My child

I lost my child (by adoption), I lost a part of myself and I had to continue. I had no idea where my daughter was and I wasn't the girl who dared to think of her.


3. Candys life

"I'm Candy!" 
I was startled and turned around. The girl who had come up to me, also worked in the grocery store and she was in my age. 
Candy smiled big and she giggled lightly. 
"Simon said you had started here and I was glad. I have been the only one in our age a long time and it's fun with new people." 
I nodded and smiled. Candy was blond, blue-eyed, and she looked like a model. I wondered if she knew she looked good? 
Candy laughed and then she looked at her wristwatch. 
"I'll free after at three o'clock, we'll meet at the pub?"
I nodded a little bit. A friend? Did she want to be my friend? I wasn't used to such girls. Most often used all look askance at me and they know that I had been pregnant at one time. Not even the guys were interested in me. My reputation was ruined. 
"What a pub?" 
She laughed and pointed toward the door. 
"Whoever's closest. I can wait for you?" 
I nodded and smiled. Why not?


Candy was like a whirlwind. She talked a lot and she was laughing the whole time. We went to a nearby pub and we sat down at a table. She ordered two beer for us and I actually had a funny moment. All of, pep her mobile. She picked it up and sighed. 
"Damn that's my boyfriend." 
I swallowed. 
She snorted and gave me a quick glance. 
"I'm thinking of breaking up with him. He has a daughter, is single and I hate children." 
I was her opposite. Why should children always come between. It wasn't the child's fault that her dad was single.
"He's so fucking annoying." she continued and sighed. "He's however good in bed and that's why I've stayed. His daughter's just in my way and he always has that little thing with him. A pain for me, but he says he's always going to take care of her in the best way. he won't even leave her with a babysitter when we're having fun."
Her phone rang and she was almost angry. 
"I can't be with a friend?" she almost screamed in the handset. "Niall, I'm so fucking tired of having to take care of her. She's your responsibility and I ..." 
I was quiet. I looked at her and I almost lost my breath. Why was she so mean to her boyfriend? 
"You're crazy!" she hissed into the phone. "I'm with my friends and I want to have free time. I can't sit with your fucking daughter all the time."
I drank the beer, and noted that many stared at Candy. She sounded like an evil bitch and she sounded so mean. 
"Niall you have to come here if you are going to get me." 
She slammed the receiver down and she was angry. 
"He's a fucking idiot. Just because he wants to sit at home and play daddy, I don't have to set up." 
I swallowed. 
"Why are you so angry?" 
She sighed. 
"I met Niall last year. He's wonderful but he happens to have a daughter. He's twenty five years old, but behaves like a ...." she looked at me and seemed to try to calm down. "I'm sorry I got mad."
I had no idea what I would say. I felt that her boyfriend was right. if I myself had got my daughter in my life, if I hadn't adopted her away and I had done the same thing as he did. It was a touchy subject for me and I didn't like when people hated children. 
"It's not the daughter's fault?" 
Candy disagreed, but she chose to nod. 
"Okay, it's not her fault. Nialls former girlfriend died and he has suffered many times in life. I know I should be understanding, but I'm twenty years old. Life contains more than children and the home."


I had no understanding of Candy's actions. When I went home I thought about all the choices we had. Niall had a daughter, and if I had been his girlfriend, I had been sitting at home and laughing with his child. I knew I was an odd girl and I knew that many people in my age just wanted to party.


On Thursday was Candy in happy mood. She came up to me and gave me a note. 
"My phone number and my address. Your coming home to me on Saturday and we'll go out and have fucking fun." 
I hesitated and looked down at the paper. Candy laughed and corrected her blonde hair. 
"Niall's home, I know, but I'm not going to sit and hold his hand." 
I looked up at her. 
"Is it okay for him?" 
She grinning. 
"I don't care which. You just coming to my home and give me a reason to go out."
I was still unsure. She took her arm around my shoulders and smiled at me. 
"We'll have fun. I promise you that you wont forget that night." 
I nodded weakly. 
"Okay, I will."


I was a simple girl. I didn't have many dresses that looked sexy and it wasn't often that I went out on a Saturday. I liked parties, but not to go out. I finally found a suitable dress and I made ​​sure I looked good. My dark hair was perhaps not as polished as Candys blonde hair, but I had to be satisfied. I put on my shoes and then I left the apartment. I was nervous because I knew Niall wouldn't like that I got there. I wasn't stupid and I knew that Candy was using me. She wanted a reason to go to the pub and drinking all night.


I rang and Candy opened directly. 
"YOU CAME!" she cried and hugged me quickly. She showed me in and I shook with uncertainty. Niall came out from the kitchen and I saw that he didn't like the moment at all. 
"When are you coming home?" he asked. Candy snorted and stood before the mirror. 
"I will going home when I want to come home." 
Niall looked sad. He was actually pretty. He was taller than me, had a normal body but his face was perfect. He had wonderful blue eyes and he had bleached strands of hair. I didn't understand why Candy had something against him. 
"The kid sleeps!" I heard Candy say and she smiled at me. "So you don't have to ..." 
Niall became angry. 
"Don't talk like that about Kitty." 
Candy snorted and looked quickly at him. 
"I live here too, you know. I can say whatever I want." 
Niall was almost furious. 
"Damn, you annoy me. You will do anything to piss me off?"
Candy disappeared into the bathroom and Niall followed. 
"Can't you just once be normal against my daughter and talk nicely about her?" 
I felt like an outsider. I shouldn't have gone there, and I was close to leaving them. I hated fighting and especially when the girl was so shitty. I still chose to stay behind. I walked into the room and immediately caught one of the walls of my attention. Niall had glutamate in and hung up photographs of Kitty. I stood and watched them carefully. I saw a cute little girl with mischievous eyes. He had a beautiful daughter, and she laughed at the camera.


"Let's go!" 
I spun around and saw Candy's face. She snorted against the wall and showed with the whole body that she didn't want to stay home any longer. Niall gave up and he sat down on the sofa. 
"Call me if..." 
"I'll be fine." she snorted cold and went to the door. I had no choice and I followed her out from the apartment. An unpleasant sensation showed up and I realized that Candy wasn't a good friend.

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