Love disapears quicker than you can blink

Love is written in different ways. Its seen differently and its felt differently. Love can only last if you want it to. Love always hurts, love is never always good to have.

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4. I love you mom..

   My mom has done some pretty fucked up shit to me throughout the 16 years of my life.. from letting her boyfriends choke me and throw me at walls at the age of 2 years old. From making me and my brother go shopping with the ebt card at 10 years old so she could shot up.. 7 years ago my met this amazing man. His name is James, my step father. He was amazing, he was the only person I trusted with my life, I told him more than I told my own father. I trusted James with my whole life.. My mother is a drug addict and ever since ive been 6 years old she has been in and out of rehabs and jails.. After my mom went back to rehab for the fourth time after being with my step dad he gave up and didn't take her back. He had promised to always be there and never leave me, but we lost our connection, we got father apart everyday..

   I stopped hearing from him, he stopped answering my calls and texts, I lost the most important person in my life.. I got a call one day that wasn't something I could believe.. It was from my mom , "Talya, James is in Texas. He has been doing crack and hasn't been the same." My heart dropped I couldn't respond, my step dad, the one person I trusted fell of the face of the earth. I hung up the phone and didn't except any calls. I have lived with the fact he is who he is I cant change him.. Its funny how you think that if you lose that person you don't know how your going to live, well I thought that and look at me Im still breathing.. I wish I had my step dad more than ever right now. I need him threw this all, I have been but I need my step dad. I need someone to talk about josh to. I have Kacey but she just doesn't understand, she is young.. Be grateful you are Kacey!

It may seem like life doesn't get easier but trust me it does. Life's a roller coaster and all you have to do is just sit back and enjoy the ride.

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