Just me

When the music stops is the only one left behind. Niall Horan...


7. Go on

I worked as usual and when I came home after work, Niall sat outside my door. He was crying and he was shaking all over. I went up to him and sat down beside him. I leaned lightly against him. 
"Okay what have happened?" 
Niall was sobbing and I saw that his whole body shook. 
"This doesn't work ..." 
I took his hand in mine and hugged it tightly. 
"Well honey, it will go well." 
He wiped away tears and looked at me. 
"I was all over the town looking for jobs. Nobody wanted me and when I walked past the pub, I was so close to walk in and buy a bottle." 
I swallowed and squeezed his hand. 
"But you didn't?"
He shook his head. He looked at me for a long time and then he smiled weakly. 
"I'm acting like an idiot?" 
I smiled and shook my head. 
"It takes time to change habits. Tomorrow it will be easier and in a month you wont even think about it." 
Niall nodded weakly. He picked up his second hand and caressed my cheek. 
"That's why I came here. I don't want to disappoint you."


I went into the kitchen and cooked food directly. I saw at Niall that he hadn't eaten anything and I didn't want him to starve. 
"Do you eat a lot?" 
I smiled at him. 
"No, but I eat breakfast, lunch, and something in the evening." 
Niall stood behind me and I felt his hands slide around my waist. 
"You are good at cooking." 
I blushed. 
"No, but I know that you have to eat." 
He laughed a little bit and kissed my neck. 
"Shall I put out plates?" 
I nodded and smiled big. 
"If you want?"
I looked in the sly at Niall. He set up two plates, two glasses and cutlery. He was very similar to his old self and I still remembered how it felt when One Direction still were a group. 
"Why don't you meet Liam and the others?" 
Niall looked at me and he lowered his eyes. 
"Because I'm ashamed of myself. They have managed to do something after we finished." 
I turned off the stove and put forward the pots. 
"Maybe you could call them one day?" 
Niall hesitated. 
"What should I say? Hey this is Niall Horan?" 
I smiled and sat down. 
"Yes, why not?" 
Niall hesitated. I saw at him that he still liked the idea, though he didn't dare to do it.
"They are far away." he mumbled. "Harry isn't in this country and they have children, and other things that take up their time." 
I looked at him when he put the food on the plate. 
"There's no obstacle." I said honestly. "They have families, but what does it matter? They can still find a day to meet you on." 
Niall nodded. He looked at me and smiled weakly. 
"I'll think about it."


Niall stayed over that night. We lay close together in bed and I felt how he held me. It was a wonderful feeling throughout my body and I didn't want anyone other but him. 
"I was your favorite?" Niall whispered suddenly. I looked up at him and laughed a little bit. 
"You and Louis. But I think it was you I wanted most." 
Niall laughed a little bit and looked at me. 
"I had so much fun on stage and it was something extraordinary." 
I nodded and kissed him lightly. 
"You were wonderful. I loved you all the time and I was also at your last gig." 
Niall was surprised. 
"Where you? It was only five hundred persons there? "
I grinning. 
"Yes, and I stood at the front of the stage, but you could barely see us anymore. You played and did what you could, but nothing more."
Niall nodded and looked up at the ceiling. 
"I was done even then. I had begun to drink. We were enemies in the group and everyone just wanted to quit. I was so scared." 
I listened and nodded. 
"I saw it on you all. You didn't have fun together anymore." 
Niall agreed. He smiled quickly at me. 
"It's long since I've talked about that time. Everything was over in one night and I thought I would start living life. I was so wrong. I burned all my money in two years and I thought I could manage to stop drinking. "
I kissed him. 
"Well, now you have been able to stop?" 
He smiled and nodded. 
"But I still want to drink." 
I shook my head. 
"Stay away from the bottle."
Niall sighed. 
"That's what I do. But it's hard. I feel the whole body is screaming for alcohol." 
I had never felt that way. I didn't know what it was like to be addicted. 
"We will handle this." I whispered. Niall nodded and closed his eyes. I saw that he was tired, but me myself, lay and thought about before. On my old room and all the emotions that their music had given me. It felt like yesterday when I stood among thousands of screaming girls and just screamed. Every time Niall moved on his hip I was about to faint. I loved him and I adored his land. The last gig wasn't that Niall there. He had been pale and he barely had the strength to remain on the scene. Liam had said a few words, but they put no energy into anything. The songs had been good, but that was all. As they walked off the stage, I had been crying. I had felt an emptiness inside me and I didn't understand that it really was over.


In the morning, I went as usual into the shower and to washed myself. I had plenty of time before I would be at work. I felt my body was clean and was surprised when Niall stood behind me. I spun around and immediately he took me in his arms.
"I wanted to be with you before you go to work."
I giggled.
"So you decided to take a shower?"
Niall nodded and moved on me so he could soak his hair. I looked at him he perked to the water. He then looked at me again and smiled big.
"Closer than this to you, I can't ever be."
I grinned and felt how he took his hands around me again. He kissed me and I responded to the kiss. I was surprised when he lifted me up against the shower wall and he held me tight under my butt. He groaned slightly and smiled.
"You're so hot." he mumbled. I giggled and took my arms around his shoulders. I felt he was moving towards me and right as it was he penetrated. I moaned and he pressed me harder against the wall. I felt how he began working with the whole body and he groaned against my cheek. Niall was stiff in his movements and I felt how he quickly got up to speed. I slammed into the wall and I heard him moan in my ear. I closed my eyes and let him continue. I felt how he was pumping and finally he came. He pressed himself into me and shook before he calmed down. I was surprised when he dropped me on the floor and let his hand slide down between my legs. He began to caress me and it wasn't long until I stood and whimpered. I had my arms tightly around his neck and pushed him against me. He kissed me and he let a finger penetrate. I groaned loudly as he reached my g-spot.


Afterwards, we were just looking at each other. I held him and he held his arms around me. 
"I'll try to look for a job again." he whispered and smiled weakly. "Can I come here tonight?" 
I smiled and nodded. 
"You are welcome at any time." 
He nodded and I kissed me lightly. I saw at him he looked frightened and I wondered if it was due to the craving for alcohol or the idea that no one wanted him?

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