(Hey guys I have really worked really hard on this book I am making and so far it is 126 pages long if it was an actual book. I will be posting chapters every couple of days! Please let me know if you like it it would really mean a lot. Thank you!)
Many people don't know much about me. In fact I don't know much about myself either. Both of my parents died about 12 years ago and I am not permitted to know what caused the death of the two people who meant the most to me.
They died from something that has been a secret and only a few people know about what it is. Well, at least I believe that only a few people know the cause of my parents' death. My brother, Dayton, knows some information but he won't tell me anything. He's useless. Even though Dayton is 2 years older than me I think it's unfair that he is able to know the whole story and not me. I have the right to know why my parents died because I am their child. All I know is that they died in order to protect something.
After my parents died I felt like my whole life has been a lie. This is intriguing due to the fact that I know nothing about who I am. I am aware that relatives do know more about my identity than I do but they don't seem to say a word about it. When I ask them about my family secrets they shut out and ignore me like I don't even exist and I'm some ignorant child. This always gets me hot in the face and my blood starts to boil because they don’t think I am mature enough to handle such fatal information. I feel like I don't even exist most of the time. I just know that if my parents were still alive that I would know mostly all the secrets that are hidden from me.
The most evidence I got about my family was when I was just 9 years old. It was Christmas and that year was when it was my grandma’s turn to hold a dinner at our house for Christmas. My Great Uncle Romeo, which is my grandma’s crazy brother, told me something that caused hysteria and made me start to question who I am. As I was walking around giving out cheeses on toothpicks he was a bit drunk and called me over. I walked toward him in my pretty red sparkling dress. I sat down on the couch next to him and placed the silver platter with cheese on the other side of me. I moved closer to him so I could comfort him and he then whispered something in my ear. Something that changed my perspectives on my family forever.
“You, Avery, are very special. You might not know yet but you hold all the power. You are the one who is important. You are transcendent…”
I still till this day have no idea what he was talking about and never said anything about it. I was young and vulnerable so I took every word to hear. My eyes widened and my lips separated and opened wide. I honestly believed every word he said. Now I came to the conclusion that maybe he was just drunk and didn’t know what the hell he was saying. Still I begin to wonder and think about if it was actually true. What if those words actually meant something? Something that could affect me. I can’t be too hopeful though because while he spoke he was slurring his words and waving a wine bottle in his hand. Though that word “Transcendent” still stays firm in my memory.
Anyways in high school I'm known more of the quiet girl who sits in the back of the classroom with only a few close friends. Of course because of this I get abused by vulnerable and delinquent teenagers but I've gotten used to it.
I am 16 years old and I most certainly do not carry my heart on my sleeve. I am more of a personal complex person and I tend to shut myself out from everyone. This may sound like I'm some kind of emotionally wrecked and hormonal teenager but I absolutely am not. I am just a conserved person and I'm on the verge of breaking.
I hate keeping everything bottled up but I do it to protect myself. I only have a few people that I trust and I don't even tell them what I am and what I can do. Even though I am a bit different in a sense I still don't know what I truly am. I feel like I need to find myself.
I have learned some things of my years living on Earth that people are designed to value stories more than facts. I am just another person with all of her stories hidden like a book that is untold. No one can break me or make me open up. I am just another person trying to find herself in this huge despicable world.
If there is one thing that I have realized is that everyday is a different story. What I do today can change my life forever and that is what keeps me from opening up and finding out more of myself. That is why I honestly don't know where I fit in this world I am just here.
I feel like a broken record though. Every day is the same routine just how a broken record plays the same old song. Like I said I'm a regular human being. I get up every morning like everyone else does. I take a nice warm shower, brush my teeth, get dressed in some nice flashy clothing and go to school.
As I walk through these foul hallways I see lovers kissing against the lockers, geeks studying with their eyes glued to their books and idiots laughing about how a girl named Christi, a total weirdo, is doing something that is out of the ordinary. But who am I to judge these people. I have no right to gossip or hold grudges against them because they have done nothing to me for me to do so. So once again I keep it to myself and move forward.
I turn the corner of the hallway and see my friend Isa running toward me and squirming through the crowds of teenagers. She gives me a nudge and smiles. I've never seen her with this much excitement.
"What's wrong? You're too happy today." I say quietly with a little laugh.
"Well do you want to hear the good news or the bad news first?" Great. I’m not very fond of bad news this early in the morning.
"I guess good first." I say with a roll of my eyes.
"Good news is that I got a 94 on my chemistry test that we took last week. Bad news is that we are both going to fail the next one because Mr. Schafer is giving us a pop quiz next period on our last lesson." She says the last part with a grunt.
I don't care about chemistry right now. Whether it's a school subject or a loving relationship. All I can reply with is
"Great another quiz to fail." I say it with a little weak smile.
“What’s wrong Avery? The past couple days you seem very depressed.”
Isa is my best friend and she is the only person I trust with few things. She knows about my parent’s death and she knows that my family has secrets and I feel like I can trust her. She has been my friend since the 5th grade and even though we sometimes kill each other over something so petty she is always there for me.
Therefore I tell her straight out,
“I don’t know. I want to know more about my family Isa. I feel so left out. I just give up.” I let out a little pathetic sigh.
“Listen, everything is going to be fine.” She forgot that she was speaking a little too loud and then she speaks softly again.
“What if you find out stuff and is disappointed in the outcome. Don’t rush into stuff. Come on you are 16 years old lighten up a bit and live!”
She is completely right. Maybe I should hold off on all of this stuff a while. What if I do find out stuff about my parents and regret knowing. “Yea your right. I have no life I need to live a little.” We both laugh a bit and then we are quiet while waiting for the first period bell to ring.
Isa has short shoulder length blonde hair and brown hazel eyes. All the guys think she is so pretty and she has had a couple boyfriends in the past but nothing serious. I sort of envied having a normal life like everyone. I envied the people who have parents and I feel sorrow for the kids that are like me with none. I feel like my whole life is a mystery sometimes and I'm still trying to figure out how to put the puzzle pieces together.
As Isa and I walk to ELA class together I decided to go to the bathroom before the bell rings. She was going to come with me but she wanted to savor the time to study before the first period bell rings so she doesn't fail the chemistry quiz in 2nd period. I didn't have to go to the bathroom I was just bored and needed to put my hair up in a ponytail because it was annoying me just down, laying on my shoulders.
I walk into the barren bathroom which smells like something died in it and look at myself in the mirror. I see something different in me. Not in looks in just the person I am. I feel like I don't know much about myself and I have the feeling that I'm going to find out soon. I take my long perfectly straightened brown hair which reaches to just the bottom tip of my tail bone and slowly put it up in a bow to stall time. I decide to check my make up which is just eyeliner on my water line and a lot of mascara to make my eye lashes stand out before heading back to ELA class.
I figure I've spent long enough in this nauseating bathroom so I turn around. I jump back and hit the back I my leg hard on the corner of the counter. That is going to leave a big bruise. I forget about the pain and have a mini heart attack when I see a middle aged man standing in front of me. I look at him and determine on whether to run out the door and probably get killed or stand still so he doesn't harm me. I turn my body so that my back faces the corner of the room. The man looks shaggy and grimy. He wears a black shirt with an odd symbol on it. He steps closer to me and I begin to get frightened by every move he makes. He reaches for something in his pocket and then at that moment I know that I am doomed...