Bad Boy Horan

You Sometimes Think That You Want To Disappear.
But All You Want Is To Be FOUND.
"Don't Worry I'll Stay In The DARK
Where I Belong....."


10. Hateful past

Anushka's pov

I put on my shirt and my skinny jeans, applied some lip gloss, my earrings and rings. i looked at the mirror last time satisfied I was looking good. Today I was very early for the college so I had free time. I thought I'll call Brook and all my friends to hang out. but it was too early, whatever who cares.

I picked my phone and called Brook. The phone started to ring but no one was answering it so I thought I'll let her sleep. I called Perrie and Eleanor but the same response. I thinking everyone are snoring on their beds. sought I'll go to the park so I got my keys and went to the park.

I saw a swing and at there swinging looking at children playing , they were looking so happy. Some elders making a group and gossiping while some doing their regular exercise and yoga. I remember how I liked parks.

I always liked parks. There I am free minded. Whenever any problems would come , I used to go to the park. In london always went to the park whenever I felt lonely and broken. At the age of 12, when someone rebuked me or made fun of me I would always run to the park and stay there till I am capable of returning back to home happily. Not only when I'm san but when I'm happy I come to the park.

I still remember when I was in the high school I was bullied a lot. Everyone used to call me name and always at the end of the day I would be beaten harshly. I used to cry the the whole way to the park,then again cry my eyes out in the park. My parents didn't notice my beatings as they hardly had time for me. They never cared how I was batten and bullied.

I saw my wrist having the faded scars. Yup I used to self-harm. I was fat, Useless, nobody cares about me, even my parents didn't noticed my scars. I was just a useless shit. I never thought like that about myself , I was never insecure about my body. All these bullying and beatings and their harsh talks fitted in my mind.


I entered the college , scared of what they would do to me today also.




"Omg! I saw you, my day would be ruined now!"

"You should go and die"

​"Nobody needs you"

i went to my locker taking in the things they were telling to me. There was tears in the corner of my eyes. They are telling the truth. I am used it now.I always wear jackets so they don't see my scars. 

At the end of the day, I went to the washroom tired of all these hatred towards me. What have I done to them?! I opened my bad and pulled out a razor.I sat on the toilet seat and brought m,y jacket up seeing both my wrists , which were covered with horrible scars.

​I lifted my top exposing my fat stomach. I slides the metal piece on my flesh of stomach and blood started to pour out.I made four cuts. 1. I'm fat. 2.Nobody needs me 3. I'm useless 4. I should never have trusted HIM.

Suddenly the door burst open and in came Maddison, my worst bully i.e HIS girlfriend. Soon her whole group came and saw my scars on my wrists and the newly scars on my stomach. They started to stare on m body especially my scars. I thought they will show some sympathy on me but I was absolutely wrong.

"So you are a self- harming freak!" Maddison said and everyone bursted out laughing at me. I could not contain anymore , I brought my sleeves down and covered my scars. I standed and ran to the exit but I'm always too late."You forgot your daily basis love" Maddison said with her evil smirk.

"P-Please leave me a-alone" I said between my cries. "Do you think I'll let you go to easily , huh?Honey you deserve this" she said now angrily. Soon her contact of hand came to my cheeks. She kicked me on my stomach and my sides and pushed me to the wall holding my hair and said "If you told anyone, this would get double understood". I nodded wimperly.

​She went wither group out after finishing her work with me. I cleaned the blood and bandaged myself. The  next day when I entered everyone started yelling "Self-harming freak!". I could not contain and started crying in front of them. The bell rang and everyone went to their classes. As I was going someone pushed me to a locker.

I Looked up and saw Maddison and her group but the boy's group which was lead by HIM. "Love, today your classes would start early, ready?" She said with devious smile with all of them. They all started kicking and beating me. I cried out of the pain telling them to stop. After 10 minutes or what felt like forever they stopped. I had no energy left as i slid down the locker.

"Babe I have a present for you" His voice made me flinch. He handed me a box. I didn't response."Open it now!" He yelled at my face. I quickly opened it. As I opened it there were tears in my eyes. Everyone started going to their classes laughing at me. It was a RAZOR. I dumped the school and ran to the park away from them.

From that day I was shifted to a new college and there I met real friends and enjoyed there. But then also Maddison and His nightmare frightens me.

"Hey Nicole what ae you doing here!" I looked up and saw Luke calling to me. " We are getting late for the college, let's go!" he said. I standed and went to him forcing a smile. "were you crying?" He asked looking at me.

"Nope" I said that was partially true. He hooded his head unsatisfied with my answer and soon we reached the college. But I have to move on with this hateful past....


Helloo my cupcakes!!
Pretty a long chapter, eh?

I was literally going to cry writing this chapter. :(

But there is more drama ahead!!

For the next update....

COMMENT And Like!!

And thnxx for the comments lovelies...

Your comments always makes my day <3

Luv yah!\

Stay Awsum Guys ;)


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