I knew it.
I knew he would never love me.
He only ever loved her. I could change the world for this boy and he would never notice, he only has eyes for that blonde one on Rue Monge. In that big house, number 58.
I moved to France in 1785 expecting to see great things. I fell in love and then the revolution began. I came here from England as a rich, but humble, respectable young lady at the age of 17.
I can still remember the first attack and what they did to my family.
The men came rushing in at nine o'clock. They grabbed my mother first and then my father and took them outside the house, leaving my brother and I on the inside. We sat, huddled, on the couch.
My breathed hitched in my throat. "What was that?" I asked Jonnie. "I don't know, Perrie." He replied.
I heard it again. And another three times before a thick silence coated everything. I could hear myself breathing. I could hear Jonnie breathing as well.
"Stay here, Perrie. I will be right back." Jonnie said while getting up.
I nodded. "Be careful."
He nodded and walked out of the living room where we were both sitting seconds earlier. Now it was only me and I was starting to feel his absence.
It was ten minutes and Jonnie still hadn't returned. I stood from my place in the corner and wiped my eyes. I slowly made my way to the front door where Jonnie had gone. When I reached the front door he was just standing with tears in his eyes and his mouth partially open.
I looked in the direction of where he was looking.
I gasped and covered my mouth. What I saw hurt and shocked me. I know I will never be able to get that image out of my head.
My parents lay dead in the street. Those men that came had come and executed my parents in the middle of the street. Other people had been killed too but I was only focusing on my parents.
That was 4 weeks ago and since then my brother and I had to live in the streets with nothing but the shirts on our backs. I had only a dress with a thick belt around the middle. ((If anyone has seen Les Miserables I am talking about the dress Eponine wears)) My brother only wears simple clothes ((What Marius is wearing in the scene were Eponine dies)).
I am now 20 and its 1788. I know what the school boys are planning and when they will put this plan into play. The boys will attack the French Monarchy on the day of General Lamarque's funeral. Lamarque was the man that spoke for the people here below, the ones that live in the gutter and don't have a say.
He was an honourable man but had been sick for quite some time.
His funeral was in three days and all the boys were preparing. Including him.
Andre. He was my best friend but he had no idea that I was madly in love with him. Now he has gone and married that bourgeois girl. I have no idea what he sees in her.
Jonnie and I are currently in out hide out down the road to the pub. "Hey Jonnie?" I look over at my brother who is nibbling on a small peice of bread. I already ate my days share of food.
"Are you going to fight with the others?"
"Why?" I ask whining a little. He is the only family I have left and I don't want to lose him.
"Because this monarchy is tearing this country apart and if I don't then we will have no chance in having a home and being equal with the fat ones."
I giggled a little.
All I know is that I wont lose Jonnie.
Today is Lamarque's funeral and the boys have the whole thing planned and are willing to allow anyone to help them. Thats where my plan comes into action. I have stolen some clothes from one of the rich boys in the revolution and am now putting them on. It's just a shirt and some pants. Also a hat that will be able to hide all my hair.
Yes, I'm going to dress up as a boy and participate in the attack.
When I arrive alone at the funeral the attack begins. Shooting comes from every direction and I'm caught in a cross fire. Police and revolutionaries are firing from every direction and I can barely see where I am going.
I keep Jonnie in my sights at all times. Once we make it back to the barricade I take shelter behind a wooden chair. Soldiers come in from the other side of the barricade and I start shaking with fear.
I'm going to die.
No, not now, you can't think those things when you have someone to protect. I would gladly give my life to save Jonnie, I think.
I spot Jonnie over behind a table pointing a gun at the enemy. I grabbed a gun, that someone was passing up, and pointed it at the enemy. Beads of sweat were rolling down my forehead and I was breathing heavily.
"Fire!" I hear from the other side of the barricade. "Fire!" Comes from our side of the barricade as well. Men start shooting and I shoot too, blindly though so I'm not sure if I hit anything. I see a man fall in the direction I was shooting in so I assume that I hit him.
The soldiers keep advancing and they are better shooters then us. They have a landslide advantage. Our men keep shooting but the soldiers keep advancing. They start to climb up the barricade. The closest soldier, to me, is about five metres away. I start to panic and soon I am unable to fire the gun from sheer panic.
I look over at Jonnie, he is shooting a man thats right in front of him. I climb through the barricade and stop when I'm behind him. I put my hand up to my forehead and pull away to see red. A peice of furniture must have cut me on the way over. Blood threatens to run over my eyes but I wipe it away just in time.
"Perrie? What the hell are you doing here?" Jonnie yells angrily, not taking his eyes off the enemy. "I would never let you do this alone, you can't die here!" I yell back.
"What would happen if you died here, Perrie? Go! Go and hide with the other women!" He yells in return.
"I'm not going to sit around and be useless when I can be here and help you!"
He stops arguing after that. A man comes right up to me on the barricade but I throw my knife into his stomach. I gasp as he falls off the barricade. I can't believe that I am killling these men. Even if it is for a good cause I shouldn't be doing this. It's wrong in so many ways.
Another man replaces the dead man on the barricade in front of me, I can't do anything. He brings his knife up and the world goes into slow motion. All I can see is the man and his knife.
Jonnie shoots the man before he could bring down his knife. Jonnie gives me a look, his hair is sticking to his head from all the sweat. A man comes up behind Jonnie but he hasn't noticed it yet. He is still looking at me. The soldier pulls out his sword and lifts it up above Jonnie.
"No!" I streach out the 'o' sound and I push Jonnie down the barricade. The mans sword was already in motion when I pushed Jonnie so when his sword comes down. Instead of getting Jonnie the sword hit my chest and a giant gash was created down my front side. Pain is all I can feel and black is clouding my vision.
Everything around me is a blur as I roll down the front of the barricade. I fall on the ground at a mans feet. The man screams a battle cry and shoots another soldier on the barricade. The same man picked me up and carried me to a door. My vision had little black dots dancing in them. I couldn't move as the blood ran all through my clothes and down my side.
I realised this man was Jonnie and he was uninjured. He bangs on the door.
"Please help me!" He screams. A women opens the door in a hurry and shuts it again behind us. Jonnie sets me down on a table and his hands are covered in blood. I feel as though my soul is leaving my body. Jonnie brushes the hair out of my face.
"Are you alright?" I ask Jonnie giving him a weak smile.
"Of course I'm alright, who cares about me look at you, you-you.." He has tears in his eyes. I start to cry too. "I am in no pain and your here and I am alright." I say to him.
The lady that owns the house has left.
Jonnie starts to weep uncontrolably. "Don't cry, Jonnie, I'll be fine. So will you."
I think of Andre as my life deteriorates, I will never be able to tell him.
My hand falls on my chest and my eyes go completely black and I am no longer aware of my surroundings. Black encases everything.
Sorry not sorry. I can't believed I killed Perrie. I just want you guys to know that I have nothing against One Direction or Perrie Edwards. I love them both. I actually think Perrie is absolutley gorgeous and Zerrie is so cute.