barely below my butt. I left my hair in loose ringlets and put on silvery makeup that makes my eyes bigger and brighter. I put on red lipstick and I take a silver purse, walking downstairs in my black heels. When I get out the door, Seth's jaw drops and I blush, looking at the ground and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. He brings me in a tight embrace, and I smell is comforting cologne. Have I ever told you how sexy you are? He squeezes my butt and I squeal. He guides me to his car. Where do you wanna go? He asks, staring at the road. I put my hand on his thigh and squeeze it. Club or Restaurant? I bite my lip. I hated the rank smell of alcohol, the flashing lights, and the thumping music. Normally, I would go with what he wanted to do, but since this was my last night with him, I wanted to make it special. I wrap my arms around his waist and lean my head on his shoulder. He kisses my hair. Baby, baby. He whispers affectionately. You don't know how much I love you. My heart hurts. What would happen to Seth after Saturday? I didn't want to break him- I loved him more than anything. I love you more than anything. I say shyly, quietly. He messages my back as he continues to drive.

When we get to the restaurant, I sit as close as I could to him. We talked and laughed. I forgot I could laugh so hard. He sees the cut on my upper thigh in between one of his rants. Oh shit. I shoulda worn skinny jeans. Amanda, what's that? He points to the scar. I cover it with my purse and smile. The craziest thing happened. My dad told me not to run in the house with socks cause we had hardwood flooring. One of the panels was sticking up and I fell. Trying to get up, I pulled back and it started bleeding like crazy. He looks at me in awe. Are you okay baby girl? He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. I nod. He took away my socks though. He laughs. Your dad sounds pretty cool. He grins. I chew my lip. Yeah.....I guess. What would you want to name your kids? I think about that for a moment. Willow. He looks at me and smiles. After we ate, I went back to his house and did it with him one last time. I was going to miss my soul mate, but this was greater than him. He'd find some other girl who didn't have as much problems as I did. When he dropped me off at my house at 5:00am, I climb through my window and sleep in my dress, wishing that night would've never ended.

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